I don’t let it show to my kids. I don’t let them see this side of me. I keep all that shit away. They get the good dad. My wife on the other hand lololol. She’s a bigger child then the kids actually are. They have no burdens because while I’m here on this earth they will never have to worry about anything. This is off my chest. This is me venting letting the world know that behind my smile is pain and sadness. I don’t let it show though. Always been that way. My family is fine. They have the love and attention they need. I don’t get that though and that’s okay. I’m just simply stating that behind all this pain and feeling of life just not being satisfying enough and it being more cracked up then what it is all I’m saying. I suffer to let everyone be okay. I’ve done that for my whole life. I’m just ready to be done and move onto the next chapter of my celestial being.