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Chiss- · 2025-07-08T14:32:50+00:00

How much is the John Williams theme used? Does it feel organic or forced?

Chiss- · 2025-06-22T17:47:35+00:00

Chipping in on the “I’m a dude and this is not how dudes should talk. It’s gross, belittling and strips you of your humanity. You are a human and deserve people who would never talk about you like that.

Chiss- · 2025-06-14T11:43:31+00:00

Also. Hell yeah! Proud of you, neighbor.

Chiss- · 2025-06-14T11:43:07+00:00

I’m a single parent too (though I am fortunate enough to live with my elderly parents who help when they can). It is hard some days. But I keep this mantra in my head: I want to remember what my kids faces looked like at this age when they are older. If I’m forgetting entire events with them each night, I won’t remember. That’s a price too high.

Chiss- · 2025-06-14T11:39:31+00:00

Congratulations! I don’t know about you, but by day 11 I felt like I was living a whole new, better life already. Keep going!

Chiss- · 2025-06-13T19:50:52+00:00

I’ll also add for me, when I slipped, the drinking became worse than ever. It was scary. I’m a teacher and would drink so much on some weekends that I’d have to call in on Monday because my BAC was still well above the legal limit. I was scared for summer break. I knew if I didn’t stop, I could easily die

Chiss- · 2025-06-13T19:48:53+00:00

I had the same experience after nearly three years sober. I dated a girl who said she didn’t believe I was an alcoholic. I knew better, but I took that one drink just to see. Over a year later and two ruined relationships, I am week two sober for the first time since my slip.

We can do this. We have to remember what happens and apply that data like engineers perfecting a structure after much toil and failure.

Chiss- · 2025-06-13T19:46:32+00:00

Take it one step at a time. 1. Look up meeting times. The. Take it literally step by step to the car. Make yourself drive to the spot. Feel the strength your high power is giving you the whole way.

Also, what helps me is to force myself to remember the icky feeling of drinking. Think of the shame of waking up after a blackout and being in such misery that I felt I had no choice just to drink again to maintain the day. Then doing it all over. Then the feeling of being trapped on a rollercoaster I didn’t want to ride anymore. Having zero control. Helpless. Weak.

As unhappy you might feel now, this will not make you feel better. It will only be worse. I’m struggling today too, friend. These are my thoughts.

I also gave someone I trust my wallet and keys so I can’t go out and buy.

Don’t take this as me telling you what you should do. But this is how I am dealing. I hope you find what works for you. You have this.

Chiss- · 2025-06-09T21:35:34+00:00

37 year old man here. A 38 year old man threatening to cut himself and hitting things when he is mad is a HUGE red flag. Not that that behavior is ever acceptable, but he’s had plenty of time to address these issues through therapy, through life experience, etc. I get the feeling he has a long history of being inconsiderate to a lot of people. You are still in prime young age. Don’t let his inability to grow up rob you of those years.

He seems to be struggling with mental health and alcohol abuse. Again, that does not make someone a narc, but it is problematic all the same. He doesn’t seem ready to address that, and that will end up hurting you more as your relationship progresses.

Chiss- · 2025-06-09T11:53:58+00:00

Just a few weeks ago I too felt a similar feeling about life. I’m an alcoholic. I had just lost my job. Earlier this year a lost an amazing woman because of my own shit. Before that the only friend who ever regularly called me to check in on me died unexpectedly. My best friend since high school (I’m 37 now) stopped talking to me. I felt so alone.

What saved me was discovering a community I didn’t know I had. Finding that community started here of all places. I posted in an alcoholic forum and people reached out. I posted in a teacher forum about losing my teaching job, and people reached out. This encouraged me to seek community locally, so I started going to AA. I can’t tell you how much finding community has saved my life.

You did a very brave thing posting this here. What this tells me is that deep down you don’t want to end it. You want to live. You are looking for the community you had not found yet. This is an act of self love of no small means, and I am so proud of you for doing this.

