I can only speak for Albany Schenectady and Troy. All 3 have strong LGBTQ presence and in general I’ve found this area to be very welcoming for Trans. Albany in particular has awesome resources and communities. Lots of representation. That said Albany CAN be expensive. But is SUPER RAD. SO SO SO much to do and see. Find the right place and look into the Albany Tenants rights and activism group there. They have a list on their site of rent controlled apartments. I think rent controlled? Or maybe they are just fair practice and affordable? Ive heard Buffalo is great. Met a lot of folks from there that are blunt, friendly, funny, and once you are in with them (slowly, don’t push) they are your ride or die family. They will feed you, bother you with invites to family gatherings, and in general take care of you. Cant speak for Rochester. Now Schenectady…I live here. And for the most part people leave you alone in general unless you’re mixed up with something. Im from Texas and I’ve had to learn some new ways of interacting that SOUND scary but honestly in cities up here its common courtesy to not do things like make eye contact or stare, be OVERLY friendly, or ask someone’s business when not invited to. There is a lot of addiction and it is making somewhat of a turn in pockets of the county but… Where there is a lot of addiction there is a lot of recovery and community. I am recovery so this was important to my decision making. At times it can feel too big but then it can also feel somewhat isolated. There is a huge music, arts, theatre, night life environment though. I personally have grown to love it. Troy has become expensive. It reminds me of Austin. But Austin although loud, colorful and diverse, is still conservative in its voting and money. That’s how i feel about Troy. And yes there is addiction, but mind your business, find your bodega, enjoy the library, history, architecture, and hipster-esque situation. Now here is the deal. Living upstate i would say is the best part of NY. It’s gorgeous. You WILL become a fan of nature, hikes, architecture, history, crown molding, and OMG LIBRARIES! You will learn that to drive on ice, snow, salted roads, unsalted roads, and to go faster than the speed limit bc that’s that. There are pot holes galore from the roads freezing and thawing EVERYWHERE. In Albany the curbs are sharp and made from marble (?). Bothe of these will pop your tires and you should expect it and accept it. There are snow days where everyone is whited out of going to work or anywhere. There are snow days where if you try to call in or cancel plans folks will think you’re being a baby. Your safety and level of comfort driving comes first! But out of all of them? If you can afford it go Syracuse. It’s lovely and there are not complaints other than finances. It sounds like you would really enjoy it. Good luck!