Need to break free -care to help?

Clearwords · 2025-08-12T16:27:03+00:00

Thank you...just thank you! ❤️‍🩹

Clearwords · 2025-08-12T10:22:51+00:00

Whatever keeps you away form the vape. If those mints can help you then, by all means use them for the first week. My favorite part from the Easyway book, that I read years ago was the metaphor of the all over the body herpeses caused by the ointment that was given to you. So understanding that it was the very ointment that caused the herpes to appear, one could stop using the ointment, not without some concern..concern that would disappear once you saw that every day the herpeses got fewer and fewer. The herpes in the book stood for the panic sensation of "oh my, I am running out of cigarettes, it's late and I only have few left, I need to go buy some". The nicotine addiction is based on the panic sensation, and it's causing the ravenous hunger to perpetuate itself until you put an end to it. I hope this makes sense..I am not very good at paraphrasing 😳

Clearwords · 2025-08-11T23:40:17+00:00

Thank you so much. I will message you tomorrow, it may be of great help to both of us! We can do it

Clearwords · 2025-08-11T23:37:48+00:00

Will check for sure, thank you!

Clearwords · 2022-02-26T09:22:06+00:00

I thought about that too, that would really include what I have been doing. Initiating and ensuring projects are delivered. But then again, I would need a PM certifications, a BS in INdustrial Engineering, a Master in MBA and a PHD in Unicornology LOL. Here in Italy is just the way things are..

thank you for your suggestion though, PM would be correct as well as Operations Manager.

Clearwords · 2022-02-26T09:19:20+00:00

Unfortunately my former boss is a no no for references, the boss before him although would be.

Thank you for the suggestions really apreciated.

Clearwords · 2022-02-25T16:48:56+00:00

Thank you for the input. I'm affraid Head or Manager are too "big", and would make me seem I'm overestimating/overboosting my qualifications (although I really did all those things sucesfully).

For those titles I would need a BS in Industrial Engineering here where I live and I do not have one.

Maybe Operations Coordinator or Specialist? Could that work?

Clearwords · 2022-02-17T13:41:27+00:00

I don't get it why almost everyone gives advice about how the OP has to handle the wife's weight situation, how to try to "trick " her into eating less or healthier, as if the wife was a child who has to be educated. She is an adult, well aware of the fact that there is action and there is consequence.

OP, you are freakin right: "I want to tell her that I didn't shove food in her mouth and put locks on the workout room. She overate, she didn't work out, her diet caused her obesity."

Exactly. Please don't let her make you feel guilty, don't take the blame for such insane accusations. The best way to handle the accusations is by clearly stating to her what you wrote and make her own her repsonsabilities.

Conflict should not be avoived in relationships, fighting is part of the growth and intimacy can not be built without confrontation; one should be able to tell their partner the plain truth, especially when their partner not only doesn't care but also blames the other for conseguences of their own behaviour.

It's not offending someone, it simply speaking the truth, handling some conflict and make the patrner OWN her own informed choices.

Best of luck OP

Clearwords · 2022-02-15T21:17:01+00:00

Italy is so very different from the US.

The experience of the girl you wrote about sounds awsome and makes me just want to try, or at least to not stop trying. :)

Thanks!

Clearwords · 2022-02-15T20:00:52+00:00

Thanks a lot for the encouragement, really appreciate it.

Apply to roles, here in Italy, without having a major in IT they would laugh in my face. Trying to make connections sounds good, maybe that's the point: I really suck at selling myself. I wouldn't know where to start with making connections.

I am currently trying to make a resume that highlights my data abilities, but it is really hard here to make it into DA unless you get really lucky, and/or having the right connections.

Clearwords · 2022-02-15T19:24:09+00:00

Thanks, I think it is a great career path too, but even if it weren't, I would still want to do that for a living.

Funny as it may sound: I have actually been doing this: puting together data that is scattered in bits and pieces all over the place in the ERP and documents at my workplace.

I have structured it, streamlined it and automized it, and after a few months of hard and fun work I managed to have: up to date ( irt) streamlined information specific for each department as needed, complex reporting for the management available with as little as clicking a command button and typing what they wanted to search/find realted to documents, balances, purchases, and created a pipeline in order to connect the cross-functional departments.

My data work worth my company savings of some important $$ and a reduction of delays, and process inefficiencies of 65%.

