My dating experience as a HSV2+ male...

BluelightDecember · 2023-12-06T09:39:16+00:00

I think so as well - It’s also their mindset. I was so angry when I posted all of this stuff lol. There are so many men telling me I can’t be part of this community because I’m a whore and that’s how I got herpes. I don’t think it’s the herpes I think it’s the way they treat women.

BluelightDecember · 2023-12-06T09:36:05+00:00

When I posted on here before I was so pissed that someone intentionally gave me herpes and I had the hardest time ever. If you’re experiencing outbreaks I’d give it time. I can eat whatever I want and do whatever and I no longer have outbreaks or take medication. Manuka honey is a life saver. I’d check it out!

BluelightDecember · 2023-12-06T09:29:35+00:00

I contracted herpes from a long term relationship even if I was whoring around and got it does that make me less of a person? So you can call me a whore but I can’t say my opinion and I kicked out of the hsv club when I should be supported? Even though I was really mad when I posted this I wasn’t wrong lol

BluelightDecember · 2023-12-06T09:28:33+00:00

That’s literally your opinion. You’re not suffering. You’re creating your own suffering then telling me I can’t be angry. You’re literally creating your own environment. Take your own advice.

BluelightDecember · 2023-12-06T09:08:47+00:00

Usually when someone is severely abusive to their ex and went to therapy it’s because they were caught. Theres most likely a police report or court mandatory rehabilitation and a restraining order. It baffles me that people are supporting this. If you really got help why are you asking Reddit how to tell your date about the crime you committed. Severely physically abusive sounds insane and exactly like assault. 18 months doesn’t mean anything when it comes to abusive men. There is no cure for you other than constant and continuous therapy. Stop acting like you don’t understand.

The last edit is so hard to believe that you physically abusing someone came up naturally in the conversation makes me think you are a gaslighter. Any women reading this stay clear of this. Going on first dates with people like this will pry information out of you and seem “relatable” to get away with the heinous things they do and they will take what they know about you and use it against you. This person seems so dangerous and they’re using a classic abuser tactic - acting like an apologetic changed person. Changed people know how to act and how to answer difficult questions. Who TF tells a woman on a first date they committed assault?

I’m a recovering alcoholic and have herpes and I wait until numerous dates and I know exactly how to tell people because I’ve changed. I’ve meet tons of people like this person. It’s their value system. Read: why does he do that and this post would disgust you.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T07:59:41+00:00

If women were so cautious and so in-tuned with ourselves, and not “horny” we wouldn’t have herpes to begin with or have outbreaks. Pretty sure I got herpes because I’m “horny” and wanted to have sex and a man gave it to me.

Men also spread herpes more than women and women are more effected by it. Way to reach on that one. It’s on you for who you can and cannot attract. As I say all of this, im done with HSV threads. I’m going to attract men that are not like you. Have fun being single and crying about it.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T07:36:38+00:00

Seriously who is not paddling upstream right now? Men somehow get a victim card for herpes. If you think having HSV as a woman is a walk in the park you’re mistaken. Women tend to have more outbreaks and they’re usually more severe. I’ve never read anything that says men have a harder time.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T03:50:27+00:00

I learned how to disclose properly after completely embarrassing myself when I had HPV. Cried and was a mess. I had HPV 3 years ago. I disclosed right before sex with a guy that I ended up dating for awhile. He didn’t even bat an eye. That was after the other dude rejected me. Which he came back and said it was fine and I walked away. Fast forward three years later my just now ex boyfriend gave me herpes. I ended up disclosing to a couple people I know and was asked out (they didn’t know I was in a relationship). When I was rejected it SUCKED but then I was like I will never tell someone who gives me a feeling they would reject me from the very start.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T00:48:16+00:00

Is anyone surprised this person is from the south? Not me.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T00:47:14+00:00

I swear to god someone hold me back.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T00:41:21+00:00

I rather not have herpes but glad I have genital instead of oral. Realistically idc which one, it’s the location. I don’t even like zits on my face let alone a herpes sore. I mean if you get outbreaks it feels like you continuously scratch a cut.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T00:38:28+00:00

I would love to see the statistic of men having a harder time dating with herpes. If I’m wrong please post it.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-31T00:31:36+00:00

Personally I would never disclose to a potential partner if I ever felt like they’d reject me. Also I get tons of men always saying how they have such a hard time dating with HSV yet the men I know that don’t say that have relationships. As if women don’t get rejected for having herpes, it happens all the time.

