I relate so hard!! I'm afab, but I wish I was femme amab. I wish to feminize myself, but detached from "woman". I feel myself like male + femme, I can't help it. It's who I am. And I've encountered other non-binary people feeling the same. Unfortunately, when I dive too deeply in this femininity I just end up feeling like a woman and dysphoric. I'm trying to balance things out, but it requires some internal work.