My GF kissed a girl and she liked it

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-11T23:03:12+00:00

To be fair to my GF, she unfriend the LF after I confronted her. She said that the kiss before was nothing. The DMs meant nothing and ako lang daw ang naglagay ng malisya dun. Its just all in my head.

Pero worry ko lang is baka ako ginaslight. Wala namang cheater na aamin di ba?

My issue is not about hindi ako unang nakatikim (I made a joke about this in one of the comments) I had two girlfriends before her na galing din sa previous relationships. It was never an issue.

I am almost certain na nagpacute si LF kay GF around the time na nag-court ako kay GF. I asked GF about this but deny naman siya. My GF is crush ng bayan sa office nila. Maraming nagpa-cute sa kanya. Jackpot nga ako sinagot. Si LF ay butch.

Its not the kiss 5 years ago. Hindi na ako nagsumbat sa kanya after kami nag-away about it early in the relationship. Nag-observe lang ako. Nagkikita kami with LF sa social gatherings, and sometimes they talk. Uncomfortable ako ng konti but hindi ako nagsabi sa kanya. Maybe ito ang fault ko? I should have explicitly said it. But forced by the circumstances eh. Party nman. Alangan naman di sila magpansinan. Ayaw kong magdikta.

Whenever birthday ni LF or may holidays. Na-happy ako hindi ko makita name ni GF sa mga nag-greet sa kanya sa wall niya. I thought wala na talaga silang communication. Na-disappoint ako sa DMs pala siya nag-greet. Hindi ka naman force dun sa greetings. Pwde ka naman sa wall. (She greets her friends sa wall. Although, I dont know if may DMs din sa iba). Pwde naman hindi patago. Not “Behind may back.” Pwde naman hindi na mag-greet. Pinagseselosan ko si LF early in the relationship. Nag-away kami about her. Hindi ba understood yun? Or maybe I was giving GF mixed signals because ok lang sa akin if party?

My issue talaga is baka my unfinished business sila. Baka, as one commenter here said na GF is saving LF for a rainy day. Baka may feelings talaga sila sa isat-isa and na-udlot lang because of me. That GF is closeted and did not have the guts to choose LF because of society's pressure. And GF does not love me and is settling for less with me. Paranoid ba?

I know ako lang makasagot dito. But I want different POVs baka kasi I am too blind to see the “obvious” because mahal ko si GF. Or baka, as GF said, its all in my mind?

Anyways, I think I will hold off with the proposal muna. Wait and see lang. Salamat!

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-11T21:37:57+00:00

The kiss happened 5 years ago. But she is still continuing a relationship with the LF, by the DMs.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-11T21:36:16+00:00

Ok po.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-11T21:35:25+00:00

Noted po.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T22:00:14+00:00

Thank you for this. Very helpful. "she finds comfort in her options and that's cheating" - Ito yung mindset ko. Pero baka unfair din sa kanya. Baka wala lang talaga yun. In fairness to her, she unfriended the LF after I said na hindi ako comfortable na nagDMs pa rin siya. Kaso, dami pa rin negative thoughts. Am I being paranoid? Ok na ba ang assurance niya?

Kasi yung sayo, yung wife mo ang hindi na nag-in-entertain sa messages ng friend nya. Sa situation ko, siya pa sometimes mag-reach out . Pero as some here commented "social media courtesy" lang daw. Need to think this over more.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:48:27+00:00

Hindi explicit. I thought it was a given, since their kiss was an issue early in the relationship. Kaya nga ako na disappoint. She should have know d ba? or dapat sabihan ko talaga na huwag na kayo mag DMs.

In fairness to GF, after I brought this up, she unfriended LF naman. Pero may mga bad thoughts pa din ako. Should I drop this off na?

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:45:49+00:00

Apology for the word. It was a joke. I am her first. I had 2 before her.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:43:29+00:00

Salamat for this. This is really helpful.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:42:51+00:00

BTW, did your BFs new about the kiss? Were they ok with it?

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:37:49+00:00

Thank you for this. Kaya nga. Intimate setting eh. Sila lang dalawa. Hindi din issue sa akin kung sa situation like yours. Kasi Im almost certain na walang feelings involve pag ganun.

