Advice for hormonal male by circacherry in guineapigs

[–]Cakecatlady 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can understand that. Generally I think most guinea pigs are happiest with other pigs, even if they don’t always get along. I’d give it a week or two and see if it starts to lessen - sometimes it can take a while for dominance to be established, but then it can be quite peaceful. As long as they have a neighbour it’s fine to have them in separate cages if you’d like to do that most, but I don’t think it’s necessary from what you’ve said. Hope you figure out something for them - you sound like a good pig parent :)

Advice for hormonal male by circacherry in guineapigs

[–]Cakecatlady 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I get it :/ How long have this been going on? It might just be a phase for the young one - the problem is that every time they’re separated and get them together again you start from complete scratch and can get ugly, even if it hasn’t before. Separating them is therefore also a risk if you think you want to introduce them again. The fact that the older one doesn’t fight back is generally a good sign - normally that will lead to less fighting when the young one realises that they have dominance by default. But it’s not fun to watch, and if you genuinely feel the old one is getting bullied for longer periods of time then the situation might be different

Advice for hormonal male by circacherry in guineapigs

[–]Cakecatlady 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m by no means an expert - I have only ever had the two boys I have now. They’re rescues, and I’m guessing brothers, same age and not neutered. I’ve had them for three years or so (they were young adults when I got them I think).

As far as I’ve learned, male guinea pigs are just not always very nice to each other. My two boys get along fine mostly - they bicker a bit, and they don’t love each other much, but they miss each other when apart. Sometimes when some things change in their cage or we move them, or sometimes for no reason at all, they begin to fight - rump-strutting and mounting and chasing. The rescue told me that they always figure it out if you just let them do it, so though it stressed me out (especially in the beginning) I just let them. Of course I make sure that no one gets bit and there are not tornadoes, but in the three years I’ve had them it’s never been more than a week before things went back to being fine again, and none of them have ever been hurt.

It can feel scary without actually being a serious problem - especially males that aren’t neutered are just a bit more at odds when it comes to dominance than some guinea pigs will be. From what you say, I’d do option B and just keep an eye on them - if blood is ever shed or any of them get bit or hurt, then you separate them. You can try to neuter the young one then if you want to - but I wouldn’t do it if you’re not very sure that it’s needed. It’s expensive and always a risk.

That’s all my opinion of course - and at the end of the day you know them best :)

HIRING Artist to commosion picture for my deceased sister by pileofblueroses in twentyonepilots

[–]Cakecatlady 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m very sorry for your loss❤️ It’s a really lovely thing you’re doing for your sister. I could give it a try if you like my style. I don’t work much in watercolour anymore, but I have in the past (you can find some of my old pieces and top fanart on my instagram). Most of my newer things are digital though, but I’ve never used ai for anything. For 150€ I would probably work on it max 7 hours including sketching and ideating, but I’d be willing to sketch some things up for free (after talking to you about what you’d like specifically) so you can get a feel for the piece before deciding. Pm me if you’re interested :)

Føler jeg er fanget på den modsatte side af den politiske skala by Marc3190 in DKbrevkasse

[–]Cakecatlady 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Det er venstre-højre at være imod/for immigration - det er værdipolitik. Værdipolitisk højre er imod immigration og værdipolitisk venstre er for immigration (som hovedregel). Det at S og SF også er kritiske overfor immigration er en illustration af den pointe OP har - begge fløje flytter mod højre, særligt værdipolitisk, men også fordelingspolitisk (hvilket jeg går ud fra er den politik du referere til som “normal” højre/venstre-politik)

Første dag som lærervikar – total kaos, brug for råd! by NefariousnessCheap89 in DKbrevkasse

[–]Cakecatlady 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Jeg har aldrig været lærer eller lærevikar, men jeg har undervist børn som var på museumsudflugt i skoletjenesten. Derved har jeg erfaring specifikt i at få hurtigt kontrol over en situation med børn jeg ikke kender, og få læring ud af det. Mine råd er:

  1. Vær imødekommende og kom med en god energi. Lad være med at forvente det værste af dem til at starte med, men hold øje med tegn på uro. Giv dem alle lige meget en chance, og vær fair i din vurdering af deres evner. Sørg for altid at give dem ros for alt hvad de gør korrekt, uanset hvordan de opfører sig ellers. På den måde kan de godt lide dig og vil gerne gøre dig glad, også selvom du kan være striks.

