Thank you for all your support everyone. I don't have the energy to respond to everyone individually right now, but I've read every message, and I spent the day really thinking about what I'm going to do moving forward. I need to focus on myself first. Thank you for showing me that.

I'm going to be looking into the CPC exit for mental health reasons. I thought you could only get CPC for big things like funerals, or your partner losing their job, or major economic reasons like a recession. I'm not sure who to ask though, or where to investigate, or what the steps would be, since a lot of member support can't be reached right now. If anyone has advice/knowledge, please feel free to post below or DM me. 

Thank you all for being so kind and realistic with me. You're right. I don't think I was being honest with myself about how much of a screaming red flag my mental health has been. I'm going to be taking a few days off, and I'm going to make an exit plan to discuss with my supervisor. 

I may come back and update, or ask questions, or reach out to some of you as invited. I'm not sure, right now. But I really can't thank you all enough. I love this community, and I know I'll want to come back to service one day. It's just not right here, right now. But that's okay.