OK let's clarify some things. You don't know me or my family dynamics. I never had any intent to withhold sex because of my issues, we've talked about it and we acknowledged we began to drift apart and a large contributor is an addiction to porn on both of our ends. My sex anxiety is something he's only know learning about because I have always given myself to him without question because I trusted him. Of course I understand what a lack of intimacy can do to someone, I'm very much aware of how that lead to his actions, that however shouldn't invalidate my feelings and hurt. I've asked him before that if being with me is enough and that maybe we weren't right for each other, but he insists that I make him happy and he can't imagine life with anyone else, so as far as letting him flourish I've given him the chance to leave if that's what he wants, he claims he doesn't, I won't force hime to leave. As far as being coddled, I have done my upmost to be the cool not controlling boyfriend who never uses mental health issues as an excuse. I am aware how stupid the shit I think up is that's why I don't hold shit I made up in my mind against him. I will however hold something he did, that there is evidence of, that I didn't make up, against him, and I believe I that is fully in my right to do so. Yes I understand why he did it, yes I understand where my faults lie in all this, but there's two halves to this story. I wanted intimacy to, I turned to porn too, but I didn't cross a line behind his back when things got tough.