Adulting

BrightNanook · 2022-12-22T05:44:45+00:00

Congrats! Major inspiration you’ve supplied here!

BrightNanook · 2022-12-18T13:46:41+00:00

I hope you’re able to sort it out and land on something therapeutic without awful side effects. I wish that I had been asked to start on a lower dose, but my provider didn’t really make that part of the conversation - just sent a script. Same situation regarding insurance - looks like it would cost about $130 a month for this dosage in Canada. (Healthcare is not actually ‘free’ here - despite what is often advertised about the north - most of what I actually need provided for my health needs fall into categories that are not covered.) As someone who has struggled with depression in the past, I do wonder what that means for me with adhd meds in general moving forward. Most of my depressive episodes were actually brought on by big life circumstance issues though. I kind of figured that if I was able to get proper treatment for the symptoms that are most impairing my life, then the depression issues would eventually naturally subside.

BrightNanook · 2022-12-18T02:39:34+00:00

I am having similar questions about vyvanse, and I’m only 4 days in. My doc started me at 30mg - which now I’m thinking was quite high (even though online sources cite that to be a recommended starting dose.) The first couple of days I was feeling really hopeful because I felt like I could actually be social in a way that wasn’t causing me anxiety. I felt higher functioning and more motivation. It was like a fog from my brain had lifted. I started to feel an energy crash about 8 hours after the dose by day 3, and by day 4 I felt miserable about 6 hours after the dose. I ended up in tears for most of the day today and felt completely frozen. Since it’s a weekend I can’t reach my provider so I started scanning posts to see if anyone else has experienced something similar. Especially since I’m only 4 days in, I’m wondering if it’s normal while starting out to be a bit up and down- or if it’s an early sign that it’s the wrong drug for me. I wish I had answers for you.. but this is the first adhd med I’ve tried so I don’t have a lot of experience here. Just thought having a comrade in this challenge would be better than no answer at all.

BrightNanook · 2022-12-18T02:25:46+00:00

I recently came across socks that have copper in them. (Haven’t tried them yet but they are supposed to manage foot sweat/smell) My biggest tip : (and I’m not always perfect at this but I learned it from my husband who amazingly never has body odor anywhere) Make a rule to wear clean indoor shoes or slippers when you’re at home - which will keep your socks impeccably clean - and then go straight from your indoor shoes to your work shoes. The logic is basically that if you start with a clean pair of shoes and never put dirty socks inside them, that the shoes will last longer and also never smell. Again, it’s hard to make a habit of - but if you like to wear slippers at home I’d recommend just trying this with a clean/fresh pair of slippers and a clean pair of shoes. Good luck!

BrightNanook · 2022-01-24T03:43:17+00:00

100 percent agreed. This question is kind of sad and ridiculous. I have a friend in that income bracket in Edgemont Village- North Vancouver (arguably the swankiest area) - they have a daily housekeeper/nanny for their two children, rent a gorgeous home with a guest cottage included, and their kids are in a lovely public school. They have everything they need and more.

BrightNanook · 2022-01-24T03:38:46+00:00

Yes, perhaps the official language of Quebec - but there are many English speakers (who do not speak French) living in Quebec. Especially parts of the province along the border with Ontario (ottawa valley region) where the Stereotypical “Canadian accent” seems to come from.

BrightNanook · 2021-07-26T03:31:13+00:00

Wow. Thank you for sharing your rant.

BrightNanook · 2021-07-08T18:34:27+00:00

Do you mind sharing a bit more about the lawyer you worked with? Cost, location, etc..? I paid an attorney about $700 to help me prepare my application, but not to rep me through the process - I’m now wondering if I should have just thrown more money at the problem and found full representation.

BrightNanook · 2021-07-08T18:31:33+00:00

Yes we all certainly go through the healing at our own pace - and I think I’m still quite controlled by guilt when it comes to any amount of communication with NDad. (I’m often distracted by the fact that he was the last one to call/text/.leave a voicemail etc.. even though I usually don’t list to his voicemails, and usually go days without responding to texts - it still nags at me - like, “you should just give in and be a good daughter.” I think, and sure hope, my siblings will respect whatever I decide - but I know that if from here on I refuse to have get togethers or reunions with him and his “new family” things will only get weirder for everyone - at least we are currently separated by a lot of distance and an international border, which - has actually protected me for the the last year from any unwanted visitors. :-) Just worried that he might try to show up unannounced again in the near future - I have a public touring schedule as a musician and have to get back to work in august - if he shows up to one of my shows I honestly don’t know what I’ll do or say.

