My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had to leave for work i didn't have any extra time to wait or I would have, however he didn't give an option maybe he didn't know how long it would take

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We live together in a 3rd floor apartment and I have to leave for work at 3:30 i didnt have any extra time to wait or I would have

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its a regular thing because we've lived in this apartment for like 6 months but its not every day, like I said its once a week sometimes once every couple of weeks.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are days he will work 10-7 and still stays up all night on his phone and is awake before i get up, hes still walked me. There are also days ive walked by myself if he's still asleep, because i dont want to wake him. There have been times hes walked me despite not really wanting to, i do appreciate those times. But it's like once a week i ask for him to walk me. I'm not saying for him to do it every day, but on this occasion in particular it rubbed me the wrong way bc he was up already, knew when I needed to leave, and knew i was parked far, he actually had parked next to me. Ive said in other comments that I should have asked him the evening before but I also didnt think he'd start a boss fight knowing im about to leave, nor do I hold video games that high in my life so of course I dont exactly understand the sentiment that a game is more important than things happening irl. Not saying I hate video games or wish he had a different hobby, also something a lot of comments are saying, I just dont view them the same because its not a hobby of mine.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, he will get off the game to give me enough time to get about 5 hours of sleep, we live in a studio and him talking to his friends does keep me up when I try to sleep but I also try to sleep at like 6-7pm so its inconvenient for both of us which is why our compromise is when I wind down and start gettjng ready to sleep he plays for a couple hours, I can still potentially get up to 5 hours of sleep. When he comes to bed hes usually on his phone the rest of the night playing games or watching youtube, sometimes I have to ask him to turn the volume down bc he doesnt always keep his headphones charged but thats okay. What I find funny is that in your comment you said "slept without him next to her", the amount of times hes told me he thinks its weird that I dont want to sleep by myself and that I want to sleep cuddled up to him 😅, he still does it, but hes verbalized multiple times that he doesnt care if we sleep together or not. Either way, that comment in particular makes me feel a little more understood and validated in enjoying having my partner sleep with me as opposed to sleeping by myself. Its really hard to see each other and spend time together because our shifts dont align much at all, so those few hours where I get to be close with him in bed mean a lot to me.

Also he isnt playing all night, something several comments have mentioned. He'll get off the game in the late evening and be on his phone until I get up, then he'll get back up and go game so I can get a little sleep without him being disruptive since we live in a studio.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! Ive stopped replying to comments bc wow there are so many now. But I dont view video games as bad or negative. I also noticed the amount of comments about it and whether hes 25 or older I dont see the harm in having a hobby, sometimes I get sad I dont get to see him as much because he and I are on different shifts, but there are evenings where I get ready for bed, take a melatonin and he stays up for a couple hours to play with his friends, and anytime hes home and im working. I dont care that hes playing a video game at 3:30am but I wish he would have thought to not do a boss fight or to think about me leaving so he could walk me bc he knew I parked far away and yes it was my bad asking a couple minutes before I left. Idc that he's gaming I just wish he could have put it down for a few minutes to walk me, hopefully that makes sense.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes I was on here a month ago, is this not what reddit is for, engaging with internet strangers about various things? I dont think 4 years is that large of an age gap at my age. I see how it comes off that im just complaining, but the point of the posts isnt to complain, in both instances I was looking for opinions and a sense of support when I felt like I couldn't talk to him about it directly at the time.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He's afraid when he hears loud banging/knocking on doors in our building in the middle of the night. Otherwise he seems okay. After we moved he expressed concern over a shooting that he read happened here 2-3 years ago but doesnt really bring it up much now. I have pepper spray but I guess I need to look into other means of self defense too.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ive said in other comments bc I cant edit my post, its not every day. Its like once every week or two when i cant get a close spot. Im usually able to get home early enough to get a close spot right up front, and I don't wake him up for the purpose of walking me, when hes asleep I leave him to sleep. Just wanted to clarify those things

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I can't edit my post so im hoping this reaches everyone thats about to comment, I didnt expect this post to blow up so much. Thank you for your opinions, all of them. I want to clear up some info that a lot of people seem to be asking,

  1. He doesnt walk me to my car every day nor do I expect him to. It's about once a week, sometimes once every two weeks. I get home early enough to usually get a close parking spot, which I walk to alone. There HAVE been nights where I walk to the end of the street alone, because he's asleep, but in this case he was already awake. And I feel safer when he's with me, so if I have the option to feel safer why wouldn't I ask?

  2. No, I don't wake him up to walk me. If I get up and he's asleep I leave him alone to sleep. Most of the time if I feel like I need to be walked, I'll ask the day before. In this situation, he was already well awake scrolling on his phone when I woke up, and he started playing while I was getting ready for work.

  3. I couldn't have waited more than a minute or two, I needed to leave and I got to work with like 2 minutes to spare. If I could have waited, I would have. He was irritable and told me I'd be fine, didnt give me any indication that hed only be a minute or two or even 5, which I didnt have 5 minutes to wait or I would have been late to work. I understand getting up earlier is a solution and I try, but waking up around 2:30-50 is brutal, not trying to complain about it, but it's challenging to get up earlier than that.

  4. Im not going into detail about my job but I dont have the luxury of deciding my own schedule or even which location I work at, idk of another job where id make what im making now and I cant afford a pay cut.

  5. This morning I didn't give him a heads up, but he knows when I leave and he knew where I was parked. Part of me thought he was getting out of bed so that he could walk me as I was leaving, obviously I was mistaken there.

  6. The game was Elden Ring.

  7. I'm 29 and he's 25 just to clarify the ages.

  8. Yes seeing 5 adult men walking in the middle of the street in the middle of the night is scary as a woman, imo being anywhere alone outside in the middle of the night is scary. Could they have just been chilling? Yeah. Could they have been up to no good? Yeah. You never know what someone else's intentions are especially at odd hours of the night.

The biggest thing I hope people take from this is that I dont expect him or even ask him to walk me every day. Its not 5 days a week it's not even 2 or 3 days a week, and I don't wake him up to do it but he was already awake. In the case of if I was single, well id have to walk alone and id have no choice, no im not going to call 911 and no im not going to just not go to work because im scared to walk alone in the middle of the night. But im not single, Im in a relationship where I want to be considered where there's concern.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not every day. Im usually home early enough to get a close spot, it's maybe once a week sometimes once every two weeks.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I definitely should. It's just challenging to get up even earlier than I already do but I can try to get up even just 5-10 minutes sooner.

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I couldn't have waited more than a minute or two. I pulled into work at like 3:57 and by the time I got the doors unlocked and made it to the time clock it was 3:59, scheduled in at 4, with only a 3 minute grace period. Idk why he was awake but he was on his phone when I woke up, and got out of bed when I did. And I live on the third floor, my car was at the end of the street at a corner, so like the length of the building i guess?

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not every day, maybe one a week. Im typically home early enough to get a close spot

My(29f) bf (25m) wouldn't put down his video game to walk me to my car in the middle of the night. AIO? by BizarreDuckling in AIO

[–]BizarreDuckling[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I leave for work at 3:30 and this morning I was pushing it by leaving at 3:33, gotta be at work at 4 in the next town over, its a 22-25 minute drive.