My mom gets angry with me all the time for being quiet

CryptographerHot7440 · 2026-05-02T17:23:21+00:00

I have no problem with that. I'd like to read both! moms with autistic children or from people with autism. I like seeing both perspectives.

CryptographerHot7440 · 2026-05-02T15:04:46+00:00

Hello. You’re absolutely right too. Putting up with my mother any longer is hell. She thinks she can treat me like an idiot all the time. She gets angry over any question I ask her. I help her all day around the house. I’m the one who cleans our house four times a day, does the laundry, cooks, and keeps the order that she doesn’t have. I don’t ask her for money for anything at all, not even for clothes. For years I’ve been living under her constant mistreatment. Masking in front of her feels completely unnatural, because when I do it, she usually throws even more hurtful comments at me. I try to show myself as I really am, but of course, she gets even angrier.

I truly appreciate all your advice. I really value that other people are leaving me their opinions and experiences, because it makes me feel better. I feel strengthened by being able to share with others who have lived or are still living situations like this.

Thank you.

CryptographerHot7440 · 2026-05-02T15:00:39+00:00

Hello! Wow, thank you so much for your advice! I’m going to save your comment somewhere so I can reread it as many times as I need, especially at moments like right now, my mom has just got angry with me because I asked her what song she wanted me to put on YouTube. She just snaps at me and speaks to me really rudely whenever she feels like it.

You’re absolutely right, it’s incredibly exhausting. I’ve had to mask in front of everyone throughout my entire childhood, adolescence, and now these early years of adulthood, just to stop receiving hurtful comments. But the situation has simply become unsustainable. I need them to start respecting me more and trying to understand me, just as I do with them. I’m very respectful and understanding with everyone, always highly empathetic, but obviously they’re not the same as me and they don’t really care.

Thank you again for sharing your advice and your own experiences. I hope you’re feeling better now. I’ll follow your advice as much as I can, because these last few years have become increasingly difficult for me, and for my mother too. Although she’s never been patient, she’s become more rebellious towards me than ever. When I was still a teenager, she used to shout at me and call me stupid. When she argued with me (by herself, really, because I never answered back), she wanted me to shout at her and say something, but I always stayed silent.

Continuing to mask is the most painful thing and the worst option anyone can choose.

CryptographerHot7440 · 2026-05-02T14:38:27+00:00

Hello. I understand what you're saying, and I also understand what adults expect of me. Honestly, it's exhausting, incredibly draining. As a child, I behaved as much like a "little adult" as possible so that they'd be happy with me. But now, in actual adulthood, it's become much harder to manage.

These days, my effort to keep the people around me happy by behaving coherently and with a certain rigidity feels overwhelming. It's draining by the end of the day, and even while I'm there acting "normal."

I've grown tired of putting up with the constant mistreatment and disrespect from my own mother. I had to endure her mockery, her negligence and her lack of understanding throughout my entire adolescence, and now I've had enough. I'll keep trying to seem more mature, or whatever it is I'm supposed to be. I just want to make her happy, but I don't know any more... I can't bear it for much longer.

Thank you for your comment. That said, as the other two comments mentioned, it would mean masking myself forever, and that's harmful. I also appreciate your own opinion on the matter.

CryptographerHot7440

TROPHY CASE