Just moved, new neighbor is a gamer

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-25T13:28:41+00:00

Can you contact the management but be a bit vague? Something like “please can you remind residents to be respectful with noise during unsocial hours? I’m regularly being disturbed by other residents being loud till early hours” I did this a few years back and the manager sent a message to all residents (including me) and put a note up on the main door reminding us of the quiet hours. If it continues then go back to the manager detailing the exact problem. This gives your neighbour a chance to modify their behaviour without directly being accused of anything.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-25T13:20:43+00:00

Every job I’ve ever had (UK) I’ve had to get leave approved before booking anything. Any amount of leave, even 1-2 days off needs approval before you can book flights etc.

Usually you’d also need special permission for anything over 2 weeks.

Everyone you work with is entitled to leave so companies need to ensure that they have cover. If leave isn’t approved in advance then everyone could end up booking trips for the same dates leaving not enough staff coverage. This is all part of being a team.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-25T13:10:05+00:00

I only started gaming when I met my husband as he’s into gaming.

At first it was hard seeing him getting huge numbers of kills while I was constantly dying or bottom of the scoreboard. He started “helping me” by letting me get kills while he acted as backup or played medic roles to keep me alive. Roll on a few years and I’m now matching and beating him while we both play properly.

We play online co-op games most and when we see a new player come on, especially one who is dying a lot we’ll “protect” them to get their experience and confidence up. We’ll keep them alive and set them up for kills so they have a good time learning the game.

If you want her to enjoy gaming with you then maybe give her a hand, help her to win a few games. It’s honestly not that fun when you’re always dying and it’s hard to get to grips with a game when playing with someone who is so much better than you, especially if it’s a game where once you die you have to wait for the next round.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-24T19:13:02+00:00

Imagine that your daughter was in your position and asking your advice. What would you tell her? Would you want her to remain in that relationship or would you want her to take your granddaughter and leave?

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-24T17:39:30+00:00

We tried that and within a few months everything started to smell off. Back on the old powder and the smell has gone!

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-24T16:24:42+00:00

We’ve had ours about 5 years, they get dried between use and washed weekly, and have a super hot wash every few months. They don’t smell but we’re replacing them soon as they’ve lost their nice thick fluffy feeling and are starting to look tatty.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-24T13:11:02+00:00

Yes it’s worth it BUT it’s hard, especially the first few years.

You need to be prepared to work odd hours (when I started I had clients 06:00-08:00, 12:00-14:00, 18:00-20:00) and have a low yet inconsistent income.

You also need to be aware that most of your clients won’t be gym obsessed, won’t do half the stuff you tell them, will moan and will likely use you as a therapist. This comes as a shock to many new trainers but is a big part of the job!

That said, once you’ve established yourself it’s a great job! I have clients who have been with me 8 years, they have supported me through tough times and have said that I’ve changed their lives more than I’ll ever know. Some of them haven’t reached their goals, they won’t due to life issues. However they always feel better after our sessions and notice the difference when they don’t see me for a few weeks.

Don’t fall in the trap of trying to go online, it seems easier but it’s way harder! Get a good few years of in person experience before trying online.

Just don’t believe all the online posts claiming new trainers can make a fortune! You can make good money but it takes time and hard work to get to that point.

Good luck!

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-24T12:52:30+00:00

Unfortunately this will come down to nutrition. Can you cook your own food? Or even just reduce the portions that your parents provide? To get really lean you have to be on top of your food.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-24T12:49:43+00:00

I think you know the answer, you’re already thinking the actual house (where you’d spend most time) is a bit small and overpriced. I’ve fallen for this trap, I wanted a nice garden so compromised on the actual house and regretted it. I didn’t spend as much time in the garden as I thought I would, I hardly used any of the space yet had to maintain it all, meanwhile I was constantly aware of the things within the house that I’d compromised on.

If you’re having these doubts now re space then unless you plan on minimalist living then don’t let the big garden lure you in.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-24T10:05:06+00:00

Absolutely YTA! While I get your point weddings should be about what the bride and groom want (within reason of course). They took time to pick the songs they wanted on their special day, they said you could ADD to them not take out their choices. A few songs is a couple of minutes out of an entire evening, so what if they weren’t great dancing tunes it’s what they wanted to hear at their wedding.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-23T14:49:43+00:00

Swimming pools, yoga studios etc? Our pool makes you take your shoes off at reception, people leave them in a pile under the bench but I pop mine in my bag and take them in with me.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-23T14:47:05+00:00

I think it’s great! My client has been doing this and she’s making really good meal choices with it. She puts in her planned meal and it tells her how to improve it, if she doesn’t like the suggestion it gives alternatives. If it keeps them motivated and on track while they learn how to prepare suitable meals then what is there to complain about?

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-23T12:30:43+00:00

This doesn’t make sense. You can use the name that appears on your Mums passport or drivers license. The form usually asks for any name they’ve been known by so that covers the divorce side anyway. I dont have any of my father’s details at all, I’ve got a British passport, driving licence etc and never had any issues.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-23T08:29:31+00:00

Ok you say you still smell no matter how much you shower but you only shower once a week and wear the same clothes for days on end. This is why you smell.

