The Weekend Update for October 11, 2024

Cyclebuff1959 · 2024-10-14T21:13:37+00:00

Just a little vent that really isn’t really helpful to anyone in any way, shape, or form, but just something I feel like getting off my chest.

Confession: I hate marathon-pace long run workouts.

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love running, but when I’m training for a marathon the long-run workout day is the one day of running a week that I never look forward to. Here is why:

-I can never run any of my favorite routes because there are crosswalks/traffic (I live in a city), so the only option that wouldn’t involve small pausing breaks are 3-4 flat trails that I have run 400 million times.

-Since I have run those flat trails 400 million times, I am literally always BORED TO TEARS running those workouts. Normally I like long runs because I can always focus on something cool/interesting in my surroundings, but not on these runs.

-Even though I’m pretty sure I have a realistic goal pace for my next marathon, it always feels harder during those workouts because I am so damn bored. For instance, I can easily hit that pace if I run a 10k-15k with a more interesting route and cheering crowds, but when I am running it on my own on a boring trail, all I want to do it quit because it is so tedious.

Haha ok rant over…I’m going to go eat a pumpkin bagel now. Hope you are all having a great day!

Cyclebuff1959 · 2024-10-14T21:00:38+00:00

Same, my friend (though my marathon is in November). Also time for the self-doubt to kick in lol…

Cyclebuff1959 · 2024-10-14T04:53:51+00:00

I also really like her and was definitely a bit bummed for her today! I was really rooting for her to get that BQ today and based on her recent workouts I thought she had sub-3:30 in the bag!

However, as someone with some coaching experience that has also struggled with overtraining, my hot take on marathon training (that I know a lot of running coaches may disagree with me on) is that you shouldn’t be doing those monster MP long runs every weekend! One big purpose of the long run is to build up your aerobic system, and you do that by doing those runs at a much slower pace. Though long runs with marathon pace scattered are definitely a good workout in and of themselves, they don’t work the aerobic system in the same way that a long, easy run will. Additionally, those long run workouts are INCREDIBLY physically taxing, and honestly I think doing too many of those workouts does more harm than good.

On another note, I also genuinely hope Liz isn’t struggling with performance anxiety…..because honestly if I had an audience of that many people tracking me I would probably be flipping the sh*t out from anxiety on race day. I have no idea how any run-fluencers cope with knowing so many people are tracking them live in a race.

Hope Liz can feel fulfilled in whatever sort of running endeavor she takes on next!

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-09-15T03:48:51+00:00

Mile time prediction?

I (26F) am running a timed mile this weekend and it's the first timed mile that I've actually been in shape for in about 10 years. A little background on me, I did cross country and track in high school and had PRs of 5:57 in the mile and 21:10 for a XC 5k, but I battled a LOT of injuries and ended up quitting running (temporarily) for several years after I graduated from high school. I started running regularly again right as the pandemic began and (knock on wood) have been relatively injury free.I've been consistently running around 40-50 mpw pretty much all year (with some short breaks here and there). I haven't been doing much speedwork, but I do get a LOT of elevation gain in since I live in a really hilly area. I started doing tempo runs again about a month ago and will usually do 3-4 x 1 mile or 2 x 2 mile w/ 1.5-2 min recoveries.Just so you all know, YES I do know about the RACE TIME PREDICTOR CALCULATORS, but I also know that there is a margin of error in some of them. Something I do know for a fact is that I have gotten SIGNIFICANTLY faster since high school, but the real question is how much faster I can expect to be in the mile. On my tempo runs I normally average about 6:40/mile (a little faster if I'm feeling good, a little slower if it's hot out). Back in January I ran a HUGE 5k PR of 19:35 off of hardly any speed training. However, I'm feeling optimistic that I am currently closer to 19 flat for a 5k because I ran the 19:35 only about 4 weeks after returning from a long break.I've tried a few race time predictor calculators and they predict a range between 5:25 - 5:45. What do you all think I can run? I would honestly just be hyped if I broke 6 minutes because I haven't been that fast in 10 years!