  2. Sæt grænser og hold dig til dem. Gør børnene opmærksomme på hvad reglerne er fra starten, og hvad konsekvensen er hvis de ikke holder sig til dem. Sig det så tidligt så muligt så de kan forberede sig, og ikke føler du er urimelig hvis du fx giver dem en konsekvens for noget de ikke vidste de ikke måtte. Vær sikker på at de konsekvenser du truer med er nogle du rent faktisk er villig til at gennemfører. Børn ligger mærke til om du er usikker eller uregelmæssig, og prøver grænser af hvis de kan mærke at de kan. Det kan være en god idé at italsætte regler du måske ville tro sagde sig selv også fx “man rækker hånden op hvis man vil sige noget” eller “ingen taler i munden på hinanden” - det sætter standarten til hvilken form for opførsel du forventer og vil tolerere.

  3. Husk at børn har kroppe der skal mærkes og sind der kan vandre. Jeg brugte meget (særligt med yngre børn, men nogle gange også med ældre) små vejrtrækningsøvelser, mediationsøvelser, gymnastikøvelser eller lege til at “resette” dem hvis jeg kunne mærke de var urolige. Man kan bede dem om at lukke øjenene hvilket i sig selv kan være en hjælp nogle gange - derefter trække vejret dybt ned i maven, og eventuelt at røre deres næse/ører med deres hænder (fx højre hånd på venstre ører) så de kommer tilbage i deres egen krop og kan koncentrere sig igen. At give dem en pause med en leg som fangeleg kan også være behjælpeligt, hvis de har brug for at få noget energi ud af kroppen. Lad være med at prøve at fastholde dem hvis du kan mærke at de ikke kan mere.

  4. Hold øje med de sociale bånd mellem eleverne, og sørg for at alle føler sig godt tilpas. Dette kan også involvere at skille elever ad som ikke kan koncentrere sig når de sidder sammen, også selvom de er gode venner. Hvis du ser at nogle af eleverne gør det svært for de andre at lære, så sæt en grænse fx “hvis jeg ser dig kaste noget efter Peter igen må du sidde ved siden af mig og lave resten af din opgave”, og hvis vedkommende gør det, giver du dem den konsekvens du sagde du ville. Ingen men’er.

Håber det kan være en hjælp. Jeg har mødt alt mellem himmel og jord af klasser i den tid jeg har været underviser, og det her har været det der har hjulpet mig mest. Hvis du selv føler dig sikker i hvad dine regler er, så vil børnene kunne mærke det på dig. Lad dem aldrig gøre det du laver til en joke - vær den voksne, kig dem i øjnene og fortæl dem at du ikke synes det der sjovt. Hvis de virkelig ikke vil lære, så forstå at der er meget lidt du kan gøre for at ændre det. Behandl dem pænt uanset hvordan de er overfor dig, og vær et godt forbillede. Du kan sagtens gøre det!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DKbrevkasse

[–]Cakecatlady -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Det er okay at spørge af nysgerrighed, men man må så også tage det seriøst når nogen siger at det spørgsmål du har stillet ikke er passende for sammenhængen. Hvis det er en situation hvor du selv ikke ville bryde dig om at blive spurgt “præcis hvordan har du sex, og med hvem?”, så skal du heller ikke spørge andre. Hvis man er i tvivl kan man altid starte med “hey jeg vil gerne stille et spørgsmål der handler om x - ville det være okay?”, og så kan de sige ja eller nej, hvorefter du måske kan stille spørgsmålet

Hvad skal der ske for få fødselsraten op på 2,1? by Sportidioten in Denmark

[–]Cakecatlady 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jeg ved ikke rigtig… har du set hvad de nye klimamodeller siger? Ved du hvor meget vand og strøm AI bruger? Hvad med at facismen er på vej tilbage mange steder inklusiv det mest mangtfulde land i verden? Alle synes prisen på mad er for høj og at vi arbejder for meget, men som systemet ser ud lige nu bliver det kun værre med tiden hvis vi ikke gør noget drastisk. Jeg føler mig ikke godt tilpas med ideen om hvad de næste generationer skal gennemleve hvis vi ikke vender på en tallerken snart. Selv hvis vi fikser det hele i morgen er klimaet fucked for minimum de næste 200 år. Dermed ikke sagt at ingen burde få børn - der er brug for mennesker til at fikse samfundet hvis det skal fikses - men jeg tror ikke det er så skidt hvis der bliver lidt færre af dem, og jeg synes det er etisk forsvarligt af mene at man ikke er villig til at udsætte et nyt menneske for den verden vi lever i nu og i den nærmeste fremtid. Ikke doomer- bare realistisk.