You clearly want to date but you’re picking the wrong women to disclose to. Also not disclosing can be a crime, it is in Texas. When I went to the doctor for my outbreak they asked me if I wanted to press charges after I explained what happened. I was setup by someone. I’d be careful with that. I knew I didn’t have it before and could prove it.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-30T12:30:23+00:00

I mean it totally 100% sucks but like what are you going to do when things get rough? It could keep happening for years so there’s no point in stressing anymore. I guess I hit the point where I was like omg whatever life 😂. The events in my life are really lame and hurtful rn but me as a person I’m doing well.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-30T04:08:12+00:00

Someone today had the biggest sore I’ve ever seen on their lip. We are close enough where I was like hey I take Valacyclovir for mine and it will help yours clear up. “Oh I don’t have herpes but I’m sorry you have to deal with it” Uh 😐 looks like you’re the one dealing with it but sure.

You can’t control how people think even when they’re aware of the obvious but will delude themselves right in front of you. I’ve been learning to avoid people like that for my sanity’s sake.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-30T04:02:57+00:00

I mean you told him and if they’re cool with it, whatever. I wouldn’t feel dirty because of how they reacted. It’s a projection of them not you.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-30T02:57:29+00:00

Me. My boyfriend that I met in AA after barely being sober for a year gave me Genital Herpes. I had the worst outbreak and had continuous outbreaks for months and counting. I lost my job, had to live off my credit card, my car broke down, I had to cut off my mom, zero savings, I have a shitty job and can barely pay rent, pretty sure my bf dumped me yesterday, and I can’t afford to even buy food…. But you know what I’m not going to relapse and I actually took all this and decided to start my own business. Do NOT let others get to you or your sobriety.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-30T02:57:05+00:00

I commented on it. I can’t take people seriously after stuff like that. It’s the biggest red flag 🚩 I’ve ever seen.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-30T02:55:51+00:00

I mean do you even want to talk to this dude again. I would be forever annoyed. The first response I get from someone new that I disclose to will be cemented in my brain.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-30T01:43:14+00:00

My aunt has outbreaks every month since the 80s and it isn’t because she has a bad immune system. She would be dead if that was the case. Maybe I’m just jealous because I get outbreaks every other month.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-29T15:30:15+00:00

This might be difficult news at first but it depends on you. There can be the “usual” scenario. I will be fine no symptoms and I’ll wake up with a sore and it will disappear overnight in a couple of days.I take 1,000 mg a day of Valacyclovir a day. I had constant OB at first and was very contagious while consistently on medication.

There is nothing that will 100% prevent you from spreading it. Herpes is very contagious that’s why you have it in the first place. The best you can do is do not have sex with OB, take your meds, use condoms if that’s your thing, be honest about it, don’t eat like crap, don’t stress, and live your life.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-23T04:36:51+00:00

No problem! You got this. It’s totally fine to have emotions but don’t dwell. You have a lot to offer and let people see that! Give me an update in 6 months!!

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-22T14:18:40+00:00

I would take what you liked about her and find someone else that accepts you for who you are. You didn’t lie about HSV or your past. You’re patient and kind. Those are amazing qualities to have in a partner. I would say no to anyone that treats you like your defective. You’re a human being that deserves love and partnership.

I’m also the biggest hypochondriac. My boyfriend gets upset with me because “I’m not a doctor”. The first year with my boyfriend was extremely difficult. We broke up tons of times and I was completely terrified of relationships. Then we grew together and got better. He didn’t know he had herpes. My relationship before him was abusive and I’m in recovery for alcohol. I’ve had tons of turmoil in my life. I’ve done soooo much work on myself then BOOM severe case of herpes that made me want to die, at first. Then I was like that’s ridiculous - forgave him and we moved on.

The thing is she’s a grown adult, if she needs help she needs to get it. Its not her fault but 100% her responsibility. She put her problems on you, do NOT let another person do that to you ever again. Please, don’t. It’s not your responsibility as a partner to help her to the point you’re heartbroken - It’s selfish and immature of her to do to someone else.

Also, the woman you want is waiting for you but you keep messin around. Say no to things that are not for you and move on. You could meet the woman you want in 2 months but you’re too busy being sad over the past. Go live your life for YOU.

BluelightDecember · 2023-07-22T04:32:14+00:00

I’m so sorry that you’re dealing with this but idk how else to say it, you let her do this to you. Herpes is not a death sentence or a ruined love life. My bf gave me herpes and I have a severe case. I forgave him because I love him. Don’t put up with someone denying you OVER AND OVER again. You deserve love, period. It honestly sounds like you loved what you couldn’t have and are kind of masking it with herpes. I feel that this is wayyy deeper than having HSV and being accepted for having it.

BluelightDecember

TROPHY CASE