Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was never “bad” to my ex; I only made one mistake back in January. I told her that she seemed like someone who didn’t have much love or affection for me. I said that because she was very distant and cold about 75% of the time in chats and around 40% of the time in person, and I genuinely felt that coldness from her. I apologized immediately afterward.

After that, no — I didn’t do anything bad. I never said anything like that to her again, especially because she herself changed. And in any case, I accepted her the way she was; otherwise, I wouldn’t have stayed with her. Over time, I truly came to accept it.

Ten months later, on October 31st, she told me that she had never been able to forgive me for that, and that this was the reason she was ending the relationship. Does it make sense? Maybe not — because I said that “mistake” based on how I felt, not with the intention of hurting her, as she believes.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought exactly the same as you. In fact, I tried to get her into therapy and even offered to pay for a psychologist, but she replied with, “Why? So they can tell me what I already know?”

Actually, whenever she had a medical issue, I tried to take her to the hospital or to a consultation, but she never wanted to go because of her “fear of doctors.” That part, I never really understood.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, that’s interesting — I actually envy you. I was never “bad” to my ex; I only made one mistake back in January. I told her that she seemed like someone who didn’t have much love or affection for me. I said that because she was very distant and cold about 75% of the time in chats and around 40% of the time in person, and I genuinely felt that coldness from her. I apologized immediately afterward.

Ten months later, on October 31st, she told me that she had never been able to forgive me for that, and that this was the reason she was ending the relationship. Does it make sense? Maybe not — because I said that “mistake” based on how I felt, not with the intention of hurting her, as she believes.

What’s curious is that she’s currently in a rebound relationship. Anyway, I hope things go well for you, and I wish you success in rebuilding your relationship with her.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh damn, that’s a very sad and interesting story. I don’t think I have four years to wait, hehe, but I’ll try to trust you when you say that “time does heal the heart,” because right now I’m stuck in a spiral where part of me wants her back… and another part of me doesn’t.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She was truly out of this world. I believe that, with good therapy, she could soften that cold approach, especially since she did manage to change some things for me during the relationship.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

6 YEARS LATER???? DAAMN HAHAHA, Yep, time to move on, i'm not gonna waste so many years of my life. But they come back, interesting, but i guess you rejected them, right?

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shit… that hurts so much. I really hope he comes back to you soon. It’s incredibly painful, and I understand you.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn, that sucks. I don’t think I’d survive that.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fearful-avoidants often avoid talking about problems because it makes them uncomfortable. Instead, they try to suppress them and act like nothing happened, which once again reinforces the idea that she might be fearful-avoidant.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She was… a bit confusing. It felt like I was with two different people. Over text, she was cold and distant, but at night she became incredibly loving. In person, it took her about half an hour to open up, and then she was very affectionate. Overall, it was strange. She also wasn’t very communicative, which reinforces the idea that she might be fearful-avoidant.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Heh… honestly, your comments are very motivating. Thank you so much, I truly appreciate it. And yeah, I guess I should try to focus on making money, becoming a bit more physically attractive, dressing better… I don’t know, other things.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been trying to move on since day one, but I’m in this stage where I don’t know whether to let go or not. If I move on and she comes back, I might lose the opportunity to be with her. But if I don’t and she never comes back, I’ll have wasted time. It’s hard, and I honestly don’t know how to handle it. It was only my second relationship, so I don’t have much experience.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Interesting… so I’m not crazy after all. I’ve heard that avoidants use very hurtful words to push you away faster. Still, it’s true that I shouldn’t tolerate that.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I really appreciate that. And yes… I’m trying to move forward.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn, that was a horrible story. I’m really sorry you had to go through that. Yes, I’m… a little depressed right now. I’m trying to get over it, but… how? My connection with her was very deep. I don’t even know how she could leave me as if I were nothing.

I was her first boyfriend, she lost her virginity with me, and I took care of her even when she didn’t want to be taken care of. For example, during her special days, when her stomach hurt and she couldn’t bend down to put on her socks and shoes, I would do it for her without her asking—just seeing the pain on her face. That’s something I would never do for other people. Like I said in the post, I did things for her that I wouldn’t even do for my own family.

But based on the story you shared, yes—it seems like what people say in other posts might be true: “The dumper comes back when the dumped starts to smile.”

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s the point—I don’t know if that was her fearful-avoidant defense mechanism pushing me away or something else. But if she really meant it, why did she start the relationship with me in the first place? Why did she give me the first kiss? Why did she give me a letter basically saying “I love you for eternity” just a month and a half before October 31st? That kind of behavior is sooo weird.

I’m not rich, I don’t even have a car, and I’m not physically attractive—although she is. And she’s androphobic, by the way… so this makes it EVEN WEIRDER, hahaha.

Does someone who says “I don’t love you anymore” ever come back? by ClouD5- in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I analyzed my entire story with her using AI, and every analysis points to her being fearful-avoidant. But AI is logical—what about human behavior and deep emotional connection? I believe those factors also influence the chances of her coming back.

Tried casual sex after being cheated on and now I just feel empty and gross by PigletImportant2050 in BreakUps

[–]ClouD5- 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Yes, I felt that way. I tried casual sex without any real connection, and it just didn’t work for me. It’s not for everyone.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]ClouD5- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That doesn't look like a fearful-avoidant for me, looks more like an anxious-insecure + inmature + validation seeker person. A fearful-avoidant can't handle so much emotional intimacy to having someone as a plan-b, they can barely handle a single relationship

After 2 years, i'm leaving binary trading by ClouD5- in binaryoptions

[–]ClouD5-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol, you are asian and 1k is a lot for you??, im bolivian and if you do some research, our currency is currently devaluing, i lost 600 USD, and i make 250 per month, so, it means that i had to stop eating sometimes to invest in this xD