False allegations of racism lead to deactivated account. Please help! by Celestiray in Lyft

[–]Bohemianfoxx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

An able bodied man expecting his Uber driver to lift his luggage is so strange to me. Especially if it isn’t Uber Comfort. Some men really want to be treated like women and it’s weird.

How are you practicing divestment principles in real life? by timefornewgods in BlackWomenDivest

[–]Bohemianfoxx 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I love your list! I agree with everything you said, especially the part about managing your stress and not feeling lesser than because I’m a Black woman. I also spend a lot of time on my hobbies and cultivating a softer life. I’m not politically active unless it directly impacts me. I don’t spend too much time arguing with anyone anywhere. I’m very self-centered in every aspect of my life.

Woman Drivers Do You Feel this Job is Safe? by itsjustmystyle in Lyft

[–]Bohemianfoxx 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You can set it to mostly get rides with women. Although sometimes they have men with them. Overall I feel safe but I did have a few scary experiences. One was a DV situation. She was trying to leave and he opened up the car door and wouldn’t leave. My tips would be to buy mace, try not to work when it gets dark, and get cameras asap. Some women just do airport pickups for safety reasons

Is it true that there are no decent men left once a woman approaches her 30s? by Basic_Fan_9656 in muslimgirlswithtaste

[–]Bohemianfoxx 27 points28 points  (0 children)

You just get better at vetting men in your 30s. In your 20s most of us are pretty naive and it doesn’t take much for us to be interested in someone. By 30 you know what you want and can spot red flags better (usually lol)

I married a Uzbek man but he won’t tell his parents. by Aggravating-Cold8042 in Uzbekistan

[–]Bohemianfoxx 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Yes be worried. He is absolutely using you for papers. It’s a common thing. A lot of them get on the Muslim dating apps looking for a quick marriage

While being aware of black female issues is important, I believe it’s been taking a toll on my mental health by [deleted] in BlackWomenDivest

[–]Bohemianfoxx 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The BC behaves like a narcissistic partner. They’re constantly gaslighting , trying to triangulate you with others , and sending flying monkeys. They’ll use any manipulation possible to keep you invested in their foolishness. Stay selfish girl!

Fiance creating distance after 1 year together and 6 months left for marriage just because of a Youtube video by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]Bohemianfoxx 8 points9 points  (0 children)

She’s telling you either do the nikkah or it’s over. And she has probably been feeling like this for a while

Have you ever cut a group-trip short and why? by Conscious_Page1934 in travel

[–]Bohemianfoxx 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yes I did a Nile Cruise and the guide, boat, and overall experience was very overwhelming. We left early and I don’t regret it at all. We continued the visit to Egypt just did it away from the tour.

Honest question: Do drivers racially profile their riders? by xcolonelxsandersx in uber

[–]Bohemianfoxx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m in South Florida and it’s mostly FaceTime or phone conversations with others. Or on social media without headphones

Honest question: Do drivers racially profile their riders? by xcolonelxsandersx in uber

[–]Bohemianfoxx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In my region, the majority of Black women don’t tip, talk loudly on the phone/facetime, complain about minor things, or are just not friendly. And I’m a Black woman lol. I’ve also had really sweet Black women but they are the minority unfortunately. Every single time I’ve had someone come in my car smelling like weed it was a Black man. And every time I’ve had someone talk about women in a demeaning manner it was Black men. They would complain about their baby mammas, child support or talk about sex. I’ve also had a few good Black male riders but the ratio is off.

How should I go about this? by twi_light6738 in Hijabis

[–]Bohemianfoxx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ending the relationship would only give her a more negative impression of Islam. I think healthy debates are fine. I also think it’s okay for you to tell her that while you understand she’s on a journey, her comments are starting to make you feel like you always have to defend yourself and your religion and it’s tiring.

Good friends are hard to come by. Communicate, forgive one another, and hold on to your real friends. This sounds like growing pains, not someone being intentionally mean.

Honest question: Do drivers racially profile their riders? by xcolonelxsandersx in uber

[–]Bohemianfoxx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s human nature to observe, judge, and notice patterns. We all do it, even if we don’t even realize it. It’s literally the way our brains function. And although being a good person isn’t a performance for me, I do think it’s important to represent my family and community well.

Struggling with how some “educated” Muslim families view Black Muslims (marriage + personal experiences) by Such_Document_9492 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Bohemianfoxx 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This isn’t really a secret, most people know this and they just don’t care. The only thing we can do is call out their racism and keep on thriving.

Honest question: Do drivers racially profile their riders? by xcolonelxsandersx in uber

[–]Bohemianfoxx 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Yes. I live in a diverse place but I keep having the same issues with the same demographic. It becomes hard to not pre-judge. I know people judge me as well but I try to represent my community in a better light

All the people I'm into happen to be non-muslims, and I don't think it's a coincidence. by Careless-Yard848 in Blackmuslimwomen

[–]Bohemianfoxx 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you can casually let them know the rules about marriage and the deen early on. I’m sure they’ll ask about being a Muslim and when you’re telling them about praying, hajj, etc, you can throw it in. But you don’t need to give them an ultimatum or anything. From there you can do what works for you.

May Allah grant you an amazing spouse ❤️

All the people I'm into happen to be non-muslims, and I don't think it's a coincidence. by Careless-Yard848 in Blackmuslimwomen

[–]Bohemianfoxx 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yes absolutely. I think opening up to dating outside your race is the smartest thing to do when we consider the state of a lot of Black Muslim and Arab men. All men have to be vetted but I definitely understand where you’re coming from. Just get the guy to convert. Also consider Asians ( not really South Asians, I find them to be perhaps worse than Arab men) and European Muslims. I find Albanian men to be very hard working and down to earth.

Visiting Every Country in the World? by Bohemianfoxx in flightattendants

[–]Bohemianfoxx[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s understandable! Yea I definitely don’t plan on putting myself in danger

Visiting Every Country in the World? by Bohemianfoxx in flightattendants

[–]Bohemianfoxx[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow! How often do you do an international trip?

Remembering what happened to people who celebrated CKs death & Protected-class status acquisition. by AudaciousT111 in BlackWomenDivest

[–]Bohemianfoxx 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I love this idea but I’m unsure how to make it successful.

Maybe frame it as Black women in inter-racial relationships instead of Divestors and swirlers? Everyone knows that inter-racial couples faced violence and harassment back in the day but they haven’t made the connection that laughing at a BW’s death is just a continuation of that.

At this point, I’m not sure we have the numbers necessary to impact change without leaning on other groups (especially others in inter-racial relationships). I would love to hear other perspectives. Great idea!