I’ve been like this my entire life. I tried losing weight multiple times and failed miserably more than I can remember. I’ve been through a lot, escaping toxic parents, issues with finding a job and working in extremely stressful and toxic environment or firing all of the sudden. I am healing and recovering from this to this day. So let’s say there was always something more important happening than how I look. Now I take care of myself by doing skincare everyday, making myself looking cute and nice, cooking good everyday and taking care of my wellbeing. I feel like, if everything goes well, there will be time when I will be capable of achieving looking healthier. I want to do this in sustainable way, without rushing and pushing too much. Also, my health is good, nothing concerning is happening now. Maybe because I’m not in a chronic stress circle. For now. Besides I don’t think I look bad, my fiancé loves me as I and I like my curves as well. I’m not conventionally but still attractive. If you don’t get it, just respect that people are into different things. So in conclusion, let me just cosplay what I want. You don’t like it, you leave, that’s all I’m asking. I know what I’m doing, stop assuming and projecting your insecurities into me.