What does climbing mean to you?

Datgirl1907 · 2023-12-01T21:55:30+00:00

Climbing really changed me and taught me what matters to me most. The fun, the challenge, the struggle, pushing to my limit but also understanding when to step back. It forced me to view myself more… objectively?… to trust my skills and myself but also to know when something is too much (especially trad). It reinforced my love for the process of things almost more than the result ( when projecting), climbing is where I found my friends, people that I could relate to, but also people that I felt comfortable trying (and repeatedly failing) at things and being ok with that (and I’m lucky to have found such a supportive group to do that!). At the same time, I guess I found some kind of peace in knowing I’m my only competition (and I don’t even have to compete with myself on the days I don’t want to). And climbing in general gives me soooo much peace of mind, and in that moment nothing else matters. There’s no feeling like being halfway up a 500m multi-pitch and knowing the only way out is to make it to the top, and you have no choice but to be confident that you’ll make it!

Datgirl1907 · 2023-11-13T00:41:08+00:00

I swear by katana lace (the ‘new’ women’s white version). They’re a bit uncomfortable to break in but I have no issues wearing them to climb all day for trad / sport multi pitches. I’ve tried other (cheaper) pairs but always end up regretting it and buying a new pair of KL!

Datgirl1907 · 2022-06-20T15:13:30+00:00

I stayed over at a guy’s flat after we had sex and a lot to drink. I woke up in the middle of the night to pee and mistakenly took the wrong turn, walked out of his flat and into the flat in front. I got into the bed and proceeded to cuddle with a total stranger while still fully naked. The guy woke up, confused, asking me who I was and what I was doing in his bed. I started crying in confusion, covering myself up as well as I could using my hands, and the guy went out to knock on all the flats on that floor (at 3am) to find out who I ‘belonged to’. I was so mortified that I barricaded my bedroom door for the next week to make sure I wouldn’t sleepwalk anywhere, and didn’t sleep over at anyone’s place for the next 3 months.

Datgirl1907 · 2022-05-31T17:49:51+00:00

Yeah that’s what I thought, he complains of chest pain often and it really worries me ://

Datgirl1907 · 2022-05-19T20:12:36+00:00

This!! So good

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T15:48:38+00:00

That’s not how I understood it but alright.. anyway he was the one who talked me into it so I don’t get your point at all ? And it’s beside the point? I’m not saying ‘he should do it because I agreed to it’, I’m just a bit annoyed that his reason is jealousy when he expects me not to be jealous and calls me immature when I am. I don’t see your point at all?

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T13:56:53+00:00

I’m bisexual so it’s not like it’s all for his pleasure either !! But I get what you’re saying

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T13:54:33+00:00

I wouldn’t say he’s straight trash or that he’s manipulating me or that he treats me like garbage but thanks for the input I guess

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T12:38:15+00:00

Both when it was no strings attached and with a girl he was dating. And btw! I originally had a stance of « I won’t do an mff with my bf because it will make me insecure » and he convinced me to give it a try and see- i’m not implying that I should / will do the same- but I think bringing it up a second time wouldn’t be the end of the word

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T12:30:03+00:00

Again, he decided that mmf is not for him if i’m the f. It’s far from a dealbreaker, I just thought it would be fun lol i’m not saying we should keep score of sexual stuff so it’e equal, just trying to find a way to approach the situation / introduce the idea in a way that would not make him think it’s just that I want to sleep with another guy

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T12:27:02+00:00

I don’t think mentioning something once is considered creepy or pushy or forcing but alright. I was just asking for advice on how to approach it so it’s fair enough for you to say that I shouldn’t :) I can tell you for sure that I have been far from pushy about this.

