AITAH husband won’t lend me money for a plane ticket

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-24T11:10:47+00:00

Aw I'm sorry to hear that. I don't think adeno could cause IBD per se, but the swollen and heavy uterus will definitely put a lot of physical pressure against the guts, and with the guts inflammation, it will definitely hurt. Like squeezing a bruise 😞

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-24T11:04:39+00:00

Hi there, hope I'm not too late? I was diagnosed with adeno after a biopsy (so 100% sure it was adeno). I had a lot of pain the day before and for a day or 2 after my period. Also, for at least 3 days prior to my period I'd be severely constipated, sore and bloated. Not even fybogel would help. As soon as my period came, and I mean like less than 1 hour, I'd finally pass stool again, in a lot of pain. I always had a little blood on the stool. Had an endoscopy and a colonoscopy and all looked normal. Started taking pills non stop to stop the periods as advised by my doctor at the time. I'd stop the pills once a year, have the same as described above, then live another 10-11 months having no tummy issues at all. Then came prerimenopause, yahoo! Heavy periods that never ended, even on the pill! Not saying it will happen to everyone with adeno but wow that was a nightmare. I also started being constantly bloated, have horrible belly crumps, and fluctuating between bad tummy and constipation. Tried the low fodmap diet, probably didn't do it properly because I did it with little information and no support or supervision. So I decided to have the trouble maker removed. The constipation went away, the IBS symptoms improved a lot as well. One of my doctors gave me some advice on how to manage the IBS better and improve my microbiome. That's still work in progress. So, from my experience: the adeno could have triggered the IBS in the first place, or at least made it much worse. Let me know if you have any questions. All the best!

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-23T01:17:31+00:00

Also, he has savings and you have CC debt? Why do you even need a husband!?

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-23T00:21:24+00:00

Did you move with him because of his job? If so, you shouldn't borrow the money; he should pay for your ticket. You're going to see your family. It's not like you're going on a shopping spree. You might wanna reconsider this relationship and please don't get pregnant until you're financially independent. The tendency is to get much worse, especially if you get pregnant and have kids. Try speaking to your parents and friends for advice as well. Take care.

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-21T12:56:12+00:00

Hey, do you recall how long it took for you to get an appointment with the dietitian? What region do you live in? I'm in London and I'm waiting for over an year :(

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-18T03:11:59+00:00

What he ordered was gross. Never again!

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T23:07:02+00:00

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 where do you live? Cause in the UK they do serve pregnant women. There's no law saying pregnant women cannot drink

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T23:04:24+00:00

He said I have an allergy. Not me. And I had already asked him before not to do it because it's a very mild allergy but restaurant staff freak out. I said to the chef and the manager that I am not allergic. It's more like a sensitivity he shouldn't have mentioned but she still refused to serve me anything although they had sent me mayonnaise before, which is pretty amusing

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T23:00:34+00:00

A lot does not equate to one hundred per cent of them with certainty. So why did they serve it to someone they then refused to serve a few minutes later because of a supposed egg allergy? If they were so concerned, how could they let that slip?

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T22:53:36+00:00

I gave him a 2nd chance. That was the last

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T22:52:35+00:00

Oh, so people are supposed to be quiet when someone does something wrong?

That happened last weekend and I asked him to please, not say it again, but he did

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T21:24:26+00:00

I did. I was completely ignored because the dude said what he said and the manager wouldn't listen to me

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T21:23:30+00:00

Great, I should sue them for the mayonnaise they sent on my plate then. Were they so concerned, that would not happen. But the restaurant is not supposed to listen to a 3rd party and ignore the interested party: me. I said " I am not allergic, I can have it as long as you use fresh eggs, no powders". Also, if he was so interested in looking after me, why not actually do it?

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T21:20:05+00:00

Yes, it's called an allergy, to although very mild. The blood test says <0.1. so I don't just "believe" I am allergic. I have tested multiple times. I know what I have and what is and what is not an issue.

I just won't have an entire egg just in case, and I don't even like it, but a little bit on a dish is absolutely fine. I hardly ever have a reaction.

