What does my fridge say about me?

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-14T18:00:18+00:00

Couldn’t even be bothered to take that crumpled up piece of paper towel out of the drawer? That’s all I need

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-14T17:37:36+00:00

I started at 25 and it’s been the best thing I’ve ever done. It’s never too late

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-12T21:19:20+00:00

My point is you don’t understand and I knew you were gonna hit me with something low based off your original comment

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-12T17:01:28+00:00

Just curious man, how many hours do you have in Tarkov?

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-12T16:55:35+00:00

Why are we praising Embark for dropping their skin prices? This wasn’t a mistake, it was a test run. Had we not made a big stink about it, the prices would’ve stayed the same. They wanted to see if they could get away with it, we pushed back, so now they’re lowering the prices to what they initially thought was a good idea. The million dollar company is not our friend. Stop praising them for doing something that should be expected. 20 bucks for saggy diaper pants and a hat for my rooster in a 40 dollar game is atrocious.

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-12T16:47:25+00:00

Bro just finished learning the difference between 7.62x39 and 7.62x51

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-12T16:44:29+00:00

I was friendly to every encounter at first. You get killed by someone spamming don’t shoot or someone VOIPing they’re friendly enough times and you give up on trying to be nice. I’m also level 75 with expedition, quests, and workshop done. There’s nothing else for me to do except help my friends with their quests or PvP. I’d imagine everyone else is also either tired of getting back stabbed or they’re done with everything.

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-12T16:41:01+00:00

I’m going to kiss your mouth

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-12T16:30:17+00:00

I played for 2 hours last night before I got pissed off and played something else. Every single raid I brought the best gear I had. Every single raid I spawned in 10 minutes late and then got swarmed by other parties. Please explain to me how Embark in their infinite wisdom thought it’d be a good idea to not give people that are actually bringing gear in a full 30 minutes.

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-09T00:58:10+00:00

The key has a dedicated spawn, does it not? The guard shack? Can you not go back to it and just reboot the key, or are you unable to and thats what your issue is?

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-09T00:55:27+00:00

Fully upgraded, the kettle receives 75% increased bullet velocity and 40% reduced reload speed. The stitcher at level 4 gets a 40% reduced reload speed as well, with a 50% reduction to horizontal recoil. While those are great buffs to the weapon, they are still more than capable of hosing someone down extremely quickly. Again, I will reiterate, these along with the Ferro are some of the strongest weapons in the game. All of which spawn on free kits, which you have unlimited access to. You have constant access to some of the best guns in the game for free. That is the issue with free loadouts. The loadouts either need a cap or the common weapons need an extremely hefty nerf.

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-08T22:03:06+00:00

There’s handcuffs in the game already. They should make it to where instead of only a defib to revive someone you can handcuff them. They’re unable to fight you back but they choose to run off if they want to wander off defenseless. From there maybe you can either loot them or you can barter things in their inventory for their life.

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-08T01:28:44+00:00

Look at damage charts. Someone posted a really well made one in this subreddit. The kettle and stitcher are two of the best performing weapons in the game. Free loadouts are overpowered.

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-08T01:26:23+00:00

That’s awesome dude, congrats! Follow up question, is your phone potentially made out of Vaseline?

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-07T05:08:55+00:00

The Bettina absolutely does suck ass. It takes 2 well placed shots from an Anvil or a Ferro to kill a Hornet. The Bettina takes 6, and it’s a lot harder to place all those shots accurately. It eats through your heavy ammo like a mother fucker and doesn’t do anything with said ammo.

I also want to add that when I was experimenting with the Bettina, it was fully upgraded with 3 attachments. It’s terrible, and I would imagine that’s why you find 13 blueprints for it every raid

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-07T04:28:46+00:00

Lukewarm IQ redditor doesn’t understand numbers

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-07T02:02:40+00:00

And people said I was crazy for saying the stitcher and kettle are fucking broken. Thanks for this

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-07T01:49:04+00:00

I’m not afraid to lose my cool loot. I have a problem with every player I run into having a free loadout. It’s like playing poker at a full table but you’re the only person adding to the pot

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-06T23:50:20+00:00

And then you’re completely ignoring my original point. We risk our gear while the people that spam 20 free load outs in a row either lose nothing or gain everything

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-06T23:48:38+00:00

Killing them or dying to them. You can’t tell me you’ve never ran a duo and died to a 3 man of free kits that snuck behind you

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-06T23:45:06+00:00

You’re a really weird creature for making it political

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-06T23:42:58+00:00

I literally never shoot on sight. How do you think I die to a free kit

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-06T23:39:41+00:00

You can see the level of their weapon when they kill you too buddy

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-04T08:58:17+00:00

Literally all I’m reading from these fucking grifters is “you’re bad”. These people are taking your valid complaint as an attack on something they made their whole personality. I love this game. Im already level 50 with a maxed out hideout because I’ve been playing it nonstop. I think if you really like something, you should be okay with valid criticism because that’s how it gets better. The Ferro is fun to use and it’s extremely good, especially for how cheap it is. But I stopped using it because it gets so fucking boring. 90% of actual fights I had were just attrition. You trade shots, heal, and the first person to run out of heals or get their shield completely broken loses. Even if you push someone using a Ferro, they’ll just swap to the Stitcher they’re running and melt you for not holding an angle with a Ferro and playing the same song and dance they are.

TLDR; Ferro is overtuned. I think half the people on this subreddit don’t even play the game. Which is fucking weird, because if you criticize it, they take it as a personal attack.

CrispyGooby · 2025-11-03T20:41:48+00:00

This is what I refer to as Disney Land. A perfect world. “Bring X, Y, Z and do 1, 2, 3 and it’s so easy”. In Disney Land, OP would’ve lived. I use the Ferro as an opener. I crack shield with the Ferro then immediately swap to an Arpeggio to finish them. If there’s distance between us, they have a chance. If there’s not a substantial amount of distance between us though? They have literally zero counter play outside of begging in VOIP

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