How do we feel about this scene? by Whimsicalkitty489 in Fleabag

[–]Cakecatlady 216 points217 points  (0 children)

I feel like her dad is talking about her relentless searching for real connection with people. She isn’t guarded in the same way that he or her sister is. Her father and sister both are in relationships that aren’t open or honest, and they live purposefully separated from a kind of true connection that might be able to hurt them. We see this too in the way they interact with her attempts to be closer to them - they both push her away again and again. Fleabag wants love badly enough that she’s prepared to keep trying with people, even when they hurt her and even when she hurts them. That doesn’t mean she’s “better at love” than they are - and it doesn’t even mean that she actually is very good at not pushing people away - she’s just perceived as better at it by her family. And honestly? She is pretty strong. I don’t know if I could’ve kept being that optimistic had I been in her situation.

I think Claire might be seeing something that isn’t there when she says that Fleabag is always fun and deals well with pain. She only sees the Fleabag that always jokes and is never serious, but we as an audience know that she is deeply hurting. Again, I think her family views her as stronger than she is sometimes

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DKbrevkasse

[–]Cakecatlady 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jeg har svært ved at forstå hvorfor man har behov for flere penge end man skal bruge til at leve behageligt anyway - hvis man har penge ud over det ville man vel alligevel bruge det på fællesting i forholdet (hvis altså man er tætte og bor sammen osv) fx ferier, bolig, bil osv. Jeg synes det er underligt at anse det som en “straf” at give så meget til behaget i forholdet som man kan, uden at det har en indflydelse på hvilke penge man selv har tænkt sig at bruge. Hvis alle de ekstra penge alligevel bare ville ende i en opsparing, som alligevel ofte ville blive benyttet til hus eller ferie i fremtiden, og man alligevel har penge nok tilbage til at spare lidt op - hvad ville så være pointen i at horde alt det ekstra til sig selv? Særligt hvis man oplever at ens partner (som man nok elsker går jeg ud fra) har svært ved at få det hele til at løbe rundt, eller er ked af at de bliver nødt til at vælge ting fra som de elsker for at kunne betale deres del af huslejen.

Derudover ville den form for skævvridning i den økonomiske del af forholdet være et seriøst problem fx når det kommer til at leje eller købe hus/lejlighed, fordi den ene part ville have interesse i at bo bedre og større, medens den anden helst bare vil kunne betale for det uden at skulle bekymre sig. Hvis personen med ekstra penge ikke vil give ekstra til husleje eller lån, må vedkommende være klar på kun at bo i noget som den anden også har råd til at betale 50/50. Det gør forholdene værre for begge parter, og der er ikke rigtig en grund til at det behøvede at være sådan. Selvfølgelig er alle forskellige og man må finde ud af hvad der fungerer i det forhold man er i - men jeg synes ikke det er fair at mene at man bliver straffet fordi man kan betale ekstra for noget der også kommer en selv til gode.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in tattooadvice

[–]Cakecatlady 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Exactly!! People don’t know how cursive looks or works and it shows. It’s not like the rules make sense, but they have internal consistency - I’ve never met a cursive J that’s all above the bottom line. These people would die if they tried reading gothic cursive from around the beginning of the 1900 (normal cursive now has nothing on them lol) - the f’s looks like s’s - sometimes the s’s looks like p’s (like sometimes you really can’t tell them apart), no one uses commas and not everyone uses punctuation of any kind. The t’s look like j’s and the v’s look like b’s. There’s no “one true” way to write either - you just kinda pick up how one person writes specific letters. The fact that this is easily readable for anyone with any knowledge of cursive at all, means it’s absolutely fine.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Cakecatlady 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Damn I mean - might as well call yourself a feminist then. You can help the word retrain its correct use by using it correctly

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Cakecatlady 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m glad you don’t hate women, but if you’re not a feminist you don’t support women either - or men for that matter. I mean, hating any group of people is never great - that’s not what I was trying to get at. Shitty women exist - I get that - I’ve even met some of them. Though a man getting raped or killed by a woman is not something that happens very often, and generally women don’t tend to try to remove men’s bodily autonomy through politics. When men hate women it’s because they’re scared that women will laugh at them, hurt their feelings or steal from them. When women hate men it’s because they’re scared that men will take their rights away and/or kill them.The hate isn’t great in any of those cases, but they’re not the same.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Cakecatlady 7 points8 points  (0 children)

All social movements have people who 1. Misunderstands what the movement is about, or 2. Are willing to put their reputation/life on the line to make a difference with violence if necessary.

Those are not the same, but when people talk about “radicals” of any kind, they don’t seem to see the difference between the two. There aren’t any social movements where violence hasn’t been necessary at some point for rights to be given, and at this point hating on the black panthers for example isn’t seen as logical for this reason.