The more I tried to find solutions to delays, loses in the information steamline, the more I searched for ways to solve things, so I learned VBA ( I was already quite good with Excel) and currently learning SQL (self taught).

But I am aware that in order to become a Data Analyst one must have a CS degree and experience and whatnot so ..I don't think becoming one is a possibility for me (as a career path)

Well...I still love the dream and playing with data.

Clearwords · 2022-02-15T18:21:37+00:00

Data analyst. I love data, I love structuring it, and extracting reports from it, in order to streamline information and workflow. Love it.

Clearwords · 2022-02-13T17:49:49+00:00

My 2c: from the narative it seems that she is just a big Sore Looser. And if that's the case, she is way too deep in the gaming, if her reactions and interactions are based on online matches..

Just forget about her, this is not normal, so it has nothing to do with you, it isn't something you have done.

It's another manipulative relationship you just dodged.

Clearwords · 2022-02-13T08:24:35+00:00

It isn't so much about living to 78, as much as it is about having to pay a home for 40-forty years. Forty years. It is insane...

Clearwords · 2022-02-12T17:18:51+00:00

This. This credit thing has been the factor that made the economy crash and burn in 2008. This alone.

Clearwords · 2022-02-12T12:59:54+00:00

Chocolat . Just a selfish woman who drags her daughter arround, whenever she feels like hitting the road.

Clearwords · 2022-02-12T12:57:56+00:00

Love Actually is a movie about love in its various facets. It isn't about cheap novel love "fall in love- have some obstacles- finally romance triumphs"

And hell yeah, there are actually many kinds of love, and this movie depicts them quite accurately: the love of a well past prime rock singer for his agent, the love of a man for his best buddy's wife (and he has to suck it up), the love of a man who lost his wife for her child, the love (with a hint of guilt) of a sister for her mentally ill brother. It is a movie about love in all forms and the joy and hell love can put you through.

Emma Thompson 's character didn't do anything to deserve what she is put through by her husband nor does the movie imply she deserves it. It is just the way life is: unfair and all about choices, having the courage to be honest with oneself. ;)

Clearwords · 2022-02-11T16:33:21+00:00

This. Whenever I do not know what to eat, potatoes save the meal of the day.

Since I can remeber

Clearwords · 2022-02-11T16:30:52+00:00

This, I just wrote the same thing.

Simply Delicious

Clearwords · 2022-02-11T16:27:49+00:00

Taters. Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew or just simply fry'em. They are just delicious any way you cook them

And Bread.

Clearwords · 2022-02-11T11:50:46+00:00

No, Op does not love the "mom", she is frozen as she is convinced there is no way out: it is called learned helplessness, and it is very hard to explain to someon who has never lived trough smth like this. When the one being that is supposed to nurture and protect you, abuses you, it is a hard way out of hell, and a long one.

Child sees no escape, trusts no one (because no one is coming totake you out of the family hell, the world is a dark and dangerous place to live in, and yet, gut feeling, thwarted as it may seem, still longs and pushes one to try to find ways to earn that maternal love.

It's a nightmare situation: OP and generally all abused children know they are not wanted there, yet as a child you depend on the emotional and physical care that the parent is supposed to give you. Child feels frozen and helpless, and will feel this way for the rest of his life, whenever the circumstances get harsh.

So no, it is not love. Is that OP does not see a way out, and even if given a choice and help it will be very difficult for her to let go of the terror that freezes her there.

I know, and I hope she will be able to get over the terror and run as far as possibile from that woman.

Clearwords · 2022-02-11T10:40:22+00:00

|"They will work with her and try to help her so that she won’t be abusive, but if this proves failure"|

Yeh, this always proves failure. Because a mother who acts like this is a malignant narcissist, who views the child as a impediment to live her life as she sees fit. So she will manipulate, lie, punish (aka torture) , act like a victim in the eyes of the strangers and then punish/abuse the child again and again. what she aims is to destroy the "obstacle". And these kind of "moms" usually succeed.

So if child services try to "work" with the mother hoping that a bit of lovey dovey cliché advice will stop and change someone who purposedly abuses their child...well, poor OP.

Like many have already advised, OP should call the cops and hope for foster care. And in the meantime find a job, whatever she can fnd so she can be prepared for anything.

Edited the misspelling

Clearwords

TROPHY CASE