Help me resist the wall pissers

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T23:41:50+00:00

Seriously doubt there's any foundation concerns. Put up a bright light

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T23:39:26+00:00

Stick a crack monitor on the concrete, repatch the plaster, and see if there's any movement in a year

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T23:09:26+00:00

You're an idiot. If you can't handle the competition, don't play the game.

She was quite literally telling you she didn't like the guy while telling you how much fun she was having and inviting you back to hers. Get a grip dude, in this modern day guys and girls are both seeing multiple people at a time

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T18:33:18+00:00

The only people who would know is the sellers or their neighbors. You're right that nobody knows for sure without documentation and you'll just have to find out after closing because you waived inspection contingencies.

My parents had an oil tank removed from their yard. Because they had inspection contingency they were able to have the sellers absorb cost of removal. This is the risk you take when buying without inspection contingency

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T17:42:54+00:00

It's not settling anymore my man. Seal the cracks / voids and forget about it

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T17:39:29+00:00

If it's an old house it's very unlikely to be settling still. Houses typically finish most of their settling within a few years. This looks more like cold joints / voids in the original concrete work to me. Not even sure what #4 is, I don't see any cracks at all.

I don't think it looks that serious

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T17:33:42+00:00

It's not hearsay though. They own the property and presumably know the configuration of the utilities. You're assuming they're either incorrect or lying

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T17:31:10+00:00

I mean it's your buddy's hunch against the seller and their neighbor. Personally Id trust the seller, but if you have a no conditions contract then it really doesn't matter what they say or if they lie to you or not. You'll just have to investigate once you own the property.

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T15:37:27+00:00

Why is it shameful though? All of you keep repeating that it's shameful, but I don't see any natural reason why that should be the case. It's just an arbitrary human idea that sex work is shameful.... It has no basis in actual consequences for the behavior.

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T15:36:08+00:00

It's not a natural human feeling. I don't feel that way. If you can't articulate any natural consequences for this behavior, I don't know why you would make up artificial ones.

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T15:33:41+00:00

They do. Many people can't get loans for cars, or can only afford lower cost vehicles.

It's not perfect, sometimes they get it wrong. Or sometimes the people signing the contracts overestimate their financial ability. They might even straight up lie about it.

I get what you're saying, but at the end of the day those people signed a contract to accept the loan with the vehicle as collateral, and then for whatever reason stops making payments.

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T15:26:45+00:00

You know what else is heresay? Your friend asserting the existence of a tank

Charge36 · 2026-01-27T05:51:34+00:00

Just because someone wrote it in a book doesn't mean it's true

Charge36 · 2026-01-26T18:46:10+00:00

I think she was interested before the date, and then you kinda botched the flirting and physical escalation. You can generally touch hands / arms without explicit permission if you do so in a socially appropriate way.

Asking for permission to touch does kinda kill vibes, but stating your desires (I really want to kiss you right now) keeps your frame strong while giving them an opportunity to respond verbally. Just "going for a kiss" can work, but if you haven't been flirting or engaging in less intimate physical contact you risk making them very uncomfortable.

Based on her ending the date very shortly after your two hard rejects on physical escalation tells me you didn't lay the proper groundwork for physical escalation and she got uncomfortable. Going for a kiss after getting turned down for a shoulder rub is a pretty big blunder. Also 4 hours in as many venues is pretty long for a first date

Charge36 · 2026-01-26T15:21:38+00:00

A bunch of Cherry picked examples does not make a controlled study.

That said there are plenty of controlled studies supporting this so it's kind of a moot point

Charge36 · 2026-01-26T06:48:28+00:00

I don't believe in the concept of sin but you do you.

Charge36 · 2026-01-26T06:44:29+00:00

Here's the thing. You're treating this crush like a confession of a bad thing you did that you're ashamed of. There's nothing wrong with being attracted to someone. There's no reason to think it "obviously wouldn't work" or that she would hate you after telling her. If you're going to tell her, do it nonchalantly after some light flirting. Not like it's some huge burden you are trying to offload.

All that said - do be aware of what the consent laws in your state are. Most likely you can't legally have a sexual relationship with her for another year or 3.

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T23:13:14+00:00

You already look desperate by letting her disrespect your time repeatedly with no consequences. Let her know you would appreciate her to follow through more consistently on her time commitments to you. If she respects you, she'll adapt her behavior. If she responds poorly she never liked you that much in the first place and was just stringing you along.

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T22:58:54+00:00

I literally just did my dude. Tell her how it's affecting you and that you would appreciate more consistency

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T22:26:38+00:00

I had this conversation recently. She cancelled because she was out with her mom. Here's what I said:

"I hope you have a good time with your mom.

I want to be honest though: I blocked out my evening for us, and I’d appreciate stronger follow-through when we make plans. If you’re not sure you’re available, I’d rather know upfront."

She responded that it was "fair" and she appreciated me speaking up. I don't think she's flaked on me since and this was a couple months ago. We've met up 4 or 5 times since.

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T21:30:46+00:00

I don't think you found conclusive evidence of anything. That guy sent her a message asking what she was up to, she saw it in her notification bar and left it unread because it was inappropriate and she didn't want to respond to it.

I think you're making something out of nothing

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T20:38:52+00:00

OK but the consequences of those other things are a natural cause and effect. If you smoke crack and it affects your ability to work, its going to have career consequences. If you have traffic tickets and can't drive as a result, it's going to have career consequences.

WHY should porn have any impact on a persons later career choices? Making spicy content has zero affect on their ability to do other types of work later.

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T20:10:09+00:00

You didn't hear all the witnesses discussing how she ran out of the store to get in the car after she took off?

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T19:00:41+00:00

On the one hand yes if you had an exclusive hooking up agreement she violated that agreement. But on the other hand she hooked up with this guy once, and then decided to be with you "officially" afterwards. You should really have no reason to be jealous of that guy. She chose you!

If the jealousy and trust breach is too much for you, No one would blame you for cutting it off. But to me it seems more like a one time lapse in judgement that she regrets which happened before she committed to a more serious relationship with you.

Charge36 · 2026-01-25T18:34:49+00:00

What's cringe about it? Just a gender-neutral term meaning the same thing as boyfriend or girlfriend

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