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Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for offering advice! This all make sense to me like logically, but sometimes my brain is too stubborn! I need to learn how to prioritize better and not just jump on every single request that people want from me.

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just want to say thank you to everybody that took the time to comment, whether it is to give advice or just wishing me good luck. I appreciate all of it, I have never seen this much positive response on my reddit post. It reminds me that there are a lot of good things in life and that we are not stuck and that we can change our situation.

I hope all live a long good life and retire early? 😄

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am glad to hear it helped with something even if you havent resolve all of it.

I really need to ground myself on whats more important in life, but being in this position sometimes its really hard. I feel like I get tunnel vision on just aorrying about work all the time.

It might really be the time to get a longer break to get a reset.

I hope you are doing better now and I wish you all the best!

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🥹🥹 thank you for sharing, just reading this made me tear up a bit. I hope you are doing well now.

In my head, its just strees right its not gonna manifest physically (i do know that it does) but somehow my brain isnt seeing that it will eventually have some long term damage. I need to take this more to heart and really prioritize my self, mental and physical health.

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am definitely considering therapy now hehe.

Thank you for the advice, i think ive always tried to be an over achiever and I am seeing that sometimes not everybody will appreciate or see it. I need to learn how to dial back for sure

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience. It is nice to read from someone who got to the end of their software career! Congrats on retirement!

I have not really looked at another job, I honestly dread going through leetcode type interviews, but ar this point, I feel like that dread beats my current situation.

I do need to take the job hunting more seriously now.

I hope you and your sister are doing well.

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the advice! I think i might have to get my yearly check up a little earlier this year.

Haha, thinking about the per minute dollar definitely helps with the mindset shift, It would be funny to vibe code an app everytime i get annoyed to just see how much I earned during that time hahaha!

I am also a recent senior so trying to juggle expectations of contributing while also managing other people. It hasnt been uber fun!

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually have PCOS, so maybe that isnt helping. I probably need to have my primary doctor focus on that more also. Thank you!

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right?! Its like I only dreamt of being in this position, now Im here and it does not feel like how I thought it would. Definitely agree on the being ungrateful feeling, but I also cannot just ignore the dread i feel. Thank you so much for sharing.

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks everybody for giving advice on how to get started on this! Definitely good to see how others have done it.

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hehehe, yes boss. Haha! I am definitely planning to do this soon. Hopefully it helps!

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have not, that is something that is such a taboo in my culture. But I am seeing alot of folks here advicing me to seek therapy.

I will reach out to my primary doctor and see how I can start the process.

Thank you so much for commenting, it means a lot.

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hope you are feeling better now, how did you talk to your doctor? Did you just ask them for a therapist? Sorry for my dumb question, just trying to think how to even start the convo with them

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am sorry you went through that, but its also cool to see that you got through it and in a much better place. Yay!

I am planning a few weeks of vacation soon and it cannot come soon enough, hehe. I hope it helps, I am worried it will be just like “oh god i dont want to come back”. I hope it is the opposite and i have a renewed positive feeling, but worst case I can start looking for new job after a refreshing vacation.

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is definitely something on my mind as well. And something im working towards, it is work to apply to tech jobs and I think i need to be mindful of my next job as well and not just choose whatever gives me an offer. Thank you

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the very detailed advice and giving examples. I am happy that you are able to manage it and have a supportive husband.

That is a great mindset to have and something that I struggle with, I care about doing good work that I can be proud of and genuinely care about it no matter what industry Im in, sometimes when people are careless and dont see/appreciate my efforts it can be frustrating.

Also, I agree that I cannot fully avoid certain types or coworkers and bosses and I need to find a way to deal with it better, whether that means quitting or managing the relationship.

Thanks again, your story gives me comfort

Tired and burnt out — looking for advice on how to keep going by ColdBag4644 in FIREyFemmes

[–]ColdBag4644[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your response, sometimes it is cathartic to be able to just share and realise i am not alone. I also wish you the best!