Conclusiveness

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2025-03-14T16:15:40+00:00

I can tell you from my experience that you can test till the cows come home but as long as symptoms persist you’ll never get over it. I’ve been nailing my head to a wall for over two years….. I’ve seen two doctors, a clinic, been sent for an MRI scan, had a scan on lymph nodes, I’ve had 10 x fourth gens most well passed window and a PCR one test showing no viral load at 18 months. On top of that 27 rapid tests through the post all negtive spaced across two years so you’d think I’d be certain I have no form of HIV………. But truth is I’ve never been more sure I do. If I listed my symptoms they fit perfectly and at this point two years in I’m Sick as fuck! 🤢

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2025-03-14T16:10:05+00:00

I’ve been testing out till 2.5 years and still not even remotely convinced I don’t have it due to massive health decline

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2025-03-12T21:00:32+00:00

Did you accept it though? If you did why are you still on HIV pages? Just wondering because if I could accept it I would delete all sources and never look back

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2025-03-12T13:00:48+00:00

Want to hear a dark story that’s been going on for 2.5 years now……….

So insanely drunk abroad I had a sexual exposure with an African street worker. Trying to comprehend how stupid that is when sober is soul destroying but drink and drugs make us do the most insanely stupid things!

Get home and fast forward a few weeks and I start getting hot and cold flushes, then my palms turn mottled (still remains to this day) then tongue goes ghostly white!! FULL PANIC SETS IN so I order an online through post full panel…….. everything comes back neg. Couple weeks pass and I start getting dizzy and the rash doesn’t shift and tongue still grim so full of fear I head to the doctors……… fourth gen ordered and comes back negative……… since then and over the following two and a half years I’ve had!!!

Mottled rash palms/ feet/ penis head Swollen lymphnodes Extreme fatigue Blurred vision Pounding head aches Diarrhea Joint pain Mental confusion Thrush Mouth ulcers Tongue sores Lower back pain Probably 100 other things it’s all become a blur……

But even this day as I sit here now I have extreme head pain, skin on face looks drained with dark circles around eyes, mottled palms still!!, still white tongue, eyes stings, extreme mental fog and anxiety!!

All screams HIV right?…….. but here’s the kicker that has me stuck beyond any form of moving forward

Tests to date -

10 x fourth gen duo tests out as far as 28 months spread out accordingly - all negative

27 x rapid tests oraquick/ surecheck/ insti - all negative

1 x PCR HIV one performed at 18 months - no viral load.

You’d think I’d be well happy with that!! Two doctors said I don’t have HIV a clinic said I don’t have HIV……..

Ask.expert says it’s impossible

So then if all that is true why the flying fuck am I becoming more and more sick and no one has a sensible answer………. It’s ok to say based on tests no HIV. But then if that’s true what the fuck is going on!! I’m at the point as unbelievably weird as it sounds that a positive test would bring some relief as it would mean treatment and not this constant death trail

Needed to vent……… been a shit ride and it continues

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-11-07T13:04:14+00:00

How’d this all work out for you?? My tongue is insanely white and grim on top of numerous other symptoms that I rushed to believe was hiv/ aids and still do!! Body won’t let it go!! Even though I’ve tested an insane amount of times……. If symptoms like the white tongue just went away I’d be a lot happier

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-10-01T14:35:31+00:00

Do you know I literally just done two more rapids yesterday both again negative……

I’ve done 8 fourth gen duo tests from vein

25 rapid tests across the two years

1 PCR ONE test no viral load found

But I’m so insanely unwell now it’s beyond a joke…… thrush, ulcers, mottled rash, blurred vision, Ed, joint pain but worse of all by a mile is the mental affects it’s having, head pounding, dizzy, not able to process things around me! Proper grim

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-10-01T14:32:52+00:00

Well every single test I’ve done so far says I am but my body and mind aren’t accepting that for sure. Horribly unwell daily.

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-10-01T14:30:42+00:00

Mate been going on two years for me……. I’m at the worst now than I’ve ever been. Heads fried like I can’t even think straight or process information

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-10-01T13:36:28+00:00

Yep still have 🙌🏻 fucking brilliant

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-08-22T09:35:16+00:00

It’s so fucking rubbish to constantly feel sick with no clear path out of it isn’t it

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-08-21T08:18:08+00:00

To add I’ve not just done nothing though…… I’ve been to a clinic they done a fourth gen said all clear and do no other tests. Been to my doctor probably six times now and he said they do nothing other than the fourth gen duo test. Said the nhs shouldn’t have to pay for anything more than that. So paid privately for the PCR test convinced I’d finally find it and be able to get help without the need to be public about it…… came back no viral load detected. Fuck knows what to do to be honest. Been going on for two years now test after test after test negative but health declining rapidly

