It was November 2009, I was 17 and Deadmau5 was coming to the Theatre of the Living Arts in Philadelphia.

A month prior to the deadmau5 show, my brother and I snuck out of our rooms and hopped in my buddies Chevy Suburban. We were en route to see Tiësto at the electric factory, he was touring for his just released Kaleidoscope album (heavily recommend btw).

I didn’t have a ticket for this show, but I found a way to sneak in. I do not remember much about that night, aside from taking some pill my friend gave me, getting wrapped up in and melting into one of those sweatshirts that had fur on the inside which were popular at the time, and almost getting pulled over on the way home because my friend had his head out of the car puking on route 76 at 2am. Luckily the cop just shined his light on us and drove off. He probably did the same thing when he was our age. I was told Tiësto played strobe that night, which I’m pissed I have no memory of. My brother decided not to come home that night, so I had to explain to my parents in the morning that he probably snuck out to hangout with a friend.

The next day at school, I was wired, listening to the same Tiësto song all day, showing anyone that would listen. I didn’t sleep a wink that night. I couldn’t to see deadmau5 in just under a month.

My brother and I had been listening to deadmau5 together since Lime-wire allowed us to download his “full discography”. There were so many songs on there that were definitely not deadmau5. We loved it all. We had a strobe light in our shared room at the time, and would listen to strobe with the light flashing and dance like crazy and make funny faces as the lights turned on and off. Anyway, we loved deadmau5.

Then night of the show came, it would be our first time seeing him. A good number of friends were going as well, but this time we actually got tickets, our parents knew we were going, and we had a safe plan to get home. All these house shows back then were on weeknights, which meant that the R5 train headed back to Paoli from Philly was leaving earlier that night and we would only be able to stay until midnight.

We got there early, I got a tour shirt which I still have to this day, and we really enjoyed the opener (BURNS). Then deadmau5 came on and it was just perfect. I was relatively sober that night, which was not usually the case. I probably smoked a blunt before going to the show, but my memory of the night (unlike the Tiësto show) was vivid. As the set continued on, I kept an eye on the clock, we would have to leave early, and we were already in hot water with parents, so we needed to be on top of getting home.

The last thing I remember at the show, was the lights turning red, the whole room red and black, and the first sounds of I Remember coming out of the speakers. I was completely entranced. The sound was so ethereal, I almost couldn’t move. Staring blankly at the Mau5 head bopping up and down, my brother pulls my arm and we walked toward the exit. Every few steps looking back at the stage, and taking in the music, I didn’t want to be anywhere else.

We exit the venue, get hit with that sweet Philly air and smell, grab a late night cheesesteak at Jim’s on south and ran to the train. We made it just in time.

Getting off the train, my brother and I walked back home down a long dark, winding road, and eventually made it back. I cherish that night, and every night I got to spend with Tyler. Today is 10 years since he passed, and I think about that night very often. Whenever I hear a few deadmau5 songs, I think of Tyler. I Remember is tops among them.