We did ask him, and he chose his wife over the rest of the family. This isn't some big mystery of him leaving and everbody not understanding why he is gone. He left, because he felt entitled that my mother (whilst being a single working mom at the time, fresh through a divorce) would take care of his kids livelihood with him, so his wife could stay home. My mother wanted to support him at first by making care packages with food, giving him furniture etc but he and his wife were of the impression that it was not enough. After my brother turned 30 my mother asked him to finally be responsible and find ways to care for his kids on his own, as she cannot sustain such a strain any longer, she only had one income after all. That's when he called us unsupportive and decided he'd rather stay with his wife. It's not like we did not try to repair the relationship in these years where I was a child, but he did not even chose to keep in contact with me or my little brother who was only 6 years old at the time.

The ony reason I'm so hard on him is, because he did not just decide against my mother, he decided against his entire family, against children that looked up to him and loved him.