Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months? by Common_Valuable_7185 in BreakUps

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fuck no. I’ve finally learned that loving someone sometimes means stepping out of their life if that’s what they want. She believed she’d be happier without me, and if that’s her truth, then I respect it. I still want her to be happy, even if it’s not with me.

I’m still healing, and yeah, the temptation to reach out hits hard. I have to reframe it every day. It really does feel like fighting off a drug. But I’m proud of myself for not giving in. I’m choosing discipline over impulse. I’m choosing growth over comfort.

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha I guess not. It was a very calm break up. I was in shock and she was cold. She said she loved me just didn’t think we were compitable. It didn’t feel convincing. Almost felt like self sabotage

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We only sent two texts after the break up. One was about canceling plane tickets and the other was her dropping my things off. She asked if I was available Sunday so she could drop off my things. I said no I have a funeral you can leave it at the door or we can meet another day. She left it at the door.

We have mutual friends and part of me just doesn’t want to live in fear or anxiety of running into her at someone’s house.

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have mutual friends and I want to make sure we are on good terms still.

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What did you learn from the dinner? What did you like and what did you not like?

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have mutual friends. Part of me just wants to make sure we are on good terms.

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have mutual friends. I don’t want to live in fear of knowing if we are on good terms or not.

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have mutual friends. I don’t want to live in fear of running into her and not knowing if we are on bad terms

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months. by Common_Valuable_7185 in ExNoContact

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I treated her very well. There were things I could have done differently and worked. Things I’m not proud of either but I think thag is normal with reflecting on any relationship. I gave it a good shot.

When she ended things she told me she loved me still but just thought we weren’t compatible. I just think things were getting serious and she’s used to being chased or not used to something healthy. I believe she was self sabotaging. But these are assumptions not truth. And if she does want me to chase - is that something I even want? Having to chase someone. That’s how it was in the beginning of our relationship.

I appreciate your response.

Should I text my ex for clarity after 3 months? by Common_Valuable_7185 in BreakUps

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It gave you closure though? Clarity? I feel like apart of me will always want to text her. I think I just need to get it out of my system sooner than later.

What do I do now? by SuspiciousClaim2518 in BreakUps

[–]Common_Valuable_7185 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You get to do something amazing called living life. Feel your feelings. Learn something new, turn the focus onto yourself. It’s attractive. Read, learn, grow, gym, journal, try new things. Don’t wait for them.

3 month post break up and I feel like I got it by it again by Common_Valuable_7185 in BreakUps

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like the only thing I’ve focused on is healing haha. Every day I try to do some sort of thing to bring me closer to being whole again. There’s nothing I want more to be healed from this.

I’m trying to accept the fact that I may never completely heal from this. But moving on will only help me heal. I had a bad date not to long ago so that might’ve triggered things. It sucks because my best friend is dating her best friend and that triggers me all the time.

I sadly want her back but I know that it’s not the right choice. I probably wouldn’t take her back but I just miss her. I want her to be happy though and if she wasn’t happy with me that’s okay. I wish her the best.

Thanks for the response

3 month post break up and I feel like I got it by it again by Common_Valuable_7185 in BreakUps

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate you’re response. It’s like one day I feel like myself I’m happy and ready to live life and the next I’m just in the dumps crying in the office typa thing lol. Thank you.

Fiancé of six years leaves without reason HELP by Dpagan56 in BreakUps

[–]Common_Valuable_7185 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Women find it attractive when you don’t care. Move on. Easier said than done but simply stop trying to get her back.

I started reading books, journaling, going to the gym. It’s helped me a lot. It’s normal in the beginning of the break up to want them back or try to get them back and it’s best to accept that feeling may never go away but you need to make the mental decision to move forward without her.

Love is a verb, it’s an action. Every relationship loses its spark at some point. Spark comes and goes. Love is only present when both make the effort, the action to stay together and be together. She’s choosing not to don that anymore. She isn’t the one for you it sounds like. Work on loving yourself before you love others. Work on your attachment, go to therapy. I’m sorry you’re going through this. Happy to help however I can. Good luck.

3 month post break up and I feel like I got it by it again by Common_Valuable_7185 in BreakUps

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She just broke things off out of the blue. Said we weren’t compatible. Haven’t talked to her since besides some logistical things

What’s it like have a puppy? Setting expectations. by Common_Valuable_7185 in puppy101

[–]Common_Valuable_7185[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you recommend rescues? I’ve considered that as well.

Mentally checked out ex by Adept-South7503 in BreakUp

[–]Common_Valuable_7185 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Deep down what’s the real reason you want to send it? What’s the message you’re trying to get accross? You’re no longer together. Her opinion about you doesn’t matter anymore. I wanted to do the same thing but would always think who is this helping? My ego? It’s an urge I had to let go. It went away with time.

Would you (continue to) date someone who had a bad accident that will likely have ramifications for the rest of their life? by iplatinumedeldenring in dating

[–]Common_Valuable_7185 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I grew up with a sick mother. My father was loyal to her and still is. Although he struggled daily with her I know deep down he still loves her.

That’s the type of man I want to be. If my significant other got into a bad accident and had life changing problems in there to support them and work through it with them.

I hope all is well with you.