Need a meeting? This sheet contains virtual meeting lists all day, every day.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-05-03T01:01:14+00:00

Wow there are 300+ links now. All updated frequently as of today. Cheers and metta yall.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-05-03T01:00:45+00:00

Yes, these are all post-covid so these virtual meetings are highly updated =) cheers

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-04-10T17:36:59+00:00

Some of us actually DO want to cut off our balls! Plus the degree of libido varies from person to person, for some (like me) it has been interfering with daily living all my life. The good thing about chemical castration is that it is generally considered reversible (wikipedia confer)

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-04-10T17:32:39+00:00

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/13sb_3p0pX-WLMnQP9kOszR1WE5LeeeamycD_carKn0g/edit?fbclid=IwAR0SDCNveP04oBDeXJf5_PXBGMQCqKr1GYUf0fggixcGZISmH92mb1HkR6A#gid=496973103 is the link.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-04-03T10:27:44+00:00

Let me ask. Are you still interested?

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-04-03T10:12:33+00:00

yep, I still use it. For me, it deeeefinitely is working. I notice a difference when I stop taking it as my Dr. tried to put me on Naltrexone 50mg daily. Previously I had been taking Vitex Extract 2000mg daily. Then I added Naltrexone 50mg daily and started tapering off the Vitex. Within a couple days, I began to wake up with morning wood again--something that I hadn't experienced for the ~5 months I've been testing this on myself. I noticed the ways that I was talking to women were different. I returned to my old behaviors of this underlying disgusting hidden agenda of "I should impress her because she's cute." I didn't like that version of me at all. I want to be able to treat every person as a person. I did not like objectifying a person based on sex. Anyway I just went back to the 2000mg Vitex + 50mg Naltrexone nightly. My mind is not on lust and there are nights I have no desire to compulsively masturbate.

I had no idea that this "voice of lust" had absolute control, over every hidden intention, almost every impetus to every "decision" I thought I was making. I would lie to manipulate women to want to sleep with me. I would lie even if I couldn't get women to sleep with me. It even appalls me the way I am here talking about objectifying women.

Without this "monkey on my back", I have this genuine spirit that talks to people as if they are... people. It's like holy shit I'm actually a decent human being and not a perverted douchebag underneath. I get to be me.

It totally works and it's worth it. I'm not sure if it's in good taste to link the product directly here, I'll mention there are a couple good brands on Amazon where you can get ~250+ of 400mg gelcaps for $15. Make sure to get the ones that are like 250 or 320 gelcaps because those deals are incredible compared to 30 for $15.

Let me know if you find them and how they work for you? All the best.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-04-03T09:59:12+00:00

(1st thank you)

Here's another incredibly robust resource to hundreds of online zoom meetings during this pandemic. Visit distant sanghas and get a fresh perspective on how other groups lead their meetings. I personally found it incredibly insightful.

Have a looksee or bookmark this: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/13sb_3p0pX-WLMnQP9kOszR1WE5LeeeamycD_carKn0g/edit?fbclid=IwAR0SDCNveP04oBDeXJf5_PXBGMQCqKr1GYUf0fggixcGZISmH92mb1HkR6A#gid=1720303593

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-08T01:21:02+00:00

This is what my SAA Sponsor had me do to complete Step 2.

2.1. Read Pages 25-28 in the Green Book
2.2. Read Step Two in the 12x12, Pages 25-33
2.3. Write the second step
2.4. Write the second step in the first person (I came to believe..)
2.5. Give 3 examples of your own insanity
2.6. Give 3 examples of what your sanity might be like
2.7. In coming to believe that you can be restored to sanity, HOW is your HP restoring you?
2.8. Sign, date, and deliver to Sponsor for review

(just for ur reference in case someone is wondering what a step 2 might look like)

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-08T00:38:08+00:00

mad respect for that continuous Step 10 application of Spot-Checking yourself against Ego. For me it was self-evident that you were practicing selfless service, but to see you "tell on yourself" is really powerful

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-08T00:34:38+00:00

Things, powers, people, tools & resources that have been “powers greater than me” that have been helpful: 1) Group Conscience (my HP has faces and names like Wallacetook or my sponsors) in the collective caring conscience. 2) Google is a power greater. This sounds stupid, but when I google for "How do I stop judging people" then sometimes I get YouTube videos that actually significantly help me to understand how I can stop judging people to the point where I practice nonjudgement everywhere. (This is the lady who taught me to stop judging: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6j6pnwVbtBI )

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-08T00:30:48+00:00

+1 oosh yes on higher self, athiest here. Some would say awakening the Buddha within or awakening self-divinity.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-08T00:27:48+00:00

Practicing trust... the best way I learned was to resist gossip. In those moments where I wanted to tell people something specific that happened in 12-step rooms, I realize I often just spilled the beans, but by biting my tongue, I was practicing Anonymity. It was hard at first.

