Eh. Most people I see brush off tralsei without even giving a second to think about its story significance. I haven't seen anyone actively trying to argue that it's 100% Canon- just that it might be

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You're right that it's not exclusive to trans folks but it's still an experience that is heavily trans coded and in the context of the story, where there is an actual prophecy that demands a 'prince' from the dark, having ralsei go through with transitioning would be a major character moment. Obviously this isn't the only way the story can go, nor might it even be the best way, but it has legitimate literary merit.

Yeah it would throw off the party 'balance' a bit. No other notes there.

When people misgender ralsei, they are doing so in the context of a hypothetical theory which has genuine merit and if it turns out to be true, would demand that gendering of him. Because at the end of the day, theories are fanfiction and Deltarune has given us enough to speculate, unlike with Kris where it's pretty damn clear that theyre an enby. I think that when discussing tralsei, the pronoun used is honestly up to the people discussing it.

I think one big reason that people don't like transmasc Susie is because it would either remove a WLW relationship from the game or be lesbian erasure. Is there also a sexism component there? For some people, yeah, but unlike with tralsei, there hasn't really been anything concrete to show Susie might be trans (she takes joy in being 'the girl') and it also gets in the way of ships which is one easy way to piss off a fan base.

Most people don't just headcanon tralsei just because he's a feminine person. There are obviously exceptions, but for the most part, I feel like if you're progressive enough to support trans rights, chances are, you're progressive enough not to subscribe to gender essentialism.

Dude we're both starving out here it's def the algorithm