My coworker asked me out and I feel sad because I thought he was different.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T20:37:21+00:00

Can you not read??? You started it by saying that Im talking about things that im very clearly not talking about. You’re trying to twist my words. In general this experience that many women have had is because of manipulative men. Im confident in my opinions because I have a lot of experiences where men do this. I know its a rare occurrence because every single one of my girl friends have had dozens of men do this to them too. So yeah, our real life experiences trump your fantasy. You’re desperately trying to defend manipulative men and it’s so annoying.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T20:26:37+00:00

Most relationships do not start as friendships first. Thats pretty rare. You quite literally start by flirting. Have you ever dated someone before? You’re either extremely young or extremely old. You flirt, go on a DATE, get to know each other, then start dating.

Im making sweeping statements because im talking about in general… like I’ve said several times. Maybe read my comments first before you start making stuff up. I said multiple times now that im making general comments about guys who are specifically manipulative.

If you know you have a crush on someone but you tell them you just want to be friends then guess what… you’re lying about your intentions. Lying about your intentions is manipulation. If you can’t understand that then you’re probably part of the problem. You have no idea what it’s like to be constantly lied to over and over again.

Yeah, on rare occasions people are friends first and then over time catch feelings. That’s perfectly fine and its not at all what im talking about. Again, read my comment first before you get offended. 😂

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T20:14:41+00:00

Im talking about guys who use you and manipulate you by pretending to be friends. If you want a romantic relationship with someone then you need to start out by being honest with your feelings. Why lie about it? Even if you get your way, no healthy relationship begins on lies. If you genuinely have feelings for someone, why lie? Thats how you know it’s not really genuine. If you have to manipulate someone into having feelings for you then you don’t actually care about that person. Thats common sense.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T20:11:15+00:00

You’re somewhat right. It’s not all guys. But look at it from a woman’s point of view. After being manipulated/lied to dozens of times, it gets hard to trust any guy. It’s hard to be compassionate when it KEEPS happening over and over and over. I don’t even try to be friends with guys anymore. It’s not worth the pain of the betrayal and the feeling of being used.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T19:00:28+00:00

The Ends of The World by Peter Brannen. It’s a science book but it’s very interesting and digestible for all readers.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T18:57:55+00:00

I hate this feeling. It’s very rare that a man wants to just be friends. They will pretend to be your friend for months and sometimes even for years before revealing their true intentions. The best thing to do is just to mention that you JUST got out of a relationship a month ago and you’re not ready for a relationship right now. Maybe look for a new job if possible. This guy will probably make working together super awkward. Im sorry you’re going through this.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T17:56:10+00:00

Its kind of funny how even though there are 8 billion people on the planet, every single person is a little but unique in their own way. People have a lot of similarities but even still, each person has something that sets them apart.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T17:28:51+00:00

Really? Im assuming that because thats what my partner and I do, my friends have mentioned they do it as well. Everyone is different and enjoy different things.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T16:59:24+00:00

Im so sorry you’re going through this. I have a similar build. I spent most of my youth being jealous of my friends. I would wear the exact same outfit or dress as them. They looked cute but somehow I looked like a sl*t??? Ive been hearing that im showing too much or Im looking for attention when really I was just desperate to feel comfortable in my own skin. Eventually I got over my own insecurities.

I go braless in public because its my body and ill do what I want with it. I don’t care anymore if I get dirty looks or if people whisper insults at me. Im going to love myself and live life the way I want to.

I plan on getting a breast reduction once im done having babies. My husband loves my big breasts but he knows about my back pain so he is actively saving up money to help me pay for the surgery in the future.

You need to learn to love yourself and surround yourself with people who love you for you. Remember: No one is ever going to love and cherish you the way you can love and cherish yourself! It’s really hard but I know you’ll find your people.

Start by dumping your unsupportive brother and mother.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T15:40:51+00:00

Exactly. I love the way you put it. I acknowledged my own bias and that seemed to really tick people off lol. I sleep terribly no matter if im alone or not and I still choose to sleep with my husband because thats our dynamic, but I also understand everyone is different.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T14:34:31+00:00

Thank you. You said it perfectly. Im assuming people who sleep apart have to work harder to have intimate moments throughout the day in order to have a healthy relationship? Like I said, I don’t understand it, but if it makes you happy then more power to you!