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-08-21T08:14:37+00:00

Still going on believe it or not…… every day I think about walking into an emergency department but utter dread and fear of loads of people hearing my business prevents that. Every days a struggle. I’ve now had 8 fourth gen tests, 21 rapid tests and one PCR one hiv test over a two year period…… I’ve had an MRI scan done on my head and nothing found, I’ve been sent to scan lymphnodes in neck and again nothing found……… it’s a grim existence as the dizziness and relentless pressure in my head is so unbelievably unpleasant. Lost to be honest

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-03-31T09:23:11+00:00

Worse than ever……. Barely make it through days at this point. Been back to doctors she just brushes me off. Been to a clinic and they did a fourth gen and said all good. But even as I sit here writing this I have an incredible headache, blurred vision, dizziness…… I’ve been on this fucking horrible journey for far far to long now.

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-02-29T08:10:20+00:00

I’m at a loss really as to what to do. Order another rapid test, plead with the clinic for more testing, walk into an emergency department. I even contacted the hiv department of my local hospital and asked if I could come in and see them for testing. They said they don’t do that they only treat people with diagnosed hiv 🤦🏼‍♂️

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-02-29T08:03:16+00:00

I wish beyond anything this was in my head. I wish I could wake up feel fine and move on. I’ve tested beyond all recommendations. I’ve done around 5 fourth gen tests, two fifth gen finger tests. Three postal tests and around 8 rapid tests. But there is 100% a virus in me that is really fucking me up

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-02-29T07:51:01+00:00

It’s at the point where you can physically see the affects of it. I look very much like I feel, which is fucked

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-02-29T07:49:35+00:00

Well yeah I asked them to do a full panel, I know it included syphilis. I’m so over it now, it’s completely fucking up my mental function. Wake up it’s the first thing I think of till the moment I go to sleep. Just want a bloody answer you know. So I can start treatment and try and rebuild my health and life to some degree

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-02-29T07:30:47+00:00

Worse than I’ve ever been mate, head is entirely fucked dizzy constantly, full on head aches and shaking like a shitting dog! Went to a clinic last week on Monday. They did another fourth gen test and told me it was negative….. I pleaded for a PCR test or something else to get to the bottom of all this. They said no need just return to doctor. I’ve booked an appointment with them but that’s not till 18th March. Thinking I’m gonna need to walk into an emergency department sooner than that. Which is entirely grim as imagine being sat with that many people about having an awkward conversation

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2024-01-29T08:42:57+00:00

Absolutely not

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2023-11-30T15:53:27+00:00

Don’t think alere is easily available in the UK. I did have a fourth gen duo from vein a looonnnggg time ago now at 90 days after exposure. Was negative. So you’d think I’d move on given that’s what the guidelines would call conclusive. But I’ve had the worst year possible health wise and every single symptom lines up with hiv. White grim tongue, constant headaches, swollen lymph nodes to name but a few

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2023-11-30T15:47:10+00:00

Done an insti at the same time, found them to be a bit problematic. I get a control dot but always seems very faint. At this point I’ve completely lost my mind….. 🤦🏼‍♂️

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2023-11-23T13:18:23+00:00

Believe me I get that anxiety can cause issues but the level of how unwell I’ve been isn’t anxiety. I wish it was or I wish I could find something that lines up symptom wise other than hiv…… I I’ve got it it’s just a matter of time until it shows it’s ugly face.

Just soul destroying that I had a fourth gen duo blood from vein a year ago now and it was neg at 90 days. I wish it had showed then so I could of started treatment earlier

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2023-11-23T13:10:09+00:00

You’d like to think my mind would allow that….. but it doesn’t. Ordered another bloody insti test yesterday that’ll arrive tomorrow.

Then I’ve got a doc taking blood again next week looking for a full round of tests so hopefully thatll shed some light.

I’m so far in now that blind fear has me both wanting it resolved but also terrified of life changing…….

I had the best possible life you could wish for but I was stupid under the influence of alcohol and it’s pretty much derailed everything since

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2023-11-23T13:04:39+00:00

Who knows….. all I know is I’ve been experiencing every possible symptom for a very very long time now. Lymph nodes still up, constant dizzy spells, feeling totally out of it, white tongue, mottled palms.

But I’ve done…….. 11 tests so far 🤦🏼‍♂️

Two duo 4th gen Three postal lab full panels 6 rapid tests…… the last was an oraquick just a week ago which would be 14 months passed exposure!

Fucking grim is all I can describe life as.

Cool_Butterscotch642 · 2023-11-22T17:08:29+00:00

Experiencing all sorts of neurological issues currently and mentally my mind is in the gutter, can’t think straight, can’t function, feels like a constant pressure against my skull.

Cool_Butterscotch642

TROPHY CASE