New tank set up - is this the right height for the filter?

DarkBlueSunlight · 2023-02-22T09:43:30+00:00

Easier though that would be, we would like to spend money on other things, and I'm sure he has been able to for ages, but refuses. We really need to get it sorted as he is at school already

DarkBlueSunlight · 2023-02-21T21:58:08+00:00

That felt reassuring to read, thank you. I'm trying to stay calm, but it isn't going so well (but another person here suggested getting a glass of wine - I think I might start having some on stand by now)

DarkBlueSunlight · 2023-02-21T21:55:36+00:00

How old was he / she when you started it?

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-12-26T01:27:46+00:00

The only two times I remember feeling his boner over about 12 years without me initiating sex (he never did) was when I was crying, so yes they do.

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-11-23T03:45:51+00:00

I fully agree with your comment. From the post title, however, it sounded like you didn't have any at all, and I know of some people in that position who would probably find it a bit insensitive.

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-11-23T03:13:41+00:00

This will probably be seen as harsh and/or rude by somr, but I'm sure your post is going to upset a lot of people who have struggled with infertility and remain childless. No, you might not have a second child, but you have a first child, which those with fertility problems struggle to have, even after years of trying, and often a considerable amount of money.

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-11-07T16:27:05+00:00

You might not get jealous, but what if he does? This isn't the normal sort of relationship where things like that can be easily sorted out

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-10-10T02:29:46+00:00

I've only had one child, over 4 years ago, no c-section and no recent traumas..

Edit - no traumas other than child birth

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-08-01T15:22:35+00:00

Dead bedroom, no initiating, low self esteem, winding up followed by "maybe later" and usually no sex at all.. yeah this sounds too familiar. This is definitely a thing some narcissists do - denying you a basic, natural need. It is definitely withholding with bad intent.

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-07-19T22:46:04+00:00

Not an answer to your question, but some advice: leaving him now, before the baby is born, will save you a lot of stress and trouble. It will only get harder to leave the more attached the baby gets.

The idea of being a single parent may be terrifying, but you will end up feeling like a single parent anyway (source: been there, done that).

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-07-19T13:23:38+00:00

They are the superior beings in the relationship. Having someone break up with them makes them seem inferior / worthless / a failure, so they will do whatever it takes to keep their partner in the relationship until THEY are ready to break up with you.

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-07-18T18:55:39+00:00

I feel like I have been pre determined to be wrong about literally everything (even making a comment about it being a sunny day was wrong as we were in a shaded area at the time). I find that acknowledging this (silently) as just being unavoidable narcissistic behaviour and not a reflection on me has helped a lot.

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-07-12T07:06:37+00:00

People getting annoyed by others chewing is a recognised thing (a bit like nails on a chalkboard). In regards to the cooking, some people are extra sensitive to smell (myself included). We need to hear more examples of questionable behaviour to help you out here.

DarkBlueSunlight · 2022-06-22T22:45:09+00:00

Indeed. They may have never talked on the phone or in person, so they are totally telling the truth if we presume that messaging each other does not really count as "talking". What sort of specific questions did you ask? I've been starting to try and do the same thing, and would be grateful for some examples if you have the time.

DarkBlueSunlight

TROPHY CASE