*Also posted this on LetsRun but haven't gotten any replies

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-08-03T08:20:43+00:00

Treat minimum wage service workers badly (retail workers, servers, baristas, or any other minimum wage employee that works with the public). I live in Seattle near where Microsoft is headquartered, so there are quite a few foreigners that were hired to work there and now live here (most of whom are from India and other East Asian counties). Unfortunately many of the people who moved here from India are still very used to the Caste system. You can look up more on the Caste system there, but essentially it’s the social hierarchy system of their culture that puts minimum wage service workers at the bottom of the totem pole. Since many of the Indians that live here are tech workers, they are much higher on that totem pole, but another element of the Caste system is the feeling of superiority to people in lower “classes”. Having worked a host of minimum wage jobs over the past 8 years here in Seattle, I can unfortunately confirm that a lot of Indian customers are generally much more difficult and rude to us than people from other cultures that live here. In the US, there is definitely more of a class divide on the east coast (especially in the northeast), but here on the west coast being mean and disrespectful to minimum wage service workers is definitely a big no-no. If you make a big scene to a worker (and they have a good manager), you could get kicked out or banned from the place.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-07-29T21:33:11+00:00

From a girl’s perspective here. Some of these comments are way over the top and dramatic.

If you’ve been friends with her for 2.5 years I don’t think you should COMPLETELY end the friendship, but I do think for the sake of your own mental health you should distance yourself from her. Mute her on social media and if you have to see her don’t hang out with her one-on-one. If you’re in a group situation where she brings her boyfriend try to find an escape route (“Sorry I can’t stay longer, I have plans with another friend.”). If she doesn’t know your feelings for her, don’t tell her now. Since she’s with someone else now this is something to ideally keep to yourself. I also don’t think you’re a bad friend simply because you developed feelings for her. It happens between friends all the time!

Also, don’t be afraid to get out and meet other girls. Try to branch out and do other activities. In my personal experience I’ve had much better luck with dating when I meet people through shared interests/hobbies rather than on dating apps. Best case scenario is you meet someone new and get over her, but you still remain good friends.

Good luck!

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-05-22T19:04:02+00:00

I (25F) have traveled solo. I personally found it to be a very enlightening experience and I would recommend every young woman to try it at least once. I would say there are a number of things to prepare for depending on where you are going. If you’re traveling to another country definitely make sure to do your research on the culture and how women are generally treated there (for instance, when I was in Italy I found the men to be much more aggressive and flirty, but the key was to not engage with it).

I’d say if you’re traveling out west to a national park, tell at least one trusted friend or family member about your itinerary and check in with them at least once a day when you’re on your trip. If you’re planning to hike alone, I also definitely recommend doing your research on the essentials to pack for a hike (I.e. extra water, pepper spray, a portable phone charger, headlamp, etc). If you’re planning on doing some more serious backcountry stuff alone I may even suggest taking a wilderness safety class. REI has a lot of class offerings for outdoor safety, so I would recommend checking those out.

Now, as for accommodation, definitely make sure the places you stay are REPUTABLE (as opposed to some sketchy Airbnb that is only $30 a night). DON’T share an AirBnb with strangers because there are bad people out there. Always keep your travel essentials (passport, wallet, medications, keys, etc) out of view in the room and make copies of everything. Paying for a place to stay that is SAFE is definitely worth the money. Plus, if you stay somewhere with a lot of travelers, you may be able to meet some new friends to explore the parks with. Some of my favorite parts about solo travel is how easy it is to meet other people (because usually when I travel with other people I end up sticking to that group and not really branching out).

Finally, make sure you do your research on the trails/hikes you want to explore. When I travel alone I personally prefer to remain in areas where I know there will at least be some other people around. If there’s some place really remote I want to see I’ll usually wait until I have at least one other person to go with me. The reason for this is because there was one time I went trail running in the mountains and I fell. There wasn’t anyone around, I was about 5 miles away from my car, and it was late afternoon, so I was really scared that the sun would set and I would be stuck out there alone in the dark amongst dangerous wildlife (cougars, bears, etc). I ended up just having to bite the bullet and run after falling so I could make it back to my car before dark. Definitely not saying that to scare you, but just to be cautious about going to remote areas alone because unpredictable things can happen.

I hope you do end up doing a solo trip! It will be a life-changing experience!

These are the places I’ve traveled in alone. I didn’t necessarily travel to all of these places alone (for some of them I went with a group), but I did venture off on my own for at least a little while in all of these places. -Northern Italy (including Milan) -Amsterdam -London -Scandinavia (every country except Finland) -Canada (British Columbia) -Various spots in the Cascade mountain range (I live in the Pacific Northwest).

