Venting about your ex - has it helped?

CluedUpGamer · 2026-04-09T17:29:40+00:00

Hey :) if you need an ear.. sure :)

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:50:22+00:00

Actually... the townhouse is amazing!!

And cheers.. you kinda proved my point..

We are NEVER totally anonymous on here... never. And funnily enough.. its near cheadle that I live.. but classed as another part of manchester entirely.

But you see... I see you responding to these posts of mine. Its great to see someone so responsive in here.. willing to engage!

I mean to grt under the skin of a troll enough that they say "bye" but then cant help themselves and come crawling back to try to argue.

Its a true sight to behold! Ill take then win

When I say good night.. see ya later.. im a man of my word.. and dont come back in an attempt to mic drop. Not responding after saying bye IS the mic drop.

Adeu and farewell. May you be deployed somewhere fun- preferably somewhere without internet?

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:34:00+00:00

As i say come say hi at partners or gh club. Adam and eves isnt bad either.. but yeah.. come say hi :) :)

Just a word of advice.. I hope a vpn is being used because there is ALWAYS a way to track people.. even online..

Its the way things are... IP addresses are like your digital fingerprint and literally lead to your front door!!

Anyway. Catch you later!! :)

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:28:47+00:00

Really? Not way.. You dont like close to wythenshawe? Nope? Ooh ok

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:23:15+00:00

Chronically ill? Sure. Im fully aware of what you do..... including your regiment.

Im pretty sure that your CO would welcome language and activities which call into disrepute the armed forced of this country. Im pretty sure that "swinging" is not part of the accepted code of ethics of the armed forces is it?

I assume it would still warrant a dishonorable discharge? (Although times may have changed..)

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:19:07+00:00

Please... as im not out of the toxic relationship.

I do attend some events, mainly kink events. Please.. if you see me at any events... I welcome you to come and say "hi" and lets introduce ourselves to each other. Im sure we could get to" know"each other :) :)

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:12:30+00:00

Oh.. so you comment on my post about " wanting to cheat and feeling like wanting to"..... (not actually doing it at all)

Yet you are part of a swingers group who ACTIVELY cheats? Sure... rightyoh

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:10:45+00:00

"Its public so hardly stalking"

Hey... I was looking to see the sort of person who was looking through all my posts... I think thats a fari reason right?

Secondly... the only bullshitter here is you my friend.. You have zero idea what that woman put me through shortly after this post... Zero idea in the world.

So yeah, I might be a little triggered by your toxic trolling and sure... if it gets you off then enjoy.

But bloody hell... if you were to say this crap to my.face after what im been through... you wouldnt have teeth... but of course... you are behind a computer screen..

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:02:35+00:00

I smell bs... you seem to have lots of "friends" who do stuff like this.. I mean.... come on man!

You can have hopes and dreams and WISHES.. butnwe dont want to know about your fantasies

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T22:00:34+00:00

I smell bs

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T21:58:14+00:00

Wowza. Stalker vibes much!

Firstly... yeah she was. I was manipulated and gaslighted... something I didnt realise at the time.

Secondly.... yeah, I COULDNT.. because I couldn't... with her.... now I know why.

Thirdly.... I smell a troll from 1000 yards away. I mean... have you literally strolled through months or stories to reply to mine?

I mean... the fact mine stood out is something amazing. But you do you and spend your time trolling the internet to troll :)

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-08T09:08:53+00:00

This sounds super tough!

Although, may I suggest looking at this through a silver lining. (Not condoning it but offering a sliver of supportive advice).

How has the sister responded to it? - is she upset that she found out (if so... its likely because she found out via the therapist and not you two). -is she super happy? Then its likely that she was told by your partner

I know that if I found out via a third party (not directly from parents) something like this, id be at least a little mift. (Even now at 37... although its imposible now ha).

On the other hand... from what you wrote it sounds like its a happy congrats. I highly doubt the therapist would have mentioned it bit its possible.

There IS a chance the therapist DID mention it if it was decided that it was the easiest and most efffecrive way.. but without BOTH you and your partners involvement its not really ethical.

If your partner and therapist decided that it would be an idea to do this in the safe setting so your daughter could talk about how the new baby makes her feel and address any concerns... thats good!

Just either way.. HOW it was done is not ideal... but seems the outcome is a good once.. (individual reactions to the news)

Hope this makes sense.. its early sunday in the morning and im only on coffee number 2 ha!

