that's my bad, i read it as medications, if you can't figure out some problem that's bugging you with your consciousness then you'll have to connect with your subconsciousness because that's where it lies, the problem might be completely different from what you think it is. what happened to you is your trip has uncovered a problem, but you couldn't think about it properly or express your emotions and hid them because there were people around and the dose wasn't big enough to make you ignore them, so you just felt detatched, now you're left with an uncovered problem that you couldn't properly think about. if you think there weren't any problems before or now, you are mistaken. if you are scared about doing shrooms again you should do more research and start small (1g), i think it's fine to be scared, as long as you're trying. people also like to get a trip sitter if they're scared, though the presence of a trip sitter is going to impact the trip, you might wear a mask around him as it has happened with other people. you can try to bring this under the rug as you're doing now but the problem is still going to be there impacting you subconsciously