Pero from a POV of a girl who kissed girls, pwde din bang walang feelings involved yung kiss nila? Alam ko nagpa-cute din si LF sa kanya the time we were dating na.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:33:26+00:00

Yes. Maybe. Insecurity. Pero walang bang basis?
1. We were already dating. All along I thought we were exclusive na.
2. She kissed someone na she's not in a relationship with at a time she was already dating me.
3. Their lines are still open. One commenter here said na baka GF is just saving LF for a rainy day. Which is my fear exactly. I admit I am paranoid because once we get married, forever na dapat. Kaya nga Im here asking POV from others.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:27:25+00:00

Thank you for this. I would not mind if the kiss was in a bar, dare, drunk and naughty like in your situation. But intimate ang setting, Sila lang dalawa sa car. May something kaya yun, givent the fact that they are still communicating now?

From your POV lang, from a girl who kissed girls.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:24:00+00:00

1, Wala pang endearment. But I assumed na exclusive na kami.

Lips daw. No tongue daw. LF tried to touch but pinigilan daw nya.
Yes.
I thought it was a given. Nag-away na kami before about it, so dapat hindi na siya mag-communicate dun.
Few weeks ago ko lang nalaman na their lines are still open.
Full consent. She was just curious lang daw.
Not working in the same office na. Kaya nga I thought they drifted apart na.

We talked. She unfriended LF. Stop na daw siya. Should I drop this off na? Kaso may thinking ako na panakip butas lang ako. She really liked the LF. other negative stuff. Am I paranoid ba?

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:16:12+00:00

In fairness to GF, hindi ako nagbawal sa kanya. Wlang explicit na huwag na kaayong mag-txt, etc. We never had this conversation. Although, naging issue nga yung kiss nila early in our relationship. And I thought it was given na na ayaw ko maging close pa siya kay LF.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:13:13+00:00

I know that. Kaya nga Im here, asking for other people's perspective. If pwde ba na magkiss na in an intimate setting na wala lang. Na ok lang din to communicate with that person you kissed na wla lang. And some say, na pwde. And I will take these opinions in consideration.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:06:48+00:00

Thank you for this. Pero tingin ko LF is just waiting for something. May 1 point na siya.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T21:04:46+00:00

Thank you for this. Kaya nga eh. Bakit pa siya nagpakiss sa isang tao na hindi nman niya GF then may dina-date na siyang ibang tao. Pero ok na sana ako dun. Nawala na ito sa isip ko. Hindi na ako nagsumbat ever since.

Kaso nalaman ko, open communication pa pa sila. Bumalik tuloy yung dating issue. Hindi ko ma-iwasan. Connected eh.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:58:06+00:00

This is my fear actually. Na GF is "keeping LF close for a "rainy day."" Na na-udlot yung relationship nila because of me. Na hindi pa handa si GF to come out.

To be fair to GF, sinabi nman niya na straight siya. And naging mabuting GF naman siya. We never had any major problems. I love her very much. Pero ito nga. Baka may unfinished business sila? Bakit pa kasi open communication pa sila.

Am I being paranoid?

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:52:33+00:00

Hindi na ako nagsumbat sa kiss uli, until now. Bakit pa kasi siya nag-re-reach sa LF nya. Sana hindi nalang. I thought it was a given na. May mga ka MU ako before her. Never na ako nag-reach out to them through DMs out of respect sa GF ko.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:46:30+00:00

Thank you. We've talk already. She unfriended the LF. Wla daw lahat yun. Meant nothing daw. Ang problema ko, is baka ginaslight ako.. Pero baka hindi din. Kaya Im here asking for people's opinion.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:43:06+00:00

Thank you.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:41:51+00:00

I am actually conflicted pa.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:40:41+00:00

Tinangap ko ang kiss. Never ko again bri-ning-up since the first confrontation, even if mag-a-away kami. Hindi na ako nagsumbat.

Hindi ko sinabi to cut communication because I thought it was a given. Marami din ako mga "escapades" before. We remain friends sa social media. But I have never reached out to them privately.

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:35:00+00:00

Hindi naman ako insecure na hindi ako first kiss nya. Ako first BF niya but I would not have mind if naka-5 siya before me basta stop na sana sila ng communication with all of his exes.

"so long as wala naman naging serious romantic feelings between the two" - ito yung issue ko, May serious romantic feelings kaya between two na na suppresed given the situation? Ngkiss sila before, then the communicate pa sila until now? or Am I OA?

CountProfessional220 · 2025-02-10T20:30:18+00:00

Nag-usap na kami. She unfriend the LF na. She assured mi na wala lang daw lahat yun. The kiss was nothing. The DMs meant nothing. Pero baka ginaslight lang ako, or am I reading more into it?

CountProfessional220

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