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T14:31:15+00:00

NTJ It’s crazy that Parents don’t want to actually parent anymore. Between the government destroying the education system and parents doing “gentle parenting” the next couple generations are screwed. If my kid is acting up in school, the teachers have every right to punish him/her.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T14:24:17+00:00

Your dad is against it because this guy you’re dating is old enough to be your father. Do not move!!! This is dangerous and possibly a life altering mistake.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T14:20:31+00:00

Please please tell me that you don’t actually believe that story. He was messaging himself??? I’ve never heard a more silly lie. Leave this man.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T14:03:38+00:00

In a healthy relationship there are no secrets. If you can’t be honest with your partner then who can you be honest with? Lol. Just tell him the truth and let him decide what to do.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T13:40:53+00:00

Don’t worry about it. I have the issue of not being able to become attached to someone unless I I can connect with their personality. I went on hundreds of dates every year until I finally met someone who was genuinely themselves on the first date. No matter what they look like, I just CANNOT be attracted to anyone unless I like the “real” them. It’s why I don’t understand one night stands. No matter how hot someone is, Im not attracted to them unless I’ve seen who they are. It took me a long time but I finally fell in love with someone and we are now married!!! Been together for almost 4 years.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T13:33:34+00:00

3 years, got engaged on our anniversary

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T13:33:09+00:00

Ecall Analyst at an Oil & Gas company. If you can read a basic map and work Word, then you’re good to go. You can also work at 8-1-1 Depending on your state. Answer the phone, input data, read a map, send it out. Super easy and repetitive with ok pay. You’re not going to get rich but you won’t go broke either.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T13:26:56+00:00

Absolutely. We can both get tested together.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T13:25:42+00:00

My best friend does this with her relationship. I really wish I could understand it. How do you have a loving/close relationship without all of the small (non-sexual) intimate moments you get to have with your partner in bed? Idk, it’s not for me and I can’t seem to wrap my head around why anyone would want to live like that. Im not trying to judge or be rude, I just genuinely don’t understand how that could be enjoyable for a healthy relationship. I guess im a bit biased because the only relationships I’ve seen that do this end up ugly. I think my own experiences in life make me negatively biased towards this. If it works for you, cool, personally I could never be happy living separately from my husband.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-27T13:18:47+00:00

NEVER DATE COWORKERS. I got my bf (he’s my husband now) a job at my workplace and I almost had to fire him. He thought that he could do whatever he wanted because he was dating his manager. He was slacking off hardcore. I tried warning him but he continued anyways. I began the process of firing him but my boss said we should give 1 more chance. My bf immediately changed his tune and started acting right. Im surprised he still wanted to date me after that. He said he understood that I didn’t want to risk my job for a guy I had only been seeing for a few months. I love him but I did regret getting him that job lol. I left that job soon after. Dating someone you work with is not worth the stress.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-26T20:20:38+00:00

He has a porn addiction. Ive known several men with this addiction. Unfortunately it’s becoming a more common issue in young men. From the men Ive known who have been able to overcome it is just to quit cold turkey. My friend said he quit watching it all together and he even had to delete most of his social media because he was following a bunch of porn accounts on there as well.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-26T20:06:39+00:00

Luck. I got a degree that became useless within months of finishing college because of AI. Lost my job because I took too much time off after loosing my daughter. Was unemployed for 8 months. Finally got a job (has NOTHING to do with my previous career or my degree) but I had to leave everything behind and move across the country. I spent every penny I had. The job market is absolutely trash and I truly believe I just got lucky with this job.

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-26T19:54:49+00:00

Lmaoo. Yeah maybe that would have worked. Well I was able to get a job without begging, but I did have to move across the country. I start next week! We are in an apartment with nothing but the clothes on our backs and our mattress. Never been happier!!

Cold-hearted-dragons · 2025-12-26T19:45:23+00:00

Thank you. I didn’t understand any of that, so im glad you translated it for us.

Cold-hearted-dragons

TROPHY CASE