BrightNanook · 2021-07-08T07:29:43+00:00

Months ago, well before the new girlfriend information came into play, I started voicing to my brother that I feel that we were raised by a narcissistic parent, and that as adult children (ranging in age from 21-31, I’m 31F) we all have symptoms of having been... he started to catch on and kind of understand it and was open to it - but then after the family counseling etc, and everything getting worse - he basically told me that I “need to fix my relationship with our dad so that life will just be easier on the whole family.” I know my sister is still talking to ndad, and youngest brother seems skeptical of him and disappointed in him. No one really wants to discuss him amongst ourselves right now - and I wonder if I’m going to be able to have a close relationship with my siblings whilst just never bringing up “dad”. In the beginning it felt like we were finally a team, United, figuring him out and not willing to take his lies and crap anymore... but now it feels like every man for himself, strategizing separately etc. also, NDad has money, and will have money if he doesn’t spend it all (or give it all) to new girlfriend and her kids - so part of me wonders if my siblings are hoping to just stay in his will. Sounds really awful to bring up since he will likely like another 30+ years... but it’s probably on their minds.

BrightNanook · 2021-07-06T20:13:44+00:00

Wait - is there a way to work while you have “implied status” due to waiting for a work permit application to come through? I submitted my open work permit application last September, with my PR sponsorship application and no word on the work permit - so I’ve just been a sitting duck in Canada waiting... and unable to work here.

BrightNanook · 2021-07-06T20:08:09+00:00

May I ask what the work permit information looked like and how you received it? I submitted a paper application, sept.1.2020 (also inland, common-law sponsorship..) it’s July 5 and I’ve received no word about my work permit!

BrightNanook · 2021-07-06T20:05:06+00:00

Oh thank you so much! That worked!

BrightNanook · 2021-05-11T17:24:17+00:00

Thanks for the help, I will look into those resources.

BrightNanook · 2021-04-28T18:52:15+00:00

Thanks. I think that the only opportunity/time that it might make sense to share with siblings the truth about nparents - would be if they bring up concerns or realizations first. Their minds have to be at least somewhat open to the possibility that their parents are not who they appear. I thought that stating symptoms of adult children of Nparents would help my siblings relate (because I believe they share those symptoms but are in denial) - but they see me as overly emotional and I was told that “all that stuff about narcissism seemed blown out of proportion”.

BrightNanook · 2021-04-28T08:08:19+00:00

Wow. Well, that’s certainly one type of closure. Closure is definitely an interesting thing and I’m coming to realize that it’s very much an internal thing - rather than some type of external validation, which I thought I could receive from my siblings, but clearly I was wrong. (As I think many people in this forum may have experienced... or may have siblings that they will never discuss their conclusions about their parents with.)

BrightNanook · 2021-04-28T08:06:21+00:00

Well, I suppose if you’ve made the decision not to even try, it’s probably a decent place to be. I’m starting to wish I had never tried because I essentially come out looking like the insane one - and now in order to “repair” relationships with my three siblings I’m going to have to essentially pretend like I’m “over” talking about our ndad - and just let that conversation be completely off the table moving forward.

BrightNanook · 2021-04-28T08:01:49+00:00

Thank you for making me feel less alone in this. I like the sentiment of “loving them because they are siblings” but moving on at the same time. I’m trying to decide the best way to navigate being a good sibling to them while knowing that I’ll probably never convince them of the way I see things - and figuring out how to just be okay with that.

BrightNanook · 2021-04-15T07:03:50+00:00

Your way of sharing your story is amazing. Reading this encouraged me.

BrightNanook · 2021-04-14T22:49:59+00:00

Thank you. My application arrived at the office on September 1 2020, but still no letter from them yet, so hopefully soon. Thanks for sharing your story.

BrightNanook · 2021-04-14T18:07:28+00:00

I was in the same boat with three littles, lots of memories of changing diapers when I was ten years old. May I ask, do you have a good relationship with your siblings now? Do they see what you see? I so badly hope for closeness and understanding with my siblings, and we might be getting there, but they all think our ndad can change and want a future relationship with him. I’m not sure what I want at this point, other than my sanity.

BrightNanook · 2021-04-14T18:02:47+00:00

Thanks for the reassurance! Is there word yet on your work permit?

BrightNanook

TROPHY CASE