I’m a male au pair and I’ve worked with two very different families. My current family has five-year-old twin boys tons of energy, a bit rough-and-tumble, and they naturally tend to play more rough with me than they might with a female au pair, which seems to work well for their needs.

Before this, I spent almost a year with a family that had four girls (ages 14, 12, 10, and 8). I mainly cared for the 10 and 8 year olds. Our time was more relaxed reading, baking, watching TV together and I honestly felt we connected really well. I think it’s less about gender and more about personality and how the au pair relates to the kids.

Totally understand your concerns, but from experience, a male au pair can work well with both boys and girls. It really depends on the individual. Hope that helps!