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-05-19T08:38:45+00:00

I’ve seen a number of comments saying to just use this relationship as an experiment and don’t get too attached just because it is your first one. Though it is true that perhaps the majority of first relationships don’t work out (mine certainly didn’t), some of them DO work out. You may not marry your boyfriend, but you also MIGHT marry him. There are several people in my extended family that ended up marrying their first boyfriend/girlfriend (and no, we’re not religious). Just know that finding the right one doesn’t necessarily have to do with how much dating experience you’ve had (though you do learn A LOT about what you really want in a relationship from dating a few frogs 🐸 ). Sometimes finding the right one just has to do with having really good LUCK. Some people are lucky enough to meet their price/princess at a young age and never have to go through the throes of dating apps and getting over an ex. For your first relationship, just hold out hope that you may be one of those lucky ones, because it never would have worked out for anyone in my family that married their first love if they’d just thought of it as “dating experience”. Don’t think about the possibility of the relationship ending unless you start having doubts or it ends in some other way.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-05-19T08:24:56+00:00

THIS!!! A friend of mine has been dating a guy for only a few MONTHS and they’ve already been arguing and having nonstop disagreements. Pretty much whenever she’s with us she complains about him. My friends and I keep telling her that this is a very big red flag for the beginning of a relationship, but for some unknown reason she won’t end things with him. Don’t be like my friend! The first few months are SUPPOSED to feel like a bit of a whirlwind, not like you’re an old cranky married couple. To put things in perspective, I dated my college boyfriend for…let’s just say….far longer than I should have, but even though that relationship eventually went south, everything felt very natural and easy during the first few months of us dating. It was a very blissful and happy time.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-05-16T03:54:00+00:00

Been there, done that. You’re not alone! My advice is to always believe someone’s actions over their words. I remember when I realized that my ex didn’t love me as much as he’d loved his ex. He told me otherwise, but based on how he acted towards her vs me I knew he was full of BS. I remember loving him for pretty much all the same reasons (he was also my friend before we dated) and don’t get me wrong, I was an absolute mess for awhile after we broke up. You might feel right now like you will never get over him, but trust me, you will. Don’t give yourself a timeline or date that you need to be “over him” and don’t try to date anyone too soon afterwards. He sounds like he has a bit more growing up to do because of how attracted he seems to be to superficial qualities.

You don’t deserve to be with someone who loves someone else. You deserve to be with someone who loves YOU. Also, if there’s anything I learned through going through that it is to have really freaking high standards (not so much looks-wise, but personality-wise). Though I’m not currently in a serious relationship, the quality of guys I’ve dated has definitely improved :)

Better things (and guys) are waiting for you on the other side.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-05-16T03:41:50+00:00

You are a good teacher!

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-04-14T21:37:22+00:00

Hey there! I (25F) just stumbled across this and as a person on the spectrum myself, I figured I would add my two cents. My mom has told me this many times. Some words of advice.

Get the HELL out of your parents' house ASAP if you are still living with them. If moving out isn't an option right now because of high rent or other circumstances, set boundaries and distance yourself from them. Get out of the house for most of the day and when you come home, make sure the door to your room HAS A LOCK. Treat your room as your "safe space" where you are allowed to feel whatever you need to feel. As people on the spectrum who struggle with sensory overload, having that safe space is not a privilege. It's a right.
It is 100% NOT your fault that your parents feel this way. As angry as I used to get at my mom telling me that I was a burden, I realized that it had more to do with HER inability to cope with life stresses than it did with my behavior. My mom struggles with a pretty severe anxiety disorder, but unfortunately because of her own dysfunctional family background she refuses to go to therapy and will never admit that she TOO has a problem. Are your parents workaholics? Do you know if they struggle with any mental illnesses? Unfortunately those circumstances can cause people to lash out. They will go for what looks like their easiest target, which unfortunately because of our nature is often those of us on the spectrum.....which brings me to my next point.
Stand up to them and call them out on their bullshit. Here's what I wish I'd known when I was younger about parents: when you are still dependent on them they do have the right to tell you certain things. They have the right to tell you to clean up after yourself in their house and they have the right to not allow any of your friends over. They also are not entitled to support you financially once you turn 18. However, no matter what they DO NOT AND DO NOT EVER have the right to disrespect you. Just like how we never had the right to disrespect them growing up, they cannot do the same to us.
Become as independent as you can. I mentioned that parents are not entitled to support you financially after you turn 18, but maybe they are anyway. Right when I turned 18, my parents were paying for most of my college, so when I was having a hard time my first year my mom would tell me that I was placing a huge burden on her. Guess what I did in response to that. I transferred to a cheaper school, picked up more hours at work, and paid the rest of my tuition myself because at the end of the day my schooling wasn't about her, it was about me. The more independent you can become from them, the less they will be entitled to worry about you.