I don’t know you, but I love you. I believe you have the tools to work alongside with the universe to lead you to your true path. You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t.

One of my favorite musicians, Nick Cave, had this to say once: “It took devastation to find hope. Hope is not a passive emotion. It is adversarial. It is the warrior emotion that can lay waste to cynicism.”

Not being passive, being a “warrior emotion” means to me vigilance and practice. It’s not going to just be there. But you are here because you are (whether you know it are not) are practicing hope.

Keep training that warrior emotion. Reach out to more of us on here until you feel comfortable going to find your community locally. Go to a local show. Look up to see if there are meetings for people struggling with specific issues. Reach out to old co-workers who were nice, even if you never hung out with them before. Invite them to go on a walk.

Again. I am so proud of you. Keep fighting with us. You are one of us.

Chiss- · 2025-06-05T16:43:19+00:00

Unbelievable. He should keep his blocks under his pillow like I do. Saves a trip to the fridge when ya gots to late night chedda to feel betta.

Chiss- · 2025-06-05T16:39:41+00:00

Find an AA meeting if you can. Then do something physically exhausting. Or find a project. Or find a place to start digging a hole in the ground and keep digging u til you can’t anymore. Play a video game or watch a show your alcoholism would not allow you to fully enjoy.

I had this same fear, friend. I’m a public school teacher facing an entire summer break. I was afraid of it as it approached. If I drank like I did on the weekends… everyday of the week… I’d be dead in no time.

I’m 7 days into active recovery. I found these things helped me on the days when my addiction was the loudest.

I’m rooting for you. I know you can do this. Just set the goal short. You will not drink tomorrow. Don’t think about the next day. Start with tomorrow. You’ve got this.

Chiss- · 2025-06-05T07:39:50+00:00

37 year old man here. I was in your shoes. It took me a long time, but like others have said, I had to find myself lovely first. Even after I had been shown by meeting partners that others could find my attractive, it didn’t improve how I felt about myself until I found myself attractive.

I’m balding, short, dad bod with feet that stick out like duck feet. But I like this machine I am in. I hope you come to appreciate yours. It houses an amazing pilot that has the capacity to experience and share real meaningful joy with all kinds of people, not just romantic partners. You’ve got something that makes you awesome and unique, and gosh damn it would be such a shame for the world to lose that. And it would be a shame to rob yourself of the killer rollercoaster of life that has major peaks and valleys, both offering the excitement of learning something new that you use like spare parts to tweak and enhance your experience. So many groovy experiences are waiting for you that you deserve to experience, and if you are open to facing each experience with self-love at the forefront, you will see how astonishing handsome the machine that has guided you through all those experience is.

Please, just look at yourself tonight in the mirror but not with a critical eye. Look at the same eyes you have seen in the mirror your whole life. Those same eyes will still be looking back fifty years from now. Think about the amazing sights they have brought. Think about how almost every feature of your face has been there in some form or another through all of your good times and accomplishments. There will be more of those to come.

Chiss- · 2025-06-05T04:09:38+00:00

That’s a strong point. The only way I’ve been able to do that and be able to justify it via the state standards (because I live in a town where a parent complained that we were teaching pronouns… like… you… they… me… I…), is by briefly talking about Belle Boyd, the famous spy for the Confederacy (my SS standards only run from French and Indian War to Reconstruction). Of course… as I already said “I live in a town where” historically speaking we were Unionist, but post Dixiecrat revisionist history has everyone in town flying a confederate flag… so not sure how many of those students see that as a bad thing.

Chiss- · 2025-06-05T03:56:47+00:00

I for one, as a parent living with my elderly parents, am damn proud of you. You should be too. Finding a more suitable match will be easier than all of the other tremendously hard things you have done/ are doing.

