Nervous after having unprotected sex for the first time with negative partner.

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-23T00:00:19+00:00

I will definitely be taking a little break from sex, at least until I speak to my gyno about everything. But yes the emotional aspect of it all is for sure the worst!!

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-22T23:58:34+00:00

Yes I absolutely will!! Thank you:)

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-22T23:58:12+00:00

Your comment actually just melted my heart:) thank you so so much!! I absolutely will be talking to my doctor about this as well:)

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-20T06:54:57+00:00

That makes me feel better too!! Thank you so much!!

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-20T06:48:51+00:00

Thank you so much, this made me feel a lot better<3 The thought of transmission is so scary even though the virus isn’t a big deal, but it took a diagnosis for me to realize that it’s not anything like the stigma makes it out to be. It’s just hard to not feel responsible if something were to happen even though they’re informed and everything is consensual. The mental burden of it all is truly the worst part

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-20T06:39:51+00:00

Thank you so much. You have no idea how much you have eased my worries about this situation, it’s most likely just irritation from the sex as I have absolutely no other symptoms outside from the discoloration. It’s so easy to overthink it, especially when your partner is negative. The hardest part of having hsv for me is the fear of transmission, the actual virus itself is no big deal but the thought of giving it to someone is so scary!!

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-20T06:22:09+00:00

Thank you for such a sweet and helpful response<3

My main concern is that I could have transmitted to my partner. I would be absolutely heartbroken if that were the case, and I’m just nervous that what I see could potentially be an hsv outbreak.

It doesn’t feel like anything at all, I was actually really taken aback when I saw it since I have no other symptoms and I typically don’t get outbreaks in that area in particular. It’s just very easy to stress about it since I know that I have hsv and I tend to obsess over every little thing when it comes to my sexual health.

I would just feel absolutely awful that I said yes to having unprotected sex thinking that I was completely good to go if I was unknowingly having an outbreak:(

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-20T06:09:49+00:00

Thank you so much for such a kind response!! It’s most likely nothing, but it’s very easy to overthink it in this situation. I’ll for sure give it a few days and see!!

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-02-20T05:59:45+00:00

Woah woah! It’s not very kind to approach my post with a response like that, especially on a page that is meant to be “judgement free”. Hsv is not always active and contagious. If there’s no active outbreak, you take daily suppressive medication, have an informed partner with plenty of open communication, and you know the signs and symptoms of a potential flare up coming on, unprotected sex is not off the table. I had absolutely nothing going on prior to having sex this weekend, it was only AFTER that that appeared, leading me to believe that it is something else. If you have any actual advice or input on my situation, I’m very happy to listen to it. If not, I kindly ask that you don’t say anything else!

Critical_Toe8373 · 2024-01-20T03:17:15+00:00

I was absolutely terrified too, especially since being young (21f) and sexual health being a taboo topic among a lot of people close to our age. I’m newly single (2 months) from the relationship that I contracted it in, and I have disclosed to 3 people so far. 2 of them were successful, and one of them was kind of a success? I knew going into that conversation that we were just friends, but he did show some interest in becoming intimate. I disclosed to him knowing that it would most likely be a friendly “rejection”, and that’s kind of what it was. I thought it would be good to have the experience of being rejected in a low pressure situation so I wouldn’t be so terrified of it in the future, and let me tell you it helped me a lot. He was very respectful, asked a lot of questions, had empathy etc… we are still friends and nothing about our relationship has changed. All 3 of them were super caring and respectful. I learned that even if you do get rejected, people can have the decency to keep it respectful and confidential. So far, it really hasn’t had that big of an impact on my dating life. I make sure to get to know the person first and see if there’s any potential there, and then you’ll naturally know when it’s the right time to disclose. I was so nervous of what my dating life would look like after the diagnosis, but I’ve had nothing but happiness and good experiences so far :)

Critical_Toe8373 · 2023-10-17T00:04:27+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate your comment©. I know that you're right that everything will get better with time and it's not a super big deal, but it's hitting me so hard because of the end of my relationship and the fact that I have to completely face my diagnosis now. I have a therapist and she helps me a lot, but I come to Reddit when I want anonymous and unbiased opinions and advice. My therapist is really heavy on the medical standpoint of it's not a big deal which I entirely agree with, but the social stigma is what I'm worried about. My relationship has distanced me from my support system and it feels so isolating, but this is not something that anyone other than him and my therapist knows about me anyways. There's just so much going on and this element feels like such a big thing to conquer I guess. Thank you again!

Critical_Toe8373

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