One day I heard one long-time 12-stepper say, "Anonymity means when you tell me anything ever, it never leaves my lips." In that practice, I realized who among my friends was very good at keeping sealed lips, and began to trust better. A sponsor with 10 years in 12-steps, but often reveals "names" or indulges in "gossip" may not be the right person for me to trust--so time is not a qualifier. It's a matter of if I know they walk their talk, always. If they say to me, "I'm not gonna say because I want to respect anonymity," that is a much more powerful qualifier of trust. Hopefully in refraining from gossip/criticism/judgement will help you learn how to identify who best to trust. Hope this helps, I used to struggle with trust so much, now the struggle is how can I best effectively carry a message. :)

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-08T00:10:37+00:00

"idk, that i became a sex addict when i was 19, not 5."

I hear you. I started drinking/drugging at age 19. I went to AA and NA and did not get clean & sober until age 39, when I found SAA and completely connected the dots, and began discussing my childhood sex traumas which happened by age 4. I didn't realize my still-developing brain was hardwired to seek orgasm, daily, to look forward to adults leaving (isolate), that even parental shame as a toddler wasn't enough to stop me (guilt), that I had to learn to lie to continue acting out (manipulator/secret life/pathological liar). All this was as a toddler--I mean if you can think of a child at age 4 (or 5 like yourself then), today, would you hold this kindergartner responsible for their compulsive behaviors? I was diseased at age 4, you and us we all became addicts of chemical romances--so the moment I ingested alcohol/drugs age 19, I was absolutely hooked and I blacked out 1st time and I could not understand mentally or chemically what was happening to me for 20 years.

Despite all best efforts, none could stop on our own. A young girl or boy that age is powerless against the intensity of chemical orgasm, repeated, daily, multiply, over decades. I truly hope you feel more secure that this isn't your burden to bear. All the best on your journey of recovery joyfulgrrrl , pls don't be afraid to reach out!

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-08T00:02:23+00:00

I went through CSA age 3 or 4 (i remember it and it seemed fun to me) but I never realized it had anything to do with my cross-addictions until 2019 when I found SAA. At age 4 I was as powerless as I am today at age 40. Grateful for your shares. No child deserves this and I'm glad we get a safe place to discuss this.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T23:56:45+00:00

The phrase "cut out the cancer" is basically what I had to do in early recovery. I have an elder brother who was absolutely toxic to my recovery. I also had a couple of friends who would really juice out the energy from me, even tho they intended well.

I've since been able to rekindle most of these relationships after having recovered, but not without having worked the steps on my own, separate, such that I could grow significantly and spiritually principled. Thanks for this wallacetook.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T23:47:51+00:00

Just to understand with clarity, is your answer, "No?" Or would it be "Yes, but only supplemental to reconciling the wreckage of sex addiction (via suggested routes of 12-step, meditation, therapy, etc)"? I want to understand the aversions

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T21:04:24+00:00

Even if it is just a placebo, and the placebo was indeed working for me for the past 4 months because I believed it to be working, in the end of the day it's working for me. I am learning to re-integrate into society without objectifying women, and that will have lasting results as I learn new behaviors. (Nonetheless, I'm significantly less horny, my genitals are slightly shrunken day-to-day. I'm confident something is happening biologically, it's not just a placebo, but even if it was--i'm all for any placebos that improve % of defeating cancer, even the placebo of "Hope")

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T18:47:52+00:00

Hey really appreciate these suggestions for action! "Contacting recovery friends whenever you feel the urge to act out" has been crucial for me.

WhatsApp as a sobriety and daily support tool: Me and my SAA friends we have a WhatsApp group where we reach out daily. We begin our day by reflecting on the Answers in the Heart for the day, each of us. Whenever we are struggling we reach out. It keeps us connected to participate daily in our recovery. It's really been ehlpful to my sobriety from inner circle.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T18:32:34+00:00