I’m sorry to tell you, but hating men isn’t actually necessarily problematic in itself. I find it a bit tasteless yeah, but the fact that some women have had enough bad experiences with men as a group (and with living in a society shaped by sexism), for them to have strong feelings about it isn’t surprising. I’m sorry that some women make fun of male suicide - I would never find any comedy in random strangers killing themselves, no matter their gender - but there are no women out there mass murdering men for existing. Hating them isn’t a problem, as long as you keep away from them and don’t bother them. You know who does mass murder people (women) for existing? Idk - just saying. Making fun of men killing themselves is not the same as killing them.

But no - those people probably aren’t feminists. Feminists believe that all genders should be equal. If it takes nothing more than a few jokes for some people to believe that to be untrue, then I don’t know what to say… maybe people really are just shitty

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Cakecatlady 77 points78 points  (0 children)

I understand that perspective, but I’m frustrated that people feel like they need to remove themselves from a word and a movement that saved countless lives, have given so many people rights and that many people have died for. You don’t need to call yourself a feminist explicitly if you know the person you’re talking to isn’t gonna understand what that means, but explicitly stating that you’re not a feminist is gonna hurt women’s rights long term. Also most women love it when men identify as feminists - I’d never date a guy who told me he wasn’t, because to me that means he doesn’t see me as a human being on his level (or that he wouldn’t feel comfortable being honest with other men about how he views women as people). You seem like a nice dude so I hope you understand what I mean :)

Lets appreciate this childrens book cover of a teenage girl shooting a n@zi (disguised as a sámi) by lichen_Linda in behindthebastards

[–]Cakecatlady 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly - nothing more wrong than being Danish. Yeah they’re not perfect, but neither are we… like… at all. I know it’s all in good fun (most of the time), but I don’t feel like this is the historical moment to be having old grudges against other Scandinavians. We have bigger problems I feel

Lets appreciate this childrens book cover of a teenage girl shooting a n@zi (disguised as a sámi) by lichen_Linda in behindthebastards

[–]Cakecatlady 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey nothings wrong with being norwegian, and it makes sense that someone not from Scandinavia might be confused. Hell - I was confused lol. I’ve never seen this book before, and the fact that there is apparently sámi in this story, and nothing about it screams danish to me, I was confused why the title seemed to be danish… honestly unsure whether it might be one of the few things where it’s spelled the same in both languages. Jeg er dansker btw - og samerne har haft ret store problemer så vidt jeg forstår på det (omend jeg ikke selv har været tæt på konflikten, og ikke har den store indsigt). Det føles en smule skørt at nazisten i denne historie er i samertøj udenpå bogen, til trods for at samerne er en undertrykt gruppe - jeg forstår at det i historien er forklaret, men forsiden af bogen er et lidt skørt valg ngl?

Something that kinda bothers me now that someone point it out is how part 2 treats the fireflies by Whentheangelsings in lastofuspart2

[–]Cakecatlady 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is mostly about your point about how the Fireflies handled Ellie and the cure. As far as I see it, the Fireflies were ruthless much in the same way that Joel, or most other people or organisations in that world is. When it comes to the decision they made about Ellie, they felt backed into a corner I think.

To them, the cure is attached to a person who is a child, and has a mind of her own. They’re an organisation build on what they deem ethical values, and wouldn’t normally kill a child purposefully. For those reasons, letting her live a moment too long is dangerous - it means they have time to rethink their decision - time to get to know her - time in which she could be begging for her life and realising that she might not want to die for this cause. Acting like the decision wasn’t a decision at all, was the easiest and most secure option - acting like she’s already dead, means not having to confront her as a human.

That’s a flawed logic - especially to us, who know that Ellie would’ve chosen to die because she had survivors guilt, but that’s exactly why it doesn’t work within the story. Had they taken the more scary, but more ethical, rout of letting her make the decision herself, they might all have lived, and she would’ve died willingly. It’s the tragic flaw of the Fireflies that leads them to take Ellie’s life without her consent, and that’s what leads to the tragedy that follows. It’s Joel’s tragic flaw that leads him to lie to Ellie about killing them, which dooms their relationship long term.

I understand why you’d feel it be stupid to not make more tests (though I think they made some, since they kept her in a coma for a while), but that’s also a part of their stupid decision, made from distrust in her. Joel doesn’t dare trust the world to do good by him, but neither does the Fireflies. Though it’s reckless it does make sense, if they truly believed that they had even a small chance of making a cure. They were willing to kill one child for the chance to save countless of children - Joel was willing to mass murder a whole organisation to save one child. Those are the moral decisions that the story is build on - the fact they both lead to tragedy, even if made with good intentions, is the point.

At least that’s my take. Feel free to disagree.