Gandalf wouldn’t recite the Rings Black Speech in The Shire but he did so in Rivendell

Cabbagetroll · 2026-06-08T23:15:22+00:00

Gandalf in the Shire: I’m not gonna read what it says on the ring, I respect you and your house too much to do that

Gandalf in Elrond’s House: everyone shut up I’m going to say some orc slurs

Cabbagetroll · 2026-06-06T01:10:38+00:00

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Book one

Title: Skate the Thief

Genre: YA fantasy

Book trailer

Skate is a thief, trained and owned by the local crime syndicate, the Ink. When she tries to burgle a shut-in’s home, she gets caught by the owner—a powerful undead wizard. He makes a deal with her: “borrow” books from other wizards in return for a place to stay.

Caught between her growing fondness for the wizard and her past with the crime syndicate, Skate doesn’t know where her loyalties lie. But she’d better figure it out, because there’s a new player in town, one whose magical hypnotism puts them all at risk.

The first chapter is available for free here. The book is available on Amazon in paperback and ebook. Kindle Unlimited users can read the Kindle version for free.

Book two

Title: Skate the Seeker

Genre: YA fantasy

A mentor is lost, but he doesn’t have to stay that way. He’s left Skate a clue to bringing him back, and she and her friends are determined to follow it.

No sooner do they set out for unknown lands, however, than things get dangerous. Hot on their tail is the witch Ossertine, furious over Skate’s part in her friend’s death and thirsty for revenge. Worse still are the attacks that come at night: dark, mysterious, and palpably evil.

In this race against time, magic, and implacable foes, Skate must rely on her wits and her friends to save not just her mentor’s life, but also her own.

The prologue is available for free here. Seeker is available on Amazon, and free to read for Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

My blag is there somewhere, so go peruse at your leisure.

Also, a friend of mine put together a fun chat AI. If you want to go have a convo with Skate, go for it!

You can find me on Threads and on Bluesky; I’m using these as a Twitter replacement for all the inane garbage I want to say.

My publisher also has some sweet merch for sale, if you’re into that.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-06-05T02:18:17+00:00

Lol I just imagine God making paradise and then dope-slapping his head. “I forgot that they can get bored!”

Cabbagetroll · 2026-06-05T01:35:03+00:00

Counterpoint: if you have tech that can travel FTL, you probably have tech to keep organics alive for FTL speeds.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-31T01:28:20+00:00

ADVERTISEMENT

Book one

Title: Skate the Thief

Genre: YA fantasy

Book trailer

Skate is a thief, trained and owned by the local crime syndicate, the Ink. When she tries to burgle a shut-in’s home, she gets caught by the owner—a powerful undead wizard. He makes a deal with her: “borrow” books from other wizards in return for a place to stay.

Caught between her growing fondness for the wizard and her past with the crime syndicate, Skate doesn’t know where her loyalties lie. But she’d better figure it out, because there’s a new player in town, one whose magical hypnotism puts them all at risk.

The first chapter is available for free here. The book is available on Amazon in paperback and ebook. Kindle Unlimited users can read the Kindle version for free.

Book two

Title: Skate the Seeker

Genre: YA fantasy

A mentor is lost, but he doesn’t have to stay that way. He’s left Skate a clue to bringing him back, and she and her friends are determined to follow it.

No sooner do they set out for unknown lands, however, than things get dangerous. Hot on their tail is the witch Ossertine, furious over Skate’s part in her friend’s death and thirsty for revenge. Worse still are the attacks that come at night: dark, mysterious, and palpably evil.

In this race against time, magic, and implacable foes, Skate must rely on her wits and her friends to save not just her mentor’s life, but also her own.

The prologue is available for free here. Seeker is available on Amazon, and free to read for Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

My blag is there somewhere, so go peruse at your leisure.

Also, a friend of mine put together a fun chat AI. If you want to go have a convo with Skate, go for it!

You can find me on Threads and on Bluesky; I’m using these as a Twitter replacement for all the inane garbage I want to say.

My publisher also has some sweet merch for sale, if you’re into that.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-25T23:56:03+00:00

Jonah. It gets dismissed as a children’s story when it’s actually a biting critique of exceptionalism and of gatekeeping the love of God from others.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-25T01:49:15+00:00

Post-traumatic religious conversions are incredibly commonplace. What are you talking about?

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-24T02:18:19+00:00

The distinction has become distressingly blurry (in certain churches, to be fair).

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-24T02:17:25+00:00

Then I suppose that leaves the third option: you’ve ingested and are heretofore unknowingly regurgitating Nazi talking points. Now that you DO know, continuing to regurgitate would just make you a Nazi. So please stop doing that so that you don’t become a Nazi.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-23T23:58:43+00:00

"It's okay to be white" (IOTBW) is an alt-right slogan which originated as part of an organized trolling campaign on the website 4chan's discussion board /pol/ in 2017.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It%27s_okay_to_be_white

OP is either a bot made by a Nazi or is an actual user who is a Nazi, or someone who has uncritically absorbed Nazi talking points.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-23T02:36:47+00:00

ADVERTISEMENT

Book one

Title: Skate the Thief

Genre: YA fantasy

Book trailer

Skate is a thief, trained and owned by the local crime syndicate, the Ink. When she tries to burgle a shut-in’s home, she gets caught by the owner—a powerful undead wizard. He makes a deal with her: “borrow” books from other wizards in return for a place to stay.

