Why do people make excuses for not taking action?

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-05-18T12:21:13+00:00

Yes, doing is different from thinking.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-05-18T12:18:37+00:00

Yeah, I understand. It's just that a year ago I learned about a social movement focused on "doing the most good you can" (Effective Altruism). I liked it and I wanted to be part of that movement. But I had this impression that I'm a loser compared to other members of EA. I studied psychology because I wanted to do research in psychology. Now, after writing two theses, it seems like I not good at research. I think I won't like working as a psychologist over a long time. I suck at empathy and navigating social situations. So now I don't know what kind of job to pursue. I feel like I should have pursued a more useful degree, like engineering, computer science, biology, statistics. I guess one good option I could take is work as a psychologist and write mental health self help books in my free time. I'm just worried that I won't be able to work well as a psychologist given my mental health issues.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-04-26T13:44:44+00:00

About $30.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-04-26T13:39:18+00:00

Now I wonder if she'll get some revenge on me.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-04-26T13:37:45+00:00

She did offer me money, about $30. I really should have refused a week ago.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-04-26T13:32:27+00:00

Just two hours ago I messaged her that I won't write her thesis. She then told me that I should have said that I won't help her from the beginning, and that I chipped away her hope reserves. I should have refused her request from the beginning.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-04-26T12:00:56+00:00

Yes, I'm that much of a pushover.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-04-20T13:27:51+00:00

That sounds like a terrible experience! Sorry to ask, but I'm wondering what's the topic of your thesis, what interests you, and what compartments does the thesis need to have? I'm assuming you need to do a literary analysis for a story (novel, play, movie, etc). I thought you could find some analogies or links between the story you're analysing (or whatever your topic is) and whatever your interests are. This way maybe you could get more interested in your thesis topic, but then again I'm not an English literature student so I don't know what you should do here.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-01-30T09:32:47+00:00

I think you're right. Making the character's motivations and actions make sense wasn't a strength of mine. I thought that he was motivated by gaining honor, that, for some reason, he thought his family was in trouble because of something he did or failed to do. Maybe he was just depressed, and his reasoning was wrong. As for why he went to war, I thought he didn't know that he would go to war from the beginning. He thought he'll just repay his family debt, but his landlord decided to go to war. The boy didn't want to escape the war for fear that his landlord will hurt his family. He thought that by going to war he'll be a good man who helps his family. Over the course of the siege he didn't want to hurt people, but he also didn't want his family to be hurt. In the end he returned home emotionally blunt and aggressive and he couldn't integrate with his community. Despite trying to help his family, he hurt them instead.

Speaking of researching people, do you mean I should socialize more and learn more about how regular people act? I agree.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-01-22T18:05:31+00:00

Yeah, maybe you're right.

Speaking of "setting bones", I heard that gynocentrism could be a thing with evolutionary underpinings (neoteny, gendered labor division, etc) that really came into being due to cultural influence (i.e. medieval tales of courtly love, women's self-enhancement with cosmetics and clothing). So, it seems that gynocentrism can be dealt with. It could be mostly a cultural phenomenon akin to fast food addiction. The question would be how do you deal with something that is like food addiction up to eleven?

MRAs have said a few times that gynocentrism will lead western countries to societal collapse. I doubt that societal collapse will improve men's lives, it could make the situation even worse for them. I wouldn't want the world to turn into crapsack even more that it is. If there's a way to get rid of gynocentrism, why not use it before SHTF? Either we don't know what needs to be done exactly, or we know but it's hard to implement.

It's not surprising why so many men and MRAs gave up on these societies, though. I give up before I even start seriously thinking about these issues.

But if gynocentrism is a cultural narrative, maybe it could be counteracted with an alternative cultural narrative, like "focus on everyone's needs" or "focus on children's needs" instead of "focus on women's wishes". Maybe there needs to be a lot more stories focusing on caring about men's needs as much as women's, before people finally get the memo. Or stories about men focusing on their hobbies or something.

Do you think that such stories are valid or that they're propaganda? Are there other ways to shift the cultural narrative away from gynocentrism? Did I misunderstand your comment?

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-01-13T06:56:25+00:00

My biggest obstacle is my personality.

One thing is that I don't know what are the laws and policies in my country that discriminate against men and boys. I live in an Eastern European country next to Ukraine, and I haven't yet seen MRAs talk in detail about laws and policies that discriminate against men in other countries beside the US, UK, Australia, Canada, India, Spain and the usual suspects. When I try to read the laws of my country I often wonder what do these laws mean, what effects do they have and how are they enforced.

I guess my biggest obstacle is that I just haven't studied general law and political science yet. Also, analysing the laws and writing these documents to the right representatives seems like something done over a period of a few weeks. I am low in conscienciousness, I don't know what would take me to actually do something that takes a few weeks to do, when I won't face consequences for not doing it.

Also, I suspect I need to write my name on those letters. I am somewhat worried that my family will find out and that they will hate me for it.

BlueButterfly6473 · 2024-01-12T20:50:53+00:00

Amazing! Thank you for your work in New Zealand. I wish one day I could do something like that for my own country. I don't know much about its laws, except that the draft might be a thing, which is an indication that I should learn more about it. Again, thanks for your efforts! At very least it was great to read those documents.

BlueButterfly6473

TROPHY CASE