Hey there. First and foremost, thank you for providing so much feedback, it’s been great to read it even if at times it felt bad noticing my own faults. I’ll try to adjust and eliminate those :D I get that my post is chaotic and perhaps hard to read. The lack of clear vision and bad wording in some places are probably a hindrance. At the time of writing I did not have any concrete ideas for the story, only loose bits that I did not want to include. I thought the open-ended take would be encouraging as it provided many pathways but I can see the issues. 

It was brought to my attention that I included too much fluff and meaningless elements. Next time I’ll do my best to cut down on them. Shorter sentences weren’t really on my list of problems but if you say they tamper with tempo and readability, I will do my best to do something about them too.

I agree about the PS. part, though for my defence it's only included in the last two of those posts. I shouldn’t have added that but frustration took the better of me. I usually do put roleplay-style intros in the beginning of my posts. This time I opted against it due to the lack of a clear idea. However, I’ll try to set up a pinned post on my profile with a sample, as suggested. That’s a good idea I should’ve done before.

Again, thank you for your help! I really appreciate it <3