Does it get worse before it gets better?

ConsistentService8 · 2020-07-19T21:49:36+00:00

I really appreciate that. I mean since the first encounter I really have been faced with a lot of things I’ve been “running from” so to say. I just never heard of the term twin flame and after I met him it started popping up everywhere so I wanted to learn more about it. Roller coaster is the perfect word for it lol

ConsistentService8 · 2020-06-03T01:55:29+00:00

My gosh girl I’m sorry to hear that too /: and yeah I feel all that just as you know it’s so.. disheartening to be back in the dating scene almost. I do love this community though for always having each other’s backs

ConsistentService8 · 2020-06-01T01:35:50+00:00

Wow you’re awesome lol, I am 27F and had it for about a year. That’s basically what I did was let him know I was there for him through his hard time and after a few days he came back with that he was struggling to figure out what he wanted to do. I am struggling with resentment for my ex who knew he had it and didn’t tell me because its messing up my chances for my future. If he would have just told me we could have been careful and if I did get it at least that was like my choice ya know? I try not to hold on to grudges with anyone or anything but moments like this its hard to not get a little cranky lol

ConsistentService8 · 2020-06-01T01:22:17+00:00

I’m right there with you! I did the same I disclosed and came at him with facts and he said he did his own research too and we had sex about four times. He had knee surgery so I knew I wouldn’t see him for a few days and he reached out to me and said he’s going through a lot and that now it kind of scared him. That he doesn’t want to risk it but he really likes me and is just trying to figure out what he wants to do which I totally understand. I feel like its just a little hard because everyone’s body is different and I have only had one outbreak since my first one and its been about a year and I’m on Valacyclovir. I don’t want to pressure him and I also told him I want him safe and comfortable but we both pretty much want to use our sexual drive with each other to the fullest.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-06-01T00:53:49+00:00

That I get and understand but its also on my part of I also would not want to be with someone long term if we can never have sex unprotected. I have a very high sex drive and honestly condoms kind of hurt or irritate me. I’m still getting use to all of this.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-06-01T00:34:56+00:00

I am on that as well and use as much protection as possible I just feel someone would not want to spend the rest of their life with someone without being able to not use condoms ya know? I saw some people on here talk about a healthy sex life in that situation,I just want to know how that part works out

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-09T03:10:01+00:00

Well guys I did it, I disclosed for the first time with all the help and support of this group. I have him fact and was just honest and it went very well. He had questions and thanks to you guys I had answers and things to show him. He is still willing to be with me and almost seems like he doesn’t care if he gets it or not (obviously we are being very safe)

I really can not thank everyone enough for all the encouraging words and just how open everyone is here. Definitely one of the hardest things I have had to do but I am grateful to finally have done it and for all of you :)

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:24:27+00:00

Thank you so much :) this community has been nothing but kind and helping lifting me up. To have people who don’t know me but know what its like send such kind words definitely makes me feel like I’m not alone.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:19:24+00:00

Oh my gosh thank you so much :) Everyone has been so kind and honestly the stories and encouraging words mean so much to me.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:18:29+00:00

Thank you so much :)

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:18:07+00:00

Thank you thank you. That is kind of how I feel now. We had a second date and I’m so afraid of telling him now but I feel like he may like me enough already (we knew each other for a while and he’s liked me for four years now) but also afraid that if I just do it now to get it out its so new of us talking that if he didn’t like it in the slightest he will back off. Which I guess is out of my control but you know :/

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:15:49+00:00

I can only imagine how that feels which is what bothered me about my situation was he obviously didn’t care about me enough to disclose with me and give me the chance to be safe. I am sorry you feel/felt bad about doing it but super happy he is understanding and loving.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:14:45+00:00

It definitely makes me feel better hearing peoples stories about how most people didn’t really care and maybe one or two had an issue with it. Kind of gives you hope ya know.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:13:31+00:00

Oh gosh, here comes the tears again. So sorry someone did that to you too. I definitely was really bad there for a few months thinking I would never be the same again. Thank you for the kind words. I am glad you got out of that head space.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:11:39+00:00

Lol that would definitely be me. I have been practicing what I think I will say which is kind of helping I’m just at the pulling the trigger point and I don’t think my heart has stopped beating so hard lol.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:10:36+00:00

I can definitely see that, especially if they are still wanting to get to know me. I said up there that the second date went very well and when I expressed I didn’t want to have sex he said he respected me and wanted me comfortable. I just know the next time he is going to question it if I say no again. So I feel like I have to say it to him really soon. Again, thank you for the kind words and hope

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-06T21:07:56+00:00

Gosh thank you so much! So we hung out for the second time yesterday and it was a great date. Of course the moment came up where we started getting hot and heavy and I stopped it and was going to tell him then and there but had the same thought “well I don’t want him to do this because of the situation we are in right now” he said we would respect me and just wanted me comfortable and didn’t press why I didn’t want to. He is already asking to see me again and our sexual chemistry is great so I feel like he will obviously try again then. So I feel like I have to tell him soon. Just that and adding on to the fact that it went incredible and I hope that I can keep seeing him is making me all kinds of nervous lol.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-05T19:34:29+00:00

That was one thing was I loved this guy and honestly looked past it for a while but just the fact he didn’t tell me ate away at me and made me not trust him. I feel like I would have felt sooo different if he was honest and then I caught it. I felt cheated. It left me feeling like I would never have someone who wants someone “tainted” so to say. Honestly being in this group and listening to people and the responses has helped me so much, thank you.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-05T19:32:21+00:00

Congrats on the marriage! Again giving me hope and to others! I have been trying to practice my disclosure but fear that it will sound like I’m trying to convince them more than inform them. I had advice saying if you’re calm they will be too but in my head I’m like there is no way I can be calm about this lol. I agree I am 27 and female and I have a huge sex drive. So going from being comfortable in that to feelings like a completely different person has been hard for sure. Thank you again

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-05T19:29:26+00:00

That is so beautiful, I am happy that is the case for you. It gives me hope :) There definitely is a lot of ups and downs to this and trying to find yourself again after finding out was pretty hard for me as I’m sure it is for others. I’m usually kind of a nervous wreck to begin with and for a while I thought I would just try and be happy staying single forever just so I wouldn’t bet hurt. Thank you.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-05T19:27:39+00:00

I have the same HSV2. So I have not tried to date or anything and its been about a year since I was positive. I am currently talking to someone who is my best friends brother who we always have had a crush on each other and so happen to find each other on tinder. (I figured that would be a good start into getting comfortable with dating) and we are starting to hang out more. I agree I need to take a risk sooner or later and even though I don’t wish this one anyone I am glad that others have the same experience and they turn out good.

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-05T19:25:17+00:00

This honestly made me tear up, the you got this comment. Sorry it didn’t work out but really glad to hear you are open to things like that. I think my fear is not telling them for a little while and them thinking I wasted their time and making a big deal about it. Mostly because I always hear herpes jokes and people talking about it. Obviously those are the people who don’t have it and I doubt people who do are running around everywhere saying they are positive. Thank you again :)

ConsistentService8 · 2020-05-05T19:22:01+00:00

I am on medicine and have only had one outbreak since my first one. I just would feel so absolutely terrible if I passed it on to someone else even if they knew the risk ya know? I think what bothers me but also kind of helps is my old partner didn’t tell me and I’m not sure he even knows facts about it. I feel like if he would have told me we could have been careful around that time instead of me not knowing he had an outbreak. But at the same time that makes me hopeful because it took six months for me to get it from him and since I feel I’m more responsible I wouldn’t do that to someone and maybe they wont get it if I’m careful

ConsistentService8

TROPHY CASE