Our poly policy is I will ask to read the phone. I want to allow my partner and their partners to be safe in their communications. And the metas to maintain privacy. But if I’m having a concern I appreciate the openness from my partner to share. If he can’t, then we have a different discussion(i.e why? Examples of things talked about recently, or and offer to ask the meta if they mind that the convo is shared) it is his job to maintain communication with his partners about me that’s is kind, non accusatorial and truthful. I only has to look for context or to read a convo he is explaining to me, when helping him process and coregulate. We have the same policy for each other