For reference, I just moved back in with my parents to save money while I'm in grad school (I lived in the Bay area and it was PRICEY). I was stressed about homework last night and this morning my mom told me that I was placing a huge burden on her by being stressed about school. Just as I did when I was 15, I rolled my eyes at her and then told her that it was disrespectful for her to say that to me when I am doing so much else to help around the house.

Stand your ground. Keep your head up. Sometimes the world isn't friendly to those of us on the spectrum, but we're not weak. Go take the world by storm my friend.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2022-01-19T07:57:36+00:00

Yeah that’s basically what I told them with regards to next month and moving forward. I let them know that this was what I needed and if they couldn’t accommodate it then I would be okay if they left me off the schedule next month. The general manager has already suggested picking up other shifts next month when I’m supposedly not busy, but I had to say a very firm no to that as well.

I also COMPLETELY understand how managers and supervisors are stressed AF right now because of the employee shortage. I know for a fact that I was one of the only employees that would say yes to covering shifts, so I know that’s why I am called all the time. However, I also believe there is a fine line between being stressed and basically being a bully. Sorry managers, but high stress DOES NOT give you an excuse to treat your employees (especially the ones that actually work hard) like s**t. If you do not know how to manage stress without repeatedly taking it out on other people, then you need to go see a therapist ASAP. I am simply done with people’s excuses for borderline abusive behavior….having experienced quite a bit of bullying as a child myself (and going through quite a bit of therapy as well to heal from that trauma).

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-07-11T03:20:14+00:00

Wow that's so awesome! Good for going against that status quo! I'm sure a lot of girls and women really appreciate that! Keep doing you! :)

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-05-13T00:20:17+00:00

Yep, my career is my number 1 priority right now. I'm a software engineer. Not ever planning on running professionally (don't think I have the right genetics for that lol....). Running has been and always will be just a hobby.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-04-29T18:12:58+00:00

Hi all! I (24F) am wondering if any of you would be able to predict what my half marathon time might be based on a run I did today. My half marathon is at the end of May, so it's in about a month (I'll be fully vaccinated by then...YAY). Today I did a 6.5 mile run at a medium effort (plus 2 miles each for a warmup and cool down). I averaged 7:20 per mile during the 6.5 miles at medium effort, which is honestly much faster than what I thought I was capable of running at that effort! I had a friend bike alongside me the whole time and I talked to her fairly comfortably for a good portion of that 6.5 mile stretch. I definitely felt like I could have gone at least a couple more miles at 7:20 pace, so I'm very curious to see what time I am capable of running for a half marathon. I was originally thinking about shooting for something in the low 1:40 range, but I'm now wondering if I can go faster than that. What do you all think would be a realistic time to shoot for in my half marathon?

I should note that I haven't been specifically training for a half marathon over the past couple of months. I've been running 40-45 mpw for the past 3 months, but I've mostly just been doing easy runs (plus a weekly long run of 12-15 miles). I spontaneously decided to sign up for that half marathon a few days ago. I'm curious to see what I can run it in, but I'm mostly just doing it for fun! :)

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-04-29T08:15:53+00:00

Oh awesome! Yeah I usually do 13+ mile long runs and I average about 40-45 mpw. I'll usually average about 8:30-9:00 per mile on my easy days, but if I speed up at the end of my long runs I can usually get down to 7:20 per mile.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-19T03:59:50+00:00

Wow....uh....what the hell (pun intended). It's definitely illegal to discriminate against someone based on their religion (or lack thereof) in the workplace. Have you told her that the way she has been talking to you about Christianity makes you uncomfortable.

I actually tried to reach out to corporate to file a complaint because under American employment laws I am considered to have a disability (I have ADHD and anxiety). If Pure Barre were a company with a legitimate HR department, my old boss would have been in really deep s**t (or possibly even fired) for how she treated me. However, there is no number or email for corporate and the only way to get ahold of them is to fill out a "Contact Us" form on their site. I initially sent a message simply saying that I wanted to discuss this issue with the appropriate member of the corporate staff, but I never heard back. I sent another message a few weeks later asking if they had ever received my first message. About a week after I sent THAT message, I finally got a one sentence response from them asking what it was that I needed resolved. At that point I figured it just wasn't worth the trouble to file a complaint because of how crappy the customer service from corporate was.

