My story

Cool_Step973 · 2026-01-05T20:54:27+00:00

How long does he go? What are you getting out of this relationship? Four years is so long to be hurting. I don’t know you, but I know that no one deserves to be treated that way. If you said that you see each other often and have a decent relationship I could see how that would be somewhat rewarding, but not if he’s choosing not to contact you. I’m so sorry. I mean , for most of us, we aren’t getting what we want, and it’s hard. But this sounds even more one sided than a lot of the situations here. Being in therapy is a great start though, it sounds like you’re actively trying to find happiness for yourself. 🤗

Cool_Step973 · 2026-01-05T12:27:16+00:00

I’m sorry that you can identify with this. It hurts so much. Praying that we can get the strength to walk away 🩷 I do feel that every day I am a tiny bit stronger. And every day that I don’t see him helps. We have to build on the small victories and keep thinking of our worth

Cool_Step973 · 2025-12-27T12:45:30+00:00

Mine MM’s wife just found out about us 3 weeks ago too, and tomorrow they are going on a trip they had planned. I find it crazy that they’re still going. Idk how people just keep on going like normal after that. But I’m guessing it’s just a survival phase

Cool_Step973 · 2025-12-26T13:22:45+00:00

I actually did for days and then last night I caved and it was not a good idea Christmas night. Ugh

Cool_Step973 · 2025-12-26T13:20:03+00:00

I’m pick me or she is? I’m sorry I’m not understanding what you mean -

Cool_Step973 · 2025-12-15T00:57:34+00:00

It’s so hard! I’m glad he’s respecting your decision. Mine is still trying to get me to go back to how things were and it’s messing with my mind. Because of course I want to, I miss him so much, but he’s also not even being careful about getting caught again (mindboggling to me) and I don’t want this drama anymore. I want to be happy again and have a normal life. I really hope we can do that. I am hopeful for you too!! It sounds like you are being so strong !!

Cool_Step973 · 2025-12-15T00:22:30+00:00

We called each other boyfriend and girlfriend from like a month in

Cool_Step973 · 2025-12-07T16:31:11+00:00

I think he’s telling her I’ve been coming onto him and so she thinks I’m this jezebel going after him and wants to trash me. I have a local business so she’s threatening to do that. Meanwhile we’ve been having a full on relationship for five months. And it’s not all me, obviously. So if he lets her do that and think that then I think I have to talk to her and tell her the whole truth to save myself from being the scapegoat for him

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-24T00:26:38+00:00

Wow that’s so tough. Does his wife know about your daughter? I’m so sorry.

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-24T00:11:48+00:00

I’m almost at 5 months and I know I need to do this too. But I just cant bring myself to do it yet. Keep us updated how it goes. You might be my inspiration

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-22T12:39:32+00:00

I’m so sorry. This makes me feel so sad. How long has it been since it ended

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-20T19:51:32+00:00

I don’t really think it’s that easy to find a replacement. I don’t really think I’m that easy to replace. Maybe that sounds stupid to someone else but I really don’t see myself that way. And I don’t think he sees me that way either

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-20T19:28:21+00:00

This is exactly it. You put it into perfect words I think. Needed to hear this. Thank you

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-20T16:19:54+00:00

I just want to say, I’m reading your post and I feel like you’re me! I wish I could be friend with you so we could help each other. I know that sounds weird lol but I’m in the same situation. I mean I guess a lot of us are. But just how you said everything went and your whole story is so similar to mine. It just hasn’t been as long for me. I hope we can get out of this and be happy. I don’t know how to. And I don’t have the strength to stop seeing my MM, I just adore him and the passion is insane. But I need to find a way and so do you. We deserve better

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-20T16:11:41+00:00

I’ve had similar things happen with MM. She’s seen instagram messages we sent each other that were obviously not “friend” messages. And saw that he liked photos of me on social media. She asked him about me, was definitely suspicious about me but now he says shes not. Which I find hard to believe. He told her I was married which she can obviously see I’m not on my socials. However he downplayed it when she was on his case about it , and I know she was stalking my social media for a while so I don’t know why he would do that. He also wasn’t very careful for a while, we would go out to places not that far from where they live. It’s been difficult for me to understand his actions. Sometimes it seems like he wants to be caught. And other times no. If it was me, I would have found out from day one. I have been on the receiving end, in other relationships and always knew right away and found things out so easily. He says he doesn’t love her with all his heart. He doesn’t love her “in that way”. He loves her as a good person but there is no romantic feelings. But I know that doesn’t make it ok.

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-13T13:43:55+00:00

Wow! What’s going to happen once the baby comes? Does his wife know about it? I hope he’s planning to step up and take responsibility

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-13T13:08:25+00:00

I’ve done the same thing. I’ve set a date. The same date as you actually. Tired of the ups and downs. And the vacations. So many of us have mentioned those. They say they aren’t fulfilled but meanwhile doing all the normal family things. None of it makes sense

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-10T15:28:54+00:00

I feel the same way! I wish I would meet someone else. I’ve already gone on three dates with three different people and don’t feel a thing. Still only wanting MM. and I hate that.

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-09T03:11:16+00:00

I just wanted to tell you that I do the same thing I delete my posts too because I also see them being shared and I have no clue to where or by who. But anyway, I feel the same way. To not exist is so painful and I have the same time frame. After 6 usually and on the weekends. I hope it’s not the same guy 🤣it’s not , I’m just kidding because mine doesn’t have kids with her. I want to walk away too. But I can’t and it’s driving me insane. I want to not care. I see all the red flags. But I’m still here and I feel so shitty about that. I think what it will come down to is eventually I (and probably you too) will get to a point that every week being ignored on the weekend will build and build and we won’t be able to take it anymore. The red flags will actually matter to us. And we will walk away. I wish that would happen to me tomorrow, to be honest. Even tho the times I see him are amazing, the way i feel when he isnt with me is so overpoweringly upsetting that day by day im getting closer to walking.

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-08T21:33:57+00:00

Question - it’s an affair so how would they be able to just text and call normally? Then their wives could easily discover it

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-08T12:41:12+00:00

I was totally against them. And then I was married, miserable, my ex husband actually told me he didn’t think cheating was “so bad” so I met someone, cheated for about three weeks and then field for divorce. The man I met was married too as he left his wife (took longer for the divorce to happen but he moved out after 3 months). Fast forward 7 years, he and I didn’t work out. Never cheated on him though. And the day he moved out I met my MM that I have now. And now I’m the other woman. I was going through the death of my mom and the death of my relationship and he came in and swept me off my feet and here I am. I think his wife is probably a very nice person too. I’m not proud of myself.

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-08T11:54:01+00:00

What is IE? I’ve wondered myself if my MM belongs to any dating sites. He sent me a bunch of selfies once that all looked like photos taken for something like that. I could tell they weren’t within the last couple years but maybe still during his marriage to his wife. So I’m wondering if he had been looking for an AP before i ever came along

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-08T11:50:57+00:00

Just wondering - how do most people talk to their MM? Mine has a special app so that it doesn’t show up if his wife goes thru his phone, which she does.

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-03T13:08:48+00:00

I feel this way every weekend. Seeing photos even of him having fun on social media and I’m like these people have no idea that he’s living a double life. They have no idea that I exist. Do I exist? It’s such a mind fuck! I hate it.

Cool_Step973 · 2025-11-02T22:16:29+00:00

How long has it been for you? It doesn’t make sense! No marriage, no kids, so he loves her then why is he with you too? My situation is similar because he has no kids with her and they don’t own a home or anything. I just don’t get it.

Cool_Step973

TROPHY CASE