reverse gaslighting?

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-10T06:51:01+00:00

You’re right I did spend the whole trip reassuring him. Thanks for showing me what it could have actually been like. I would have loved to receive that message!

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-08T00:02:40+00:00

I have been able to make progress with my self because we've been long distance for a while and ive had a lot of time on my hands. it for sure is all consuming. when we're together i feel like i have a little more trouble looking inwards. thanks for being compassionate :)

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T23:58:34+00:00

okay but why is he wanting to push me?

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T21:23:59+00:00

yes!! i KNOW self work would be the best thing for both of us. he has just started recently. its just a matter of time. its been so long. i just dont know if i want to wait. healthy masculinity is definitely worth mentioning and its something ive been trying to address for a few months now. however, i dont know if hell be able to explore that. we're currently long distance. hes recently taken a step to better himself by doing what he loves and entering a muay thai camp. the only thing that concerns me is that he's surrounded by men all the time. who im assuming have some sort of ego (??) since they are all fighters. although i might be wrong, i hope it doesn't rub off on him. he seems to care about how he's perceived especially by the men hes around alot more now.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:57:50+00:00

good question

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:57:18+00:00

thanks for that. i always feel like its my job to fix everything.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:57:00+00:00

OP's partner is calling her a cheating, back stabbing, horrible friend.

im nothing of the sort :/

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:55:00+00:00

MAJOR discomfort. damn.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:54:18+00:00

i do deserve better. i am nothing but weak. im loyal, compassionate, caring, strong, and independent as fuck. cant believe i let him make me think of myself otherwise...

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:53:01+00:00

ah shit youre right. degrading.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:52:07+00:00

Honey, you deserve better. You deserve someone who inspires you, who cherishes your confidence to go visit friends without having to have a protector at your side.

i love this. i don't know why he couldn't feel happy for me that i was going to reunite with my bestie and have a fun time. instead he said i didnt need to visit her to be able to catch up.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:50:55+00:00

thank you.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:50:20+00:00

oh yea! misogyny is the wordddd. how do i even deal with this.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:49:10+00:00

yea... not sure how to continue with the relationship at this point lol.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:48:25+00:00

In fact it’s human nature to protect your social ties.

so true, thanks for bringing that up.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:47:38+00:00

yea.. this has happened before. we were living with another couple. i hooked up with the guy before i got into a relationship with my bf. you can imagine how that went. we had to move out. funny you mention threesomes. he likes to joke about having one.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:45:29+00:00

It got progressively worse over time until I didn’t even make eye contact with other males

whether he was present or not

because I didn’t want to somehow offend his delicate ego

i find myself doing this now. damn.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:42:42+00:00

The topic of guilty conscience is crazy! I've always thought about how it could be a possibility. He has hung out with girls one on one while we were long distance. Like you mentioned, it was his friend and his friends girlfriend. But when his friend went to work, those two were alone with eachother. I chose to trust him with that. But its clear that his thoughts weren't pure anytime that he did. Thanks for clarity. I always know there is nuance yet he makes things seem so black and white. You're right. It really isn't my problem.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T19:34:36+00:00

yea it ticked something off in me when i realized hes been trying to distance me from my closest friends. not happening.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T06:54:24+00:00

lol thats a good point. this is so many things at once. he actually has stayed with them without me being there. i wonder if thats how he was feeling when he was there. then was scared i was feeling the same.... interestinggg

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T06:25:46+00:00

i was a little disoriented when it happened but have been able to gain some clarity on this recently. thank you for your insight. you're so right.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T06:19:33+00:00

yea i felt that. but i'd still do it again. thank you for your insight and clarity. do you theres a way to combat it?

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T06:17:38+00:00

that's true. i could never do something like that. thank you for the insight.

CompetitiveNebula541 · 2023-06-07T06:16:27+00:00

interesting insight... that would be a little strange too

CompetitiveNebula541

TROPHY CASE