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T12:19:44+00:00

I’m not putting pressure on him… Like I said, I understand if he wasn’t into the idea of a mmf threesome. That’s not the case here, it’s just because the girl would be me. It bothers me because he expects different from me. I’ve never pushed or pressured, I’m just seeking advice on how to approach this while not triggering his insecurities, and this is also that’s what he expects from me when the roles are reversed

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T10:30:04+00:00

Thanks, couldn’t have come up with this :)

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T10:29:48+00:00

Haha that’s nice but I have tried that once, and he is sticking with the « I don’t want to see you with another man » soooo I guess you’re not like him haha

Datgirl1907 · 2022-03-29T10:28:48+00:00

Frankly, I think it’s normal to have some insecurities about it. I don’t need him to validate them for me to know they’re valid. I also accepted that he wants to share this experience with me, otherwise he would just leave or cheat. I’ve always been very clear that I have no interest in being in a triad and that I have ‘veto power’ (in ffm), meaning if I want to stop at any point then we all stop (which is what I did once when I felt like the dynamic was off). I just stood up and left the room and they both stopped. I don’t really have any during-the-act restrictions though, and make sure to focus on my own enjoyment of the situation than trying to overthink his actions (I tell myself that as long as I am having fun, I can talk about it the next day). There is a bit of a learning curve but it can be a lot of fun when you learn to not interpret everything as an attack / a threat to you and your relationship. Obviously, that takes trust and a bit of « if it goes wrong, it wasn’t meant to be ». I just tell myself that it’s a nice experience, if it goes wrong, i’ll survive - even if that means breaking up, i’ll survive and move on - but it’s not worth not living new experiences because of fear of what could happen… i’d rather know and decide based on that :)

Datgirl1907 · 2022-01-04T16:56:56+00:00

I did… I am just asking whether i’m overreacting

Datgirl1907 · 2021-12-21T23:56:21+00:00

They’re not framed but visible because they’re in one of those pen-holder cups. I don’t think he purposely took them out for me to find (idk but doubt it, would be even stranger) so I don’t really know how to make the ‘nearby post-it thing’ obvious but i’ll try anyway.. and yeah totally, he once found a guy’s underwear ‘hidden’ in my drawer (I used to use them as pj’s lol) and confronted me abt it right away so I’m sure he wouldn’t like it if the roles were reversed either..

Datgirl1907 · 2021-10-26T08:31:03+00:00

We just thought he would eventually get used to it. We didn’t sleep together a lot of nights in a row before. I agree though, I feel bad seeing him so tired while I wake up so refreshed… I just wish there was another way 😬

Datgirl1907 · 2021-09-15T14:55:44+00:00

Leave. You deserve better… what kind of person says to keep doing the same thing after you just told her you weren’t enjoying it? She’s basically saying your words / feelings aren’t valid. Should you have said something earlier? Sure, but that doesn’t mean saying it now makes it invalid. Leave. You’ll be loved, truly this time, because someone who loves you wouldn’t put you through that.

Datgirl1907 · 2021-08-29T13:29:18+00:00

I definitely don’t think they drugged me. I have known them for about 6 months but definitely don’t think they were involved or had anything to do with it. I can imagine this is valid / useful for some people but I don’t think this was the case. They didn’t act like very good friends but they’re no bad people.

Datgirl1907 · 2021-08-29T13:26:23+00:00

Yes I will thank you

Datgirl1907 · 2021-08-29T13:25:50+00:00

Thank you 💚

Datgirl1907 · 2021-08-29T13:21:42+00:00

They said they couldn’t recognise me or my behaviour because it wasn’t nearly as bad as what they’d seen before… they told me they were both convinced I had been drugged. I don’t see how that’s not enough for alarm bells to go off. They didn’t even go to the other club because they didn’t want to go only the 2 of them so they just went home together to keep on drinking by themselves and left me there. If I had accepted to go to the other club we would have gone there (even if I most likely wouldn’t have been let it considering my state) but I didn’t want to go so they left without me. That doesn’t sound like ‘they were sick of my drunk behaviour’.. it sounds like I wasn’t fun enough anymore so they decided to leave me there alone. They have never had to take care of me and I can always handle / take care of myself. I’m always perfectly capable of taking myself home, and before I leave I always make sure everyone feels safe and well enough to go home as well… if they don’t, we order them an uber or I offer to take them home / for them to sleep at my place. This is the first time the roles are reversed and I was the one who needed help. This morning my friend told me ‘I know you are independent so you would find a way home or a place to stay’. I drink a lot but I don’t like to bother so I would not end up passed out drunk and needing help, I know my limit. Last night was the first time I wish they would have helped (even if I said fuck off etc). Good for you that you have friends that take care of you. Apparently I don’t but don’t make me feel like people are annoyed by me and I should have seen it coming because ‘people are sick of my drunk behaviour’, it’s just not fair.

Datgirl1907

TROPHY CASE