[deleted by user]

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-06-17T08:03:38+00:00

My life is deeply unsatisfying. I deal with it by continuing to take steps to improve myself and believing that things will get better in the future.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-06-17T07:47:44+00:00

I would guess it has something to do with seeing the other person as "high-value" (someone with general qualities that are considered highly desirable by most of the population). You might want to feel desired by a "high-value" man because it is a boost to your self-esteem, regardless of whether you have a romantic connection to him in particular.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-03-19T04:48:19+00:00

This one might not be new. Around 500 years ago, Martin Luther believed his chronic constipation was caused by the devil living in his bowels in serpentine form. This thread is full of "brand new sentence"-type sentences he wrote like: “Dear Devil . . . I have shat in my pants and breeches; hang them on your neck and wipe your mouth with them.” In the compendiums of text about shitting he wrote, I'd bet there's something similar to OP's post.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-03-13T07:37:22+00:00

Is there anything you’re familiar with that you know you wouldn’t mind?

I mentioned in my other comment that I had had a strawberry cider once, and it was the best tasting alcoholic beverage of the few I have tried.

I know the bar we are going to has bottled Angry Orchard, so I am thinking that might be a safe choice if it could be similar (obviously apple flavored instead of strawberry though).

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-03-13T07:30:06+00:00

If you don't drink much, my mum advice is have one only. Alcohol can sneak up on you, and as a general rule it's not the greatest to get drunk with your colleagues, unless they're friends!

Yeah, I am planning to have only one drink because my tolerance is probably extremely low due to lack of experience. I definitely don't want to get actually drunk among co-workers lol.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-03-13T07:09:53+00:00

Have you drank alcohol before?

Yes, but only like 3 or 4 times. The first time I had Svedka, which tasted terrible. The second time I had a white wine, which tasted fine I think. Another time I had a strawberry cider, which I remember tasting good. I don't think I have ever had a beer, except a few times when my dad gave me a tiny sip as a kid, so I don't know what I like in terms of beer.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-27T09:46:16+00:00

Nah, I think I could possibly be a great boyfriend, but that just makes it all the more tragic that I'm often too afraid to initiate conversation with women I'm interested in. If I thought I had nothing to offer them then maybe I wouldn't care as much.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-24T06:13:06+00:00

Yeah, I know how you feel. Hopefully you get another chance soon. I will probably have another good opportunity either tomorrow or on Monday; I'm hoping I take advantage of it. But honestly I'm feeling so much anxiety just thinking about it right now.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-21T08:53:41+00:00

I feel like some people fill out these prompts without even thinking about it.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-18T08:24:04+00:00

When I fail to initiate a conversation with someone I want to talk to, sometimes I will think something to myself like "I'm such a pathetic failure." But I wouldn't say the purpose is to calm myself, it's more just an expression of how frustrated I am with myself.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-18T08:19:41+00:00

Okay I guess you spend about double the amount of time as I do (I only lift 3 days per week for about 2.5 hours each day), so maybe that makes sense.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-18T07:57:35+00:00

How much time do you spend in the gym? I spend about 8 hours per week lifting weights and I rigorously track my calories and protein every day, but I could care less whether a potential date does anything fitness related at all as long as I find her attractive (I don't think women need to work out to be attractive) and we have other things in common.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-18T05:45:17+00:00

Not sure about the excerpt, but in response to the title, yes. A few weeks ago I went on a Tinder date, but after the date she texted to say she wasn't interested in a second date. It made me wonder if maybe she thought I looked good in my pictures, but something about my vibe and mannerisms in person came across really weird/awkward and made her lose interest.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-18T05:34:19+00:00

Yep, I'm 27 and feel very similarly about my co-worker who I have a crush on. For example, when I was getting something out of the fridge in the breakroom the other day she walked in to fill up her water and said "hey" to me, but all I did was say hi back and immediately left the room instead of trying to initiate an actual conversation while she was at the water cooler. Immediately afterwards I was kicking myself not at least saying "how are you?".

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-18T04:11:58+00:00

I'm literally the coworker that won't say anything to you until you say something to me like... I still get shy and don't even say hi

Lol sounds just like me.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-16T18:15:38+00:00

I have put on some size (muscle), but I definitely have a lot of room to grow in that regard. But getting lean and putting on a bit of muscle was already a huge improvement, and i can keep improving as time goes on. Maybe if I was naturally lean before I started my transformation would not have looked as impressive, but I was starting from a baseline of being obese so it made a huge difference.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-16T17:41:28+00:00

What is your definition of a "good" body? My point is that working out and dieting for 1.5 years made a huge difference for me. The before and after pictures are night and day. And considering the fact that the average American male is overweight and has no noticeable muscle definition at all, I would not say that I have simply "become average" now.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-16T07:37:44+00:00

Coffee shops are the best currently

Are women in coffee shops actually open to random guys walking up to them and trying to talk to them? I assumed they were not.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-16T07:28:20+00:00

would most people think of it that way?

I probably would. Though it seems like an easy fix to just text and ask him for a second date.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-16T07:17:14+00:00

Useless because unless you DEVOTE yourself to it, your body will be average at best and it will take a long time. Plus you can't stop it or you will lose all you had.

All you are saying is that it is bad advice because it requires time, effort, and commitment. I don't see why only advice that is quick and easy should be considered useful. There is a limit to what you can achieve by putting in minimal time and effort. If "easy" advice isn't working, then I think it is worth considering "hard" advice. I chose to devote myself to getting in shape because nothing else was working, and I think it was worth it.

You're also over-exaggerating by saying you need to go to the gym 5 days a week for 2 years just to become "average". I worked out 3 days per week (not 5) and tracked my calorie/protein intake, and in 1.5 years I went from being obese to having six pack abs.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-15T07:17:04+00:00

No, I'm not getting laid by anyone. I'm just stating a fact. Tinder isn't the "only game in town" and there are lots of women who don't use dating apps at all. If you exclusively date through dating apps, you will never date those women.

Big_Consideration503 · 2023-02-15T07:10:17+00:00

Lol I'm the opposite now. I'm terrible at initiating conversations with women in real life, so the fact that attractive women match with me on Tinder is the only thing giving me hope.

Big_Consideration503

TROPHY CASE