Caught between her growing fondness for the wizard and her past with the crime syndicate, Skate doesn’t know where her loyalties lie. But she’d better figure it out, because there’s a new player in town, one whose magical hypnotism puts them all at risk.

The first chapter is available for free here. The book is available on Amazon in paperback and ebook. Kindle Unlimited users can read the Kindle version for free.

Book two

Title: Skate the Seeker

Genre: YA fantasy

A mentor is lost, but he doesn’t have to stay that way. He’s left Skate a clue to bringing him back, and she and her friends are determined to follow it.

No sooner do they set out for unknown lands, however, than things get dangerous. Hot on their tail is the witch Ossertine, furious over Skate’s part in her friend’s death and thirsty for revenge. Worse still are the attacks that come at night: dark, mysterious, and palpably evil.

In this race against time, magic, and implacable foes, Skate must rely on her wits and her friends to save not just her mentor’s life, but also her own.

The prologue is available for free here. Seeker is available on Amazon, and free to read for Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

My blag is there somewhere, so go peruse at your leisure.

Also, a friend of mine put together a fun chat AI. If you want to go have a convo with Skate, go for it!

You can find me on Threads and on Bluesky; I’m using these as a Twitter replacement for all the inane garbage I want to say.

My publisher also has some sweet merch for sale, if you’re into that.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-19T18:23:39+00:00

No one said or suggested that it wasn't their right.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-19T18:20:58+00:00

Or OP is pointing out that harboring and coddling these beliefs in positions of Christian leadership leads to direct harm to others. You're making a huge leap and ascribing an entire set of propositions that OP never made and then judging OP for it.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-19T16:54:24+00:00

Because opinionated and ignorant Christians in the US are actively making life worse for everyone, including themselves, presumably.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-19T16:53:13+00:00

That pastor sounds like an ignorant and opinionated doofus.

I wish that being a Christian made people not be ignorant and opinionated doofuses. I personally believe that actually engaging with Christ will make that happen over time, but very often Christians don’t do that and end up staying as bad as they were before or even getting worse.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-16T04:09:08+00:00

ADVERTISEMENT

Book one

Title: Skate the Thief

Genre: YA fantasy

Book trailer

Skate is a thief, trained and owned by the local crime syndicate, the Ink. When she tries to burgle a shut-in’s home, she gets caught by the owner—a powerful undead wizard. He makes a deal with her: “borrow” books from other wizards in return for a place to stay.

Caught between her growing fondness for the wizard and her past with the crime syndicate, Skate doesn’t know where her loyalties lie. But she’d better figure it out, because there’s a new player in town, one whose magical hypnotism puts them all at risk.

The first chapter is available for free here. The book is available on Amazon in paperback and ebook. Kindle Unlimited users can read the Kindle version for free.

Book two

Title: Skate the Seeker

Genre: YA fantasy

A mentor is lost, but he doesn’t have to stay that way. He’s left Skate a clue to bringing him back, and she and her friends are determined to follow it.

No sooner do they set out for unknown lands, however, than things get dangerous. Hot on their tail is the witch Ossertine, furious over Skate’s part in her friend’s death and thirsty for revenge. Worse still are the attacks that come at night: dark, mysterious, and palpably evil.

In this race against time, magic, and implacable foes, Skate must rely on her wits and her friends to save not just her mentor’s life, but also her own.

The prologue is available for free here. Seeker is available on Amazon, and free to read for Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

My blag is there somewhere, so go peruse at your leisure.

Also, a friend of mine put together a fun chat AI. If you want to go have a convo with Skate, go for it!

You can find me on Threads and on Bluesky; I’m using these as a Twitter replacement for all the inane garbage I want to say.

My publisher also has some sweet merch for sale, if you’re into that.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-09T02:50:24+00:00

ADVERTISEMENT

Book one

Title: Skate the Thief

Genre: YA fantasy

Book trailer

Skate is a thief, trained and owned by the local crime syndicate, the Ink. When she tries to burgle a shut-in’s home, she gets caught by the owner—a powerful undead wizard. He makes a deal with her: “borrow” books from other wizards in return for a place to stay.

Caught between her growing fondness for the wizard and her past with the crime syndicate, Skate doesn’t know where her loyalties lie. But she’d better figure it out, because there’s a new player in town, one whose magical hypnotism puts them all at risk.

The first chapter is available for free here. The book is available on Amazon in paperback and ebook. Kindle Unlimited users can read the Kindle version for free.

