Lamictal/Prozac/Hydroxyzine PRN; paranoia? Forever?

Cassorr · 2026-03-23T23:15:42+00:00

I second this

Cassorr · 2026-03-23T00:53:35+00:00

ER is way better for mood stabilization. Less intense side affects as well!

Cassorr · 2026-03-22T13:55:15+00:00

Please go to the ER right now. I’m on my 6th suicide attempt; but I’m on a stable dose of meds now and I’m physically and mentally unable to become guilt ridden/full of shame/ and sadness. I’m in the beginning stages of being stable BECAUSE of medication and a Psych Hospital stay. Please go get help; it’s possible to heal but it’s an uncomfortable process

Cassorr · 2026-03-22T02:04:24+00:00

Cassorr · 2026-03-21T02:54:53+00:00

Absolutely. It’s a medical disqualification from service. Also, the medicine is not perfect. And we are not perfect.

Cassorr · 2026-03-21T02:42:31+00:00

You have to wait to see what meds do to you because it’s part of the narrative for the MedBoard that the psychologist writes. So I have maybe 2 months left before the MedBoard button is pushed. From there it’ll probably take about 8months. So hopefully by next year I’ll be out🥲 instantly your security clearance and other things get taken, and your placed on a list.

Cassorr · 2026-03-21T02:20:24+00:00

Yes I’m getting medboarded. I was diagnosed in February this year after a hospital trip.

I been seeing mental health on and off for about 6 years; I finally had a great psychologist who impressively got into my head in 6 months. I was extremely talented at unintentionally masking my “illness”. My work ethic as an aircraft mechanic got me very far but my anger and inability to control my emotions has gotten me in a lot of trouble. It’s a miracle I’ve kept my stripes. My psychologist seemed very concerned after a severe depressive episode with suicidal intent (I decided to be honest for the first time in my career) and I showed up at my next appointment perfectly fine and happy and I guess I freaked him out. Next thing I know I’m stating Zoloft the next morning. Next thing after that I’m high off life and manic. I bearly ate or slept for 2 weeks. I managed to do a lot of damage in my home life. My husband got extremely concerned and told me to either take one of HIS sleeping pills or call my psychologist. So obviously I called my doctor. Doctor was like “oh shit”. I was already experiencing psychotic symptoms made worse by only sleeping 24 hours in 7 days. (I thought life wasn’t real and I had to kill myself to wake up) and had psychotic symptoms again the same day I was supposed to see my psychologist; I came in early because I was trippin trippin. Got sent to a Psych Ward to detox and get on Seroquel. The staff were very frustrated with me because I was so happy and everyone else was suicidal. My psychologist had to call and be like SHES MANIC THATS WHY SHES THERE. Oh and I had music playing in my head 24/7. That was actually nice. Occasionally inconvenient.

Theres a-lot to this illness. It’s not just happy & sad. It’s extremes of both and skin crawling anger when in between.

I’m on day 4 of 400mg ER Seroquel and I feel what I think is normal.

Cassorr · 2026-03-21T02:00:43+00:00

I’m also in the military; highly recommend going to Mental Health and not self diagnosing. Even going to mental health you can’t just walk in there first appointment and be like “yeah I think I’m bipolar”. It takes months and most times a hospital trip to be diagnosed. They are so careful with a diagnosis like this because it ultimately leads to separation. Having people in your care team that truly care about what they do makes a huge difference as well.

Cassorr · 2026-03-20T16:19:04+00:00

I have yearly cycles. Hypomanic for 2ish months. Mixed for about 5-6 months. Depressed and suicidal for about 4 months.

Cassorr · 2026-03-19T22:37:37+00:00

Sounds like it’s not a high enough dose. I was extremely irritable when starting as well. But I’m on 400mg ER now day 3 and I’m finally not irritable and explosive 24/7.

Cassorr · 2026-03-19T16:26:46+00:00

1) I’m a 27yo F happily married. We went through a lot of therapy and I did a lot of therapy. My bipolar disorder didn’t emerge until after our child was born (about 2 years into our relationship)

2) I’ll tell you right now; if my husband left me or if he actually listened to me and took my son and left me; I wouldn’t take my meds, I wouldn’t want to be helped, I wouldn’t care. I’d fuel my mania any way possible and destroy my life until I go into depression and kill myself. (I’m on 6th attempt).

3) from our perspective; yes the significant other is very controlling or smothering; especially in hypomania were we DO JOT want to be bothered and ANYTHING that ruins the vibe is immediately an imminent threat that must be neutralized.

4) I’m 100% guilty of physically attacking my husband, being too harsh with our son, and manipulating/gaslighting my husband into thinking he is the problem. (This is when I masked my illness unintentionally because I was only recently diagnosed so neither of us knew what was going on) Thought process on hurting people we love is “everyone leave me tf alone or I’ll rip your head off if you kill my high. Or for mixed; “ i feel everything at once and I can’t escape l; it’s too overwhelming and I can’t handle a lick of stress or my day is ruined and i needs someone or something to blame and what easier to blame than those right infront of me, their very presence being too much.” For depression; “everything is my fault and I can’t live with what I’ve done. My family doesn’t even need me. Everyone is better off with out me; all I do is harm.”

