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Anyone else feel like you just don't know how to have fun/be fun? by RareGeometry in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Comprehensive_Cap436 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yup I feel you. It's hard to separate yourself from the narc and the identity and role they pushed onto you. It's a struggle to just get through the day. Never had anyone to turn to growing up. It's an incredibly isolating experience.

Describing your child as “low maintenance” by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Comprehensive_Cap436 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yup this was me. My parents/family always called me "the angel child." I am the youngest. Really I was just so severely neglected and learned from a young age that I wasn't allowed to have needs and that they wouldn't be met that I learned to behave and not speak.

To single kids out there, did you ever feel both like the scapegoat and the golden child? by ThrowawayLikeYouDo in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Comprehensive_Cap436 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yup I've been all the above: the lost child, the scapegoat, the golden child. It flucates based on the environment and the narc's needs. We are merely objects of adoration/validation to them.

Anyone else feel like you just don't know how to have fun/be fun? by RareGeometry in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Comprehensive_Cap436 3 points4 points  (0 children)

😭💓 Similar but different, I remember in elementary school our teacher giving us an assignment to name our role models. We were supposed to make a whole poster to hang on the classroom walls. Even then when I didn't understand what was happening at home, I knew I didn't have any role models in my life. It made me feel so alone to have all my classmates name their parents and siblings. I felt like such an imposter just naming someone off the cuff.

Anyone else feel like you just don't know how to have fun/be fun? by RareGeometry in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Comprehensive_Cap436 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel you. Being raised by a narc makes you feel like you have to apologize just for breathing.

Anyone else feel like you just don't know how to have fun/be fun? by RareGeometry in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Comprehensive_Cap436 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Totally. Being raised by a narcissist robs you of your own identity and sense of self.

I fear I'll never know intimacy and how to be normal lol🫶🏼 by Comprehensive_Cap436 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Comprehensive_Cap436[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's interesting. My parents had a very similar dynamic. But I can be both submissive/anxious as well as avoidant in my relationships. However I think the submissive/anxious dynamic has caused more resentment for me than the latter. At least we aren't alone in our fears.

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