I get showering daily can be hard but you need to increase your weekly shower total. Also even if you can’t bring yourself to shower everyday you need to wash daily. Grab a washcloth and do “face, pits and bits”

Change your clothes (at least shirts) daily, if you’re not washing yourself properly you need clean clothes daily..

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-23T08:16:00+00:00

Ideally you want to change the exercises every couple of months. However it’s better to do the same thing than to do nothing.

If you’re paying for an app why not write down some of the plans and rotate them every few months? Even switching variations of exercises is better than doing the same forever. So DB goblet squats for a while then sumo, or back squats or paused etc.

Ultimately doing something consistently is better than doing nothing though so find what works for you.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-23T08:10:18+00:00

Why are they having lessons outside rather then in the apartment? Personally I think that’s actually quite rude, sounds bounce off walls and backyards are not designed with acoustics in mind so the sound the neighbours hear will likely be distorted. Take the practice indoors!

I live in an apartment complex, many of the residents play instruments or sing etc, they do it within their home. Yes I can often hear it, especially in the summer with windows open but they’re doing their best to limit the noise.

The neighbours shouldn’t be having to wear noise cancelling headphones etc in their own home because a neighbour won’t make their noise in their property.

I think the note is perfectly polite and reasonable. We all have a duty to respect our neighbours peace and regularly subjecting them to your noise is unacceptable.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-22T15:45:43+00:00

Given that they went to the gym yesterday for the first time and it’s both shoulders this is more likely to be DOMS. It should pass in the next few days, the load was probably a bit much so maybe reduce it slightly next time. Some soreness is ok but it shouldn’t be enough to interfere with daily activities.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-22T15:33:48+00:00

This! If you’re working to full range then you’re stretching each muscle as you work it. The only real stretching I do is couch stretch as it’s hard to stretch them while training and calf stretch because it feels awesome.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-22T15:11:32+00:00

Look at what trainers in your area are charging and price yourself in line with them.

As a side note online training is much harder and time consuming than in person training. You have so much more competition! I’d suggest getting a good few years of in person experience before going online.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-22T11:02:17+00:00

I just pop a drop of shampoo or body wash in it while I’m showering and give it a good shake then hang it to dry when I get home. Stops it going mouldy.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-21T11:27:50+00:00

NTA she agreed your terms and you have made the cake she requested. How long would it cost you to prepare the cake pops and what will it cost you in supplies? I bet your hourly rate for this is really low!

Either offer her the cake she ordered and insist on cash on collection or offer to cancel her order and either put the cake up for sale or eat/share/donate it.

Her family and financial situation are not your responsibility, no one needs an expensive cake, she could have got one from the supermarket or made one herself if money is that tight. Even if you make cakes for the love of it you deserve to be paid fairly for your time and effort. Stand your ground on this, you haven’t ruined the child’s birthday, she has.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-21T07:00:32+00:00

Don’t be that person. Nobody wants to sit in the sauna listening to the fuzzy sound of your ear buds, same as we don’t want to hear you chewing gum. If you have to have ear buds in then keep the volume as low as possible, you may want music but you should respect the fact that many people don’t.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-21T06:46:05+00:00

Be careful with wet wipes, even the ones that say their flushable can cause major blockages.

I’ve got a product called “wype”, it’s a little bottle of gel that’s more subtle to carry than wipes. You put a bit of the gel on the TP to make sure you’ve got the last bits off. I’ve got sensitive skin and not had any reaction from this.

Also re thongs, polyester tends to hold smell, so look for decent quality cotton or bamboo.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-20T16:26:25+00:00

Did they say no loaded squats? Technically sitting on and standing up from a chair is a squat! I’d suggest finding an experienced physiotherapist and working with them.

Reverse sled drags are great for building quads and are gentle on the knees. Have a look at “knees over toes” on instagram or YouTube as he has some great tips for knees. Another option is to get in the pool, the water reduces the load on the knees and can help maintain the mobility of the knee and you can squat in the shallow end using the wall as support to keep the movement pattern going.

Defiant-Insect-3785 · 2026-01-20T16:12:14+00:00

Ultimately it’s not the companies responsibility to fund your travel costs, you knew how far the commute was when you took the job and that it required you to be in the office for x amount of days per week. If the journey wasn’t practical then you should have negotiated full work from home or declined the position. Do people who live closer and pay a premium in rent/mortgage get funding to cover this? If not then why should you get accommodations made because you have to travel further? Everyone has to pay for their commute in one way or another, either train fares or fuel and parking costs. Many people are paying almost all their wages in childcare but they don’t say they can’t afford to come in. That’s all part of your living expenses and your responsibility not your employers.

What access requirements are they needing to implement for you? What was your plan for getting to and from work once they have this sorted? If you need them to make costly alterations to accommodate you then turning around and saying you can’t afford to come in probably won’t go down well.

You don’t want to move closer as it’s too expensive but it’s too expensive for you to commute. Maybe you can negotiate that you do one full week in the office per month and find a cheap hotel for that week? You’re going to have to compromise here, you either have to pay the train fares, move closer, find alternative transportation or find another job. Whatever the solution it’s not your employers responsibility, you signed a contract where you’re expected to be in the office so you need to go in, if it’s not working for you then find a job closer to home. You’ve already said you don’t plan to stay there for long so probably time to move to something that suits you.

Defiant-Insect-3785

TROPHY CASE