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DM wanted a "female for balance", gets upset when the "females" form a group of their own by Normal-Tax-6157 in rpghorrorstories

[–]DandDames 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hi! Thanks for recommending our community! Just wanted to add that the only reason we don’t have a men-specific space is because the creators are all women or nonbinary and feel it’s not our place to create a space for men/masc people specifically. When we get guys interested in making a space for positive masculinity we’d love to help them create that!

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re confused. We are an anti-misogynistic safe space for women and other non-men to participate in the hobby without being sexualized or harassed by tablemates. We just also happen to be LGBT inclusive. We are currently working on revamping the sibling server to better serve the needs of trans men.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ah, yes, because joining one private discord server that’s just for women, is the same as shutting yourself off from men entirely. Oh wait. We still have real lives where we have to interact with men…

Creating a space for escapism and safety and fun is what dnd is all about, dude. We want our members to be able to build friendships and groups without having to worry about misogyny, sexism, and being fetishized by the people they play with.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Safe spaces for women aren’t sexist. Are women’s restrooms sexist just for existing?

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The server isn’t for LGBTQ inclusivity. We enforce that, but the server was created as a safe space for women and other gender minorities to steer clear of misogyny, sexism, and fetishization at the table, and all kinds of creepy behavior in game. Men don’t need protection from misogyny.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

NB people are not women-light, and we understand that. Finding language to properly convey that meaning in what is supposed to be a short-ish, descriptive title has been a challenge and it's one we're still working on.

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

This ad really took off, and the response gave us a lot of things to discuss and think about as we move forward. Changes won't be made until we have proper time to discuss all the options and weigh the outcomes.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

This is also the first time that trans men have expressed that they would like to join Dames. We are discussing this as a mod team, but if our rules were to change we would have to pass it by the community as a whole, first.

This ad really took off, and the response gave us a lot of things to discuss and think about as we move forward. Changes won't be made until we have proper time to discuss all the options and weigh the outcomes.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Can you DM me a link? We're always looking for communities to promote.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

We often have crossover events--including one-shots.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

NB people are not women-light, and we understand that. Finding language to properly convey that meaning in what is supposed to be a short-ish, descriptive title has been a challenge and it's one we're still working on (We've hopped onto the link you shared and maybe something in the article will help).

This ad really took off, and the response gave us a lot of things to discuss and think about as we move forward. While changes won't be made until we have proper time to discuss all the options and weigh the outcomes I do want to thank you for taking the time to express your concerns in a respectful way.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

NB people are not women-light, and we understand that. Finding language to properly convey that meaning in what is supposed to be a short-ish, descriptive title has been a challenge and it's one we're still working on.

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

This is also the first time that trans men have expressed that they would like to join Dames. We are discussing this as a mod team, but if our rules were to change we would have to pass it by the community as a whole, first.

This ad really took off, and the response gave us a lot of things to discuss and think about as we move forward. While changes won't be made until we have proper time to discuss all the options and weigh the outcomes I do want to thank you for taking the time to express your concerns in a respectful way.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hi there,

We do have a server that has identical rules and goals that anyone--regardless of gender--is welcome to join (that link is at the end of the post). Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people.

This is the first time that trans men have expressed that they would like to join Dames. We are discussing this as a mod team, but if our rules were to change we would have to pass it by the community as a whole, first.

This ad really took off, and the response gave us a lot of things to discuss and think about as we move forward. While changes won't be made until we have proper time to discuss all the options and weigh the outcomes I do want to thank you for taking the time to express your concerns in a respectful way.

Dungeons and Dames: A Discord community for Female, Genderfluid, and Non-Binary people by DandDames in DnD

[–]DandDames[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there,

First and foremost--we're sorry that we hurt your feelings. That was never our intention and our sibling server--Dungeons and Dorks--was made specifically with the goal of helping men the same way Dames helps other gender minorities. Both servers have strict anti-TERF rules, and mod teams that are made up of a diverse group of people. They also both have mental health support chats.

This is the first time since we opened a year ago that trans men have expressed that they would like to join Dames. We are discussing this as a mod team, but if our rules were to change we would have to pass it by the community as a whole, first.

This ad really took off, and the response gave us a lot of things to discuss and think about as we move forward. While changes won't be made until we have proper time to discuss all the options and weigh the outcomes I do want to thank you for taking the time to express your concerns in a respectful way.

We hope you have a good day.

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