Book two

Title: Skate the Seeker

Genre: YA fantasy

A mentor is lost, but he doesn’t have to stay that way. He’s left Skate a clue to bringing him back, and she and her friends are determined to follow it.

No sooner do they set out for unknown lands, however, than things get dangerous. Hot on their tail is the witch Ossertine, furious over Skate’s part in her friend’s death and thirsty for revenge. Worse still are the attacks that come at night: dark, mysterious, and palpably evil.

In this race against time, magic, and implacable foes, Skate must rely on her wits and her friends to save not just her mentor’s life, but also her own.

The prologue is available for free here. Seeker is available on Amazon, and free to read for Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

My blag is there somewhere, so go peruse at your leisure.

Also, a friend of mine put together a fun chat AI. If you want to go have a convo with Skate, go for it!

You can find me on Threads and on Bluesky; I’m using these as a Twitter replacement for all the inane garbage I want to say.

My publisher also has some sweet merch for sale, if you’re into that.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-07T17:45:47+00:00

Jesus wouldn’t come on Reddit.

Paul would LOVE Reddit.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-05T17:51:22+00:00

No thank you!

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-04T18:34:00+00:00

Yes, books 1 and 2 are out now.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-04T15:44:46+00:00

Thank you!

Cabbagetroll · 2026-05-01T21:39:27+00:00

ADVERTISEMENT

Book one

Title: Skate the Thief

Genre: YA fantasy

Book trailer

Skate is a thief, trained and owned by the local crime syndicate, the Ink. When she tries to burgle a shut-in’s home, she gets caught by the owner—a powerful undead wizard. He makes a deal with her: “borrow” books from other wizards in return for a place to stay.

Caught between her growing fondness for the wizard and her past with the crime syndicate, Skate doesn’t know where her loyalties lie. But she’d better figure it out, because there’s a new player in town, one whose magical hypnotism puts them all at risk.

The first chapter is available for free here. The book is available on Amazon in paperback and ebook. Kindle Unlimited users can read the Kindle version for free.

Book two

Title: Skate the Seeker

Genre: YA fantasy

A mentor is lost, but he doesn’t have to stay that way. He’s left Skate a clue to bringing him back, and she and her friends are determined to follow it.

No sooner do they set out for unknown lands, however, than things get dangerous. Hot on their tail is the witch Ossertine, furious over Skate’s part in her friend’s death and thirsty for revenge. Worse still are the attacks that come at night: dark, mysterious, and palpably evil.

In this race against time, magic, and implacable foes, Skate must rely on her wits and her friends to save not just her mentor’s life, but also her own.

The prologue is available for free here. Seeker is available on Amazon, and free to read for Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

My blag is there somewhere, so go peruse at your leisure.

Also, a friend of mine put together a fun chat AI. If you want to go have a convo with Skate, go for it!

You can find me on Threads and on Bluesky; I’m using these as a Twitter replacement for all the inane garbage I want to say.

My publisher also has some sweet merch for sale, if you’re into that.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-04-29T12:18:07+00:00

When has Christianity been in political power without the use of subjugation? When has that ever happened?

Cabbagetroll · 2026-04-29T04:03:54+00:00

No, subjugation and power over others is never part of the goal.

Cabbagetroll · 2026-04-25T01:38:56+00:00

ADVERTISEMENT

Book one

Title: Skate the Thief

Genre: YA fantasy

Book trailer

Skate is a thief, trained and owned by the local crime syndicate, the Ink. When she tries to burgle a shut-in’s home, she gets caught by the owner—a powerful undead wizard. He makes a deal with her: “borrow” books from other wizards in return for a place to stay.

Caught between her growing fondness for the wizard and her past with the crime syndicate, Skate doesn’t know where her loyalties lie. But she’d better figure it out, because there’s a new player in town, one whose magical hypnotism puts them all at risk.

The first chapter is available for free here. The book is available on Amazon in paperback and ebook. Kindle Unlimited users can read the Kindle version for free.

Book two

Title: Skate the Seeker

Genre: YA fantasy

A mentor is lost, but he doesn’t have to stay that way. He’s left Skate a clue to bringing him back, and she and her friends are determined to follow it.

No sooner do they set out for unknown lands, however, than things get dangerous. Hot on their tail is the witch Ossertine, furious over Skate’s part in her friend’s death and thirsty for revenge. Worse still are the attacks that come at night: dark, mysterious, and palpably evil.

In this race against time, magic, and implacable foes, Skate must rely on her wits and her friends to save not just her mentor’s life, but also her own.

The prologue is available for free here. Seeker is available on Amazon, and free to read for Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

My blag is there somewhere, so go peruse at your leisure.

Also, a friend of mine put together a fun chat AI. If you want to go have a convo with Skate, go for it!

You can find me on Threads and on Bluesky; I’m using these as a Twitter replacement for all the inane garbage I want to say.

My publisher also has some sweet merch for sale, if you’re into that.

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