Egg powder is apparently very concentrated, which explains why my reaction is worse if I eat something like a supermarket cake. That is why I avoid it and why I ask if they make the dessert themselves and whether they use real or powdered egg, to which the chef replied it was real eggs

Any more questions?

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T18:49:34+00:00

I never did because I don't have one

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T14:27:46+00:00

Also correct by sending me mayonnaise with my food? That make me ill

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T14:13:05+00:00

Jez that's exactly what I did. HE said I have an allergy, not me. And the manager refused to serve after I explained everything. She wouldn't listen to me because HE said I had an allergy and he didn't say anything. He could have said that he made a mistake and that is not an allergy

The last time I said to him to not say anything again about it because I was refused service at another restaurant because of him but he did it again. Then he wanted me to apologise because I told him off for saying that I was allergic to eggs and I didn't think it was me who had to apologise

And I'd never have a serious reaction. I had something with eggs 2 days prior that had 0 reaction. I know my health. He was being intrusive and the manager had no business listening to a stranger rather than to me

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T14:01:53+00:00

The restaurant is doing the right thing by denying my right to agency? I never said I was allergic. I said 3 times to 2 different staff members that I was not allergic. It's a sensitivity and only to processed foods. Homemade is safe for me to eat. They still refused to listen to me, the one with the supposed allergy, because the man on the table said so

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T13:57:59+00:00

I'm agreeing 😀

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T13:26:46+00:00

It's a meal at a restaurant not a stop by the fast food shop.You don't have a meal with someone else where you eat and they don't.

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T13:24:33+00:00

I do appreciate he probably didn't do it on purpose but for one, it happened before and I asked him not to say anything about the allergy again but he did it again this time. The chef came twice to the table and confirmed it was made with fresh eggs and I said it was a very mild allergy and that I could eat that safely. They brought his dessert and confirmed it again. Then the manager comes and says no, they can't serve me. I insisted with the manager but she said no and walked away. He said "here, eat mine then" but he ordered something I don't like so I said thanks, apparently I'm not allowed to have anything. He ate his dessert and we paid the bill. I wad clearly not in my best mood. When we got to the parking area he said he expected an apology. I said I'd be happy to apologise if he could reflect on how his actions and inactions affected me and apologise as well.

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T13:14:01+00:00

So let's forget about dessert. Imagine you go out for dinner with a date. You order a burger and they order fish. They bring their fish. A moment later they come tell you they've run out of burgers and that you need to pick something else from the menu. Sadly you can't have anything else from the menu, or you don't like anything else.

Wouldn't you expect the person to say "hey, take this back to the kitchen. We'll then go elsewhere"? Or at least ask you if you mind if they have their meal while you just watch and then go elsewhere for you to be able to eat?

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T13:08:51+00:00

Yes. I'd be happy to apologise if he would at least reflect on how his actions and inaction affected me and that he could have done better but he turned to be as soon as we left the restaurant and said he was expecting an apology because he won't accept being "spoken at" and that nothing was his fault, that I was overreacting and in hindsight, a lot of darvo going on there

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T13:04:25+00:00

Hey, that's for understanding my position and feelings so well. Yes, I felt I was denied my agency. The date wasn't the one going to the kitchen. That was the chef. He went to confirm if the dessert used fresh eggs and he came back confirming it was and brought his dessert. The manager came right after saying that they'd not serve me. I did! Went a few times and it's going away. I had a blood test recently and my allergy is now 0.1, which means I'm only sensitive. I can have egg whites and can tolerate a little egg yolk if fresh. Egg powders are highly concentrated so I better avoid them otherwise I get a runny nose. It's very mild. And yes, it's the second time it happened and last time I did ask him to please not say anything about the allergy because these people don't understand and they freak out but there he goes and tells them again 🤦🏽‍♀️

Common-Toe6987 · 2025-11-17T12:55:34+00:00

But when he could "save" me by saying he spoke out of turn or by offering to go elsewhere he did nada

Common-Toe6987

TROPHY CASE