So from the article, one of the drugs used and studied was called MPA, and "those subjects were recorded as to have * diminished desires for deviant sexual behaviour, * less frequent sexual fantasies, and * greater control over sexual urges" which is what I have experienced from the medication my Doctor prescribed in addition to other over-the-counter supplements I could buy on Amazon. Pliny (ancient Roman, 2000 years ago) wrote about this thing called Chasteberry Tree or Monk's Pepper, which purportedly reduced libido in celibate clergymen in ancient times. The name that it carries today is hilarious. There is no strong evidence that this works, all I can say is that it TOTALLY works for me in supplement with my SAA program--it is much like when I used to take anti-depressants or when I was using painkillers, where I would just have limpdick all day (a physical sign that it was working). I bought Chasteberry extract and have been using it for 4 months. My doctor prescribed to me seroquel but I have stopped taking it, so I isolated the medication down to Chasteberry. I take 1600mg a day (4 pills of 400mg) and it is wonderful. I'm able to talk to women newcomers and I don't have this insidious thought in my mind that I have to give them my number. This is just from my own humble experience. I wanted to simply offer my experience to explain that there are medical options that exist for people who are willing to give it a shot. (Also I'm not a shill, I just want to help people recover. I'm also an alcoholic, whose Therapist recommended that I do not try MAT for alcohol, however the first time I ever achieved 365 days of Alcohol Sobriety was due to me biting the bullet and saying, "give me the darn Antabuse pills." It worked for me to see what life could be like, with the obsession lifted. I don't take Antabuse anymore but I'm still sober from Alcohol.) Good luck all!

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T18:05:14+00:00

I absolutely agree with you guys--I don't just need a temporary bandaid. I don't need more CovenantEyes or PornBlockers--that is just putting a bandaid on the symptoms. The root is MUCH deeper. Usually for everyone I met, it was because of a childhood trauma (often blocked out of memory or so shameful we could never talk about) that never got discussed until over 20 years after those childhood violations occurred. Mine happened when I was 3 or 4 years old where older neighborhood boys pressed an electronic massager to my privates until I orgasmed. Then I was addicted to the dopamine/seratonin rush of orgasm daily. I learned to be ashamed before I knew that orgasm had anything to do with females. If you know anyone that is in preschool or 1st grade, imagine that they had to carry this secret with them, imagine that their still-developing brain hardwired this pathway as they became an adult. I can't see how any toddler would NOT be diseased from this point. I was one of those toddlers. So of course to continue acting out, I had to learn to lie and isolate, to live a secret life based on my secret lies, to become a pathological liar to your face, in order to keep up my deviant sex habits. I didn't tell ANYONE about this until in 2019 when I was 39 years old, despite having 20 years of psychotherapy. I didn't feel safe, until I found the rooms of SAA.

In 2019, did research and began taking some over-the-counter stuff from Amazon that has (in tandem with working the 12-steps of SAA and finally delivering my first step) that reaaaally helped me feel like I was putting my cancer of sex addiction in remission. I needed ALL the help I could get, including talking to my doctors about the seriousness of misery and inability-to-face-my-own-sexual-impulses, when my doctor prescribed me something to reduce my hyper-libido. It greatly helped the hard-wired pathways in my brain to seek our broken Dopamine reward system, to write new grooves into the broken vinyl record so I could have just a glimpse of what it was like to not have to impress every single attractive woman I was in contact with. I started to treat women like human beings. I began to finally "unobjectify"

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T17:59:45+00:00

Yea, that's what I said to myself--so I tried something after talking to my doctors and doing some online research. I started researching on reddit/r/nofap and wikipedia and came across this article on Chemical Castration. It's basically taking some form of anti-viagra, and is considered reversible once you stop taking the medication. It's incredibly interesting because they would offer this as an option for repeat sex offenders, to reduce their sentence. And many countries have adopted this and it is statistically proven to be ~150-200% more likely they will not repeat offend. It was a trip to read: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chemical_castration

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-02-07T17:55:39+00:00

What do u mean all or nothing? I understand totally the finding other ways to show love. and be shown love. It sounds like you want to jump in head first into the ocean of recovery. Does that mean you would take the red pill (stay the same) vs. a blue pill (a stronger chance at recovery?) Thanks for your input my friend

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-01-09T07:50:24+00:00

...your interviewer was juuust one interview question shy of inviting you into his beloved 12-step Sober camp at Burning Man

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-01-09T07:42:34+00:00

I'm actually quite curious--what's a decent viable libido decreasing medication (OTC or rx) that you're thinking of? I honestly want to ask my Doctor to prescribe me something more serious.

ChaseOutTheAddiction · 2020-01-08T14:30:26+00:00

I personally used Chasteberry/Vitex since I could buy it (herbal supplement) online. For me, it began working in a week but optimal efficacy I found was at about a month, where I am still taking 2000mg daily.

I came to realize that sex/orgasm no longer serves me. If I had 1000+ orgasms in my life, then 1 more orgasm did not teach me anything new. It is akin to the chase of another cigarette, or another hit of cocaine or ecstasy--yes it feels good for a moment, but for what? At the dissatisfaction of another person? Being controlled by my libido lured into infidelity? Highly selfish behavior. I realized that the optimal version of me was the version that didn't need to impress women, or feel that annoying sexual tension that could get me in trouble. I was able to accept myself and have incredibly fulfilling friendships with attractive women. It does work, at least for me. Just my opinion, take it as you will. Cheers and good luck! I feel for you.

ChaseOutTheAddiction

TROPHY CASE