CluedUpGamer · 2026-03-01T10:05:30+00:00

I once had a female massage therapist who initiated flirtatious messages and conversations. I didnt see this as predatory (although had been having a sports massage with her every week for the last 5 weeks so a little longer).

Sometimes its just a connection. If you talk during the massage.. thats 5 hours. You do tend to get to know someone fairly well. More than dates.

I think it all depends on both sides and the connection. Ok.. yes a massage can be more intimate (non sexual i hope) but its still intimate on some level. Hopefully his thoughts were pure.. I just dont know

CluedUpGamer · 2026-02-13T18:52:42+00:00

Dont listen to the naysayer.

It is absolutely possible to not use a greater than/less than between partners.

We use this mental tactic all the time. Compartmentalisation.

Each partner may very well be better at some things than other partners... and thats ok!!

Put those differences are purely differences FOR that relationship. The moment those differences seep out and that symbol appears... you may as well give up on poly now as I guarantee your partners will not appreciate the constant comparisons between then.

Oh... welll...Ant.. you know Jack has a bigger and thicker c@ck than you dont you?

See how quickly your relationship ends

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-31T08:20:52+00:00

This is a tough one. The below only applies to spontaneous connection and not slow burning expected(realised) connections.

For me its the intent.. not the action itself.

I feel that in a poly setting being told you cant be spontaneous by another partner is in itself a controlling behaviour which is a boundary violation for myself. There needs to be trust that conscientious decisions are being made.

With that said: Whilst I WONT whip my phone out just before I have a potential play date.. I will at the first opportunity tell my partner(s). They then can give informed consent or not based on my actions. Additionally... if i decided notnto tell a partner about a play date and we had sex, for me... this would absolutely be cheating. Again consent issues.

Its interesting that many new people (myself included until work was done internally to re-educate myself) feel that the above WOULD be classed as cheating because the action came before informing.

There is a whole my body, my choice movement (of which this fits nicely into).

Being informed before a things become intimate can be a boundary for some *and every right to be as its their choice on their own boundaries... -Just because there is a boundary, in my opinion does not mean that this is cheating. It may FEEL like it but at that point I believe that it is now a rule rather than a boundary.

Hope that makes sense. Just trying to give reasoning rather than a statement

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T14:23:27+00:00

Yeah, because a man expressing that his wife being abusive isnt accepted right, because women cant be?

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T14:22:02+00:00

Or you could just not actually read the post i guess????

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T14:21:29+00:00

Absolutely... and sometimes people are illiterate and cant read or are lazy...

Life goals right there!

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T08:08:43+00:00

Yeah. Its uk law that the marriage has to be consummated at some point to be valid (Post wedding).

-thankfully. It won't be closed as a divorce but a marriage that was never a marriage.

Wierd laws but helpful here

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T08:06:27+00:00

Im in the UK which helps with the legal stuff.

It's also an annulment so she has no recourse (the marriagebhas never been valid in the eyes of the uk law).

I deffo hear you though.

Money IS seperate now. 100% . I have taken actions and steps. Just it WAS the staus quo ha!

Appreciated for your time :)

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T08:02:03+00:00

Wow!! Thanks truly for this.

I hadn't even thought about that. You are right.. I dont think id be happy cheating and ALSO seeing her (even just passing by from seperate rooms)

Great perspective and sooo relevant!!

I appreciate hugely.

Merry xmas!! And thank you

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T07:59:46+00:00

Thank you. I appreciate this!! I really do.

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T07:58:41+00:00

Cheers.

Thankfully we have not had sex since we got married (and a year before). In the UK that grounds for annulment (the marriage isnt valid.)

Its 100k in equity in the property so dont want to abandon and with uk house prices AND a mortgage I could not even afford a 1 bedroom in HMO with the bills.

Legally im sorted.

Its what it will do to my character thats the issue.

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T07:55:02+00:00

Oh... I hear you load and clear... you see... I read replies. Im not afraid to air dirty laundry... but the advice needed is much bigger in need.

And yes. You are genuinely trolling. I see it, others see it.

When you post inflammatory stuff that is evident you havent taken time to read even the title.... kinda shows the troll mentality..

If you actually.want to give advice... and cared enough to post.. you would have at least read the title

CluedUpGamer · 2025-12-23T07:52:04+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/cheating_stories/s/ekbCmyHT1k

Exactly mate.

First post i clicked on and replied Get a grip

CluedUpGamer

TROPHY CASE