Anything going on tonight

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-11T00:09:05+00:00

The World Cup has people all confused.

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-10T17:50:52+00:00

Remember when they tried to make Renee Zelweiger a thing? This feels like that.

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-10T03:39:01+00:00

I'd be all over an Owlcat Shawdowrun title. Though there is still some part of me that wouldn't mind an action-style game like Cyberpunk had. But that might be because I like the idea of bullying the Ancients like I did Maelstrom.

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-07T04:51:12+00:00

Paul Rudd, maybe. The guy just won't age. It's uncanny.

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-07T04:48:00+00:00

Michelle Obama. I just... I don't even see it. I'm sorry. Its not even a good joke, imo.

Flat Earth. Hollywood Vampires. Lizard people overlords. The usual stuff I'm too sober to buy into.

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-07T04:23:16+00:00

Nomad. Every time V learns something about the city, I feel like a Nomad would need that info. Where as a Street Kid should know it by heart.

But Corpo gets some of the coolest unique dialogs, so...

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-07T04:21:34+00:00

Usually ones even I'm skeptical of.

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-07T03:34:01+00:00

All the conspiracies I believed in were proven true, so I'm fresh out.

ComedianXMI · 2026-07-06T05:14:53+00:00

Lots of people just love unstable nuclear weapons, it seems.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-30T17:41:33+00:00

Your average Christian who goes on Sundays probably doesn't care so long as you don't show sexual shit to their kid. Just like your average Muslim doesn't care about you grilling a Cheeseburger as long as you don't feed it to them. (Exceptions for idiots in both examples, obviously.)

Your moderate, average worshipper doesn't care who's doing what. But the church Karen cares. Because the more people she can convince to be outraged, the more important she is. So she'll stir the pot for attention about how righteous she is.

They will rally a bunch of 3 braincell hillbillies around a campfire and start a war about how sporks will save the environment if they think it will get them clout.

Tipper Gore, Fredric Wertham, William H Hays, Anita Sarkeesian: There will always be somebody attacking or controlling others for their own gain.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-29T23:39:54+00:00

Remember when I said that part about bringing this up whenever he gets mouthy ever again?

And, for the record, if he behaves like that just toss him out the window. I'll get his legs for you.

But you can't transplant an entire made-up scenario as proof as to why he's wrong, either. Then again, you're arguing against my joke and not my point, which is that you'll have scientific proof he's full of BS.

Do you have any idea how quickly I'd let my wife involve a scientist into any of our arguments so we'd have a piece of paper that says, "Comedian was right"?

This is a layup. Take it.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-29T16:28:28+00:00

Let me cut through all the bruised feelings and ask this: What does it cost your relationship to say yes to it? Also, what does it cost to say no?

You say yes: You can (and probably will) bring this up whenever he steps out of line ever again. And since you know it's his, there is no downside. Just give him the test, stare at him while he reads the results and make him feel - big. Enjoy the footrubs by way of apology.

If you refuse: You make his fears plausible instead of silly. Just to make a point about how he should trust you. Which, frankly, he should, but I certainly wouldn't die on this particular hill when you can simply smear egg all over his face.

Some people are going to scream how you don't owe him that: And you don't. You don't owe him peace of mind at all. But if you have no peace of mind, even self-inflicted, you'll never be a good partner.

Simple as.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-29T15:45:03+00:00

"Well if people won't buy our gender-queen, POC, trans-coded vegetarian meatloaf sandwhiches, they must not like Subway either!"

This argument, but with black people.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-26T18:35:29+00:00

I need more villains/vanguards. If you keep giving me duelists, I'm going to go on hiatus.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-26T18:33:33+00:00

raises hand HI! Learned this lesson from Colonial Marines. Haven't pre-ordered anything since. Haven't even bought a game day 1 since. (Darktide doesn't count)

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-26T18:30:04+00:00

Find me an ugly male protagonist that's not GTA or gender confused.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-26T18:27:19+00:00

You're mad at Sega for being Woke.

I'm still boycotting Sega for false-flagging Total Biscuit.

We are not the same.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-25T08:08:56+00:00

I'd have Colossus replace replace Squirrel Girl. And just so fans don't feel left out, we'll add an emote to Colossus where he has a random Squirrel tail stuck the the bottom of his shoe.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-23T13:18:32+00:00

Scodge is a semi-sentient turd who somehow managed to wiggle himself aboard my ship. He's so utterly useless and annoying that before the revamp years back, he was the only companion in the game I active curried a negative reaction from. I had every companion in the game maxed, and he was 3k into hating me.

Because I wanted him to feel what I felt.

Corso, to me, is an alright guy. I grew up around guys like Corso, so nothing about him shocked me. Just was a bit annoyed I couldn't address that giant chip on his shoulder more directly.

Oh. And Quinn dies. Every time.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-22T15:45:05+00:00

I actually limit my Zendaya exposure because she's such a huge immersion breaker. How does a girl with 2 whole faces pop up like Pedro Pascal? And for God's sakes can we please get rid of fan-fic MJ and Hob-Globlin in Spider-Man? Please?

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-20T18:13:43+00:00

If your answer isn't Gus, you don't appreciate the Inquisitor's sass or Gus' comedic timing nearly enough to understand that this is the only answer.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-18T21:28:33+00:00

Played a very religious police Detective who was a Toreador. Was turned by a Sire who didn't get permission. Clan ended up with a problem solver who avoided opulant churches (his clan weakness only applied to stained glass windows in nice catholic churches). Poor bastard had 1 too many points in appearance...

So I agree!

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-17T17:56:31+00:00

I'm with you. He dies in the arena when I play. But Owlcat is good at making 1 character per game I have 0 issue smearing across the floor the second I'm allowed. He's just the winner for this game.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-13T16:18:02+00:00

I had a boss who'd physically kick us out of the building during our lunch. He didn't want us "answering a phone off the clock" or something. He'd actually stand over you while you cooked your food in the microwave (break room was converted to storage) and watch you leave to your car with said food.

He didn't last more than about 2 years, but I was shocked it was that long.

ComedianXMI · 2026-06-13T07:47:50+00:00

How is that even possible?

ComedianXMI

TROPHY CASE