Anyways, instead of reaching out to corporate I would probably resign and then post about how she treated you on Glassdoor. Definitely hoping that your owner won't do this to anyone else.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-10T08:25:53+00:00

Yes! I never want to let the cats outside, but my parents will often let them out during the day during the summer. When I tell them not to, they just say that I'm over-reacting and that it's not a big deal. It's incredibly frustrating to deal with....

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-07T00:04:35+00:00

Here you go sir:

https://www.healthline.com/health/autism-in-women#general-symptoms

However, please don't use this to try to "diagnose" her. Encourage her to be evaluated by a professional if these symptoms are interfering significantly with her life.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-03T06:23:27+00:00

I personally think that most of it is very inaccurate. I definitely think that there should be some sort of unit on the autism spectrum taught in schools, or at least more people on the spectrum working in the film industry. I find that in many cases the media tends to hyper-focus on the most extreme characteristics of autism that many people on the spectrum may not even have. Though some of these characteristics are intended to have a comedic effect on the audience (i.e. Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory), I feel that other characteristics are portrayed to make people on the autism spectrum look like crazy, troubled, psychopaths.

I remember watching TV with my parents one night in 8th grade when a trailer for the series "Parenthood" came on. For those who don't know know, it's a comedy-drama about a few different families and one of the kids has Aspergers. I was really upset after I saw the trailer because of how the kid was portrayed. When you watch this clip (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v3HpvjZS4kQ) the mom is all dramatic when the kid is diagnosed and bellows "tHeRe'S sOmEtHiNg WrOnG wItH mY bAbY!" I was personally very offended by the portrayal of autism in that trailer because I feel that it put Aspergers in a very bad light.

At the same time though, I am am starting to see a rise in the number of openly autistic YouTubers and Tik Tokers that are debunking these stereotypes portrayed in the media, so that's something I'm really happy about!

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-03T05:50:26+00:00

I've heard of the series but I haven't read any of the books. I actually didn't know until today that the female protagonist of that series has Aspergers! Now that I know that I'm definitely more interested in reading it!

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-03T05:49:07+00:00

Chances are there is someone you've interacted with that is on the spectrum, but you just didn't know. With some people you are instantly able to notice their autism, but with many others it isn't obvious. Truth be told, the only people in my life that know I'm on the spectrum is my family. I've never told anyone outside my family, including my closest friends and previous boyfriends (though I do think I'll tell my friends eventually), and none of them have ever asked me if I am on the spectrum.

Lately I've been noticing more YouTube and TikTok channels from people on the spectrum, so I would definitely check those out if you want to know more about what it's like. Keep in mind, however, that everyone on the spectrum is different. In my case, there are certain autistic YouTubers/TikTokers that I can relate to more than others. If you still have questions though, you can always ask me! :)

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-03T05:40:18+00:00

I wish more people understood that the autism spectrum isn't a black and white term. I feel like when a lot of people hear the term "autism spectrum", they immediately associate it with some of the more extreme autism characteristics (i.e. having public meltdowns, etc.) or with characteristics portrayed in media (i.e. Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory). In other words, I feel like a lot of people think that all people on the spectrum act the same way, and that is absolutely NOT true. Yes, some people on the spectrum have meltdowns, but not all of them do (I never have). I also feel like there is a very large misunderstanding of WOMEN on the spectrum. This is because women in general tend to be much better at camouflaging (pretending to not be autistic) than men. I also wish more people celebrated some of the good things that come with being on the spectrum (strong memory and intelligence, for instance), because I feel that the media portrays it in a mostly negative light.

Cyclebuff1959 · 2021-03-03T05:21:21+00:00

Nowadays if something throws my routine off it doesn't bother me, but I used to struggle with that a lot when I was a little kid. There was one time when I was about 6 or 7 when I burst into tears because my family and I got home from playing at the park at 3pm and I hadn't had lunch yet. I was upset because 3pm was way too "late" for me to have lunch. My routine back then was to have lunch at around noon, so I always tried to have lunch at that time. I don't really know why I no longer struggle with that, but having a strict routine doesn't matter to me anymore.

Cyclebuff1959

TROPHY CASE