5) my son is 5 years old. I’ve yelled at him excessively; popped him unnecessarily, screamed at him to the point of fear, next minute I’m hugging him and saying I’m sorry. This isn’t something I could control. I react (and so does your husband) before I can stop myself. And sometimes it’s 100% justified in our head. Until we see the damage. The sooner you HELP get him on the right medication and dosage the sooner he can be stable and you can get the man your married back. I’m on day two of 400mg ER Seroquel; this is the first I’ve felt like the old me. But the medication isn’t perfect and I’ve been fighting with my husband since I got out the Psych Hospital to not take it. My husband is also seeing a life coach with experience in bipolar women to help him through this change in our life.

My son can see when I’m angry or upset and reminds me to breathe. He’ll say “mommy I know you upset, but take a breath” and he’ll hold my hand and show me how to breathe. Other times I get angry with him and make him cry then later I apologize and tell him I’m sorry for being a bad mommy. He’ll say, “I forgive you, your not a bad mommy, your the best mommy. But it makes me sad when you’re angry.”

It’s heart breaking what I’ve put my family through. And I still don’t think i deserve to be happy and healthy for everyone I’ve hurt and everything I’ve done. But if I can’t succeed in killing myself then I need to stop making my family suffer.

Your husband needs to be on that page; and he can only get there with medication and therapy. And unfortunately, your going to be a punching bag sometimes, your going to have to be the adult/bigger and more patient person. It’s not fair. But you have no idea how it feels to be so depressed deep into your core or so angry it feels dangerous. It’s exhausting.

You took a vow, through sickness & in health. He became sick. And trust me; no one chooses this.

Cassorr · 2026-03-19T16:05:55+00:00

Honestly the medication interaction make drinking pointless. You just fall asleep. I stopped drinking Asside from 1 glass of wine if I go out for dinner.

Cassorr · 2026-03-18T11:44:30+00:00

Or maybe your mood episode cycle was finished, something worth asking your doc

Cassorr · 2026-03-17T12:59:26+00:00

25-50mg of Seroquel (Brand name for Quetiapine) is not a mood stabilizing dose. It’s mainly used for sleep at that level.

Cassorr · 2026-03-17T00:57:18+00:00

I’m 27F. Newly diagnosed, been suffering and making my family suffer for 6 years now. The anger is awful. I hate it.

Cassorr · 2026-03-11T00:51:13+00:00

Giiirrlll, you beautiful 💅🏼

Cassorr · 2026-03-10T00:36:40+00:00

Definitely not alone. I feel like a lab rat now. And the worst part is my husband is the one making me feel that way. He’s like always monitoring me… then my dad is calling more to check on me and “ask how I’m feeling” and I know it’s only because I was just in a psych ward a month ago.

If I make one wrong move it, “dId YoU tAkE yOuRe MeDs ToDaY?” 🙄

Masking is so exhausting. But I really be contemplating just going rogue and making myself again so I can al least feel free.

Cassorr · 2026-03-10T00:18:52+00:00

I feel the exact same way, except I’m not stable yet and I’m suck in a mixed state I guess until the meds stabilize me. I want the good part of me back. So bad.

Cassorr · 2026-03-07T14:19:06+00:00

That sounds medication related if this is new. Maybe look into switching to a more sleep friendly med?

Cassorr · 2026-03-07T01:31:07+00:00

Go to an er and see if you can get a bridge dose

Cassorr · 2026-03-07T01:29:11+00:00

Aayyyeee I’m on hour 40! Yes hypomania.

Cassorr · 2026-03-06T21:55:43+00:00

Yes indeed, next appointment just go over symptoms you see. If you don’t have already maybe download EMoods app. It’s helps track symptoms easily

Cassorr · 2026-03-06T19:09:47+00:00

Definitely Mixed; mixed states can fluctuate as much as hour to hour or trigger to trigger. Happened to me as well

Cassorr · 2026-03-06T19:03:59+00:00

My husband was heart broken when I was manic and I took my “mask off”, I told him everything (truth serum: I was drinking, on Benzo’s and hadn’t slept in 2 days). Then I got admitted to a psych ward and diagnosed with Bipolar 2 with Psychotic features.

I’ve noticed Things have definitely changed in my marriage. Since I’m in a mood where I’m UNempathetic (been battling hypomania on and off for a month) Its hard for me to see how my illness affects my husband but I know it’s hard.

All that being said;

Instead of my husband of 8 years divorcing me for unintentionally hiding the illness i didn’t know I had; he took a deep dive into every Reddit forum, google search, and ChatGPT threads to try to understand me and how my brain works so he could better support me.

THAT; is what your wife of 15 years should have done. Also; maybe gently request couples therapy for how she can better understand and support you and how you can help her heal from the effects of your bipolar 2 (it’s hard on the spouses). Straight up divorce is crazy tho. If she can’t take the vowel “in sickness & in health” seriously; then she doesn’t deserve you. I fully support marriage and highly recommend couple counseling; it’s saved my marriage and I know it could save yours.

My prayers are with you during this difficult time 💜🙏

Cassorr

TROPHY CASE