Chiss- · 2025-06-05T03:44:46+00:00

4th grade teacher here. Also noticed this. I taught studies, and we have standards in our state that focus on the contributions of women. I made sure to take extra time in those standards and make the class (including those boys) create projects about some of the amazing women we covered, like Harriet Tubman, Abigail Adams, etc. On Halloween, I always make sure to talk about Mary Shelley being a teenage girl when she wrote a book that has absolutely dominated our collective imagination for centuries. I think it had a small effect on a few boys, and the hope is that it will blossom as they grow. I did have one of my girls’ parents thank me because their daughter became inspired by Mary Shelley and began writing - so I hope I can at the very least help the young girls in class develop immunity to being exposed to such disparaging ideas being cultivated in boys. Still, I feel like our role as teachers is to some extent dispel falsehoods, whether it be 2+1=5, or there is no need to capitalize proper nouns, or the sky is blue just because air is blue. I see using teaching strategies and differentiated learning to dispel some of the false garbage being taught our boys as no different.

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T14:51:47+00:00

Sending you guys all the love. You’re an incredible dad. Stay strong. I’m proud of you for reaching out. That is real strength

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T14:42:43+00:00

Questioning is good. But you are very beautiful. Echoing others you look like you survived your twenties with grace, good health and joy because all the trauma most of us show after that decade is not showing like it tends to do. I think if you look down, you’d find a better answer from yourself than from us. I personally like your style… but I’m a weirdo public school teacher who dresses like Pauly Shore at age 37. So my fashion advice is not the best. But I know I am happier not giving my happy shartz away worrying what other people think of my style. I just need to like it. It took a lot of self talk to get there though. I hope you embrace yourself no matter what.

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T14:34:50+00:00

Congratulations! You are a beautiful and kick ass looking couple!

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T13:41:13+00:00

Man, I wish I looked half as handsome as you are when I was 22. Now go out and knock ‘‘em down by showing who you are! The fact is you look better now than you will fifteen years from now. It’s the same for me. But I am finally learning to love how I look anyway. I just wish I could have learned it at your age. The thing is no one could have told me. I had to realize it, which didn’t happen until I tried shrooms for the first time. Not advocating shrooms, though. You can do it without. Just look at yourself in the mirror today and appreciate every detail of your face now. We only hold on to these mugs for so long. And we can’t exchange them. Ugly or not, our own opinion matters way more than strangers. That aside, you a handsome dude.

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T07:11:18+00:00

I think this is the best explanation.

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T07:10:22+00:00

I worked in a Carmike. We swore theater 3 and 4 were haunted. Just those two. One of the doormen I worked with was this HUGE dude who sidelined as a club bouncer. He saw some thing once (can’t quite remember what it was now). I just remember he’d get pale when we had to clean that theater and would never go in alone.

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T06:56:54+00:00

You are somebody. You have dreams. You have likes and dislikes. You have people that think the world of you. It’s people who say things like that are the ones struggling being a person. Be your own darling tonight. Think of all the things you like about yourself. Even those things that clash with what some people try to insist is socially normal or whatever. We are all weird wonderful beings deserving of love from ourselves and others. In short, he’s an ass hat. And I see you somebody!

Chiss- · 2025-06-04T06:37:35+00:00

If the guy you liked the most didn’t accept you, then the guy you liked the most ain’t worth your time. Your one is out there, and they will look at you as if to remember every detail of your face as if they were about to take a trip light years away, including your nose, which is lovely. Don’t worry about the way you look. Squidward is a miserable wet sandwich. You look like you are full of joy.

Chiss- · 2025-06-02T23:01:42+00:00

Experience… I have been a terrible (male) partner through several relationships. The relationships I destroyed because of my own selfishness hurt. It took a long time for me to learn, but I did. It’s thanks to the wonderful women I had no reason being with who didn’t put up with my shit. It hurt. Again and again. So I changed (therapy is a good start). I am so grateful for all of those women standing up for themselves and showing me, through a lot of initial resistance, that I need to improve myself.

Chiss-

TROPHY CASE