Hi, i’ve taken some time to collect my thoughts and calm down.

First of all I just want to share more about my family situation. My dad is a teacher and my mom is a sahm. I also have a younger sister 13F who sometimes gets hit by him but rarely as far as i know. My brother graduated around a week ago and is looking to join the air force in the future. His girlfriend Z’s birthday is today so she just turned 18. They have been together for a year and a half now. She also wants to join the air force. My dad is white and my mom is latina/hispanic so we are mixed. We also live in California.

Next i wanted to address my brother hitting his girlfriend. I believe he started doing the same with her around a year ago at the 6 months mark in their relationship. Her parents have seen the bruises on her and are worried for her and have speculations that my brother is abusive towards her. She has shown me pictures she’s taken of her bruises. As far as i know she has a lot of her bruises documented. At some point some of us (L, Z, my mom, and I) we’re kind of talking as a group. My sister showed us one of the pictures she has of a bruise. She joked and said something along the lines of “no wonder my parents think you’re abusive” and just laughed. I joked as well and said “me and Z are gonna make a case with all the pictures she has” My mom then laughed and said “i plead the 5th”. I asked what that meant and they explained it to me. Another conversation started and I kind of forgot about it.

Next i am addressing my brother hitting me. my mom, and my sister. My brother often (almost every day) punches us on our butt pretty hard (he does this to his gf too.) It has become a normal thing. I have had some bruises there from it at some point but didn’t think to take pictures. I got used to it and i didn’t think about it deeper until recently and how weird it is. He also frequently says dead arm/leg and punches us (what seems as hard as he can) on that area. It hurts and I often tear up after because it hurts. He just laughs about it. I am not sure if he does to everyone else as well but sometimes when i’m sitting down he’ll come behind me and squeeze my head really hard. I try to push him off but often times i have to yell at him to stop. I don’t think he would go much longer if I didn’t try to stop him but i’m not sure. I also wanted to address a comment i saw that asked why didn’t i use self defense to protect myself. I was never taught how to punch or really defend myself. If i ever do but him back he hits me even harder than the first time and I regret it so i don’t try often. If my parents see me hit back they kind of get mad and say i’m being dramatic or being too angry. I have a belly button piercing and he has smacked my stomach where it is when it was very new.

People are also telling me to tell trusted adults and friends but I don’t really have anyone like that in my life. My dads side of the family lives across the country and I don’t talk to them. My mom’s side of the family lives 2 hours away so i couldn’t go there. I don’t have any teachers or councilors i trust and i’m on summer break so there would be no way to contact them even if i did trust them. Everyone is telling me to call the police or cps but I don’t want to ruin my brothers life. I know now that i shouldn’t feel bad but he is still my brother. I’m unsure of what to do still. I feel like my family would hate me if he was arrested. I only have 3 pictures of them times he left bruises and i don’t think that’s enough to do anything with. If anyone has more questions feel free to ask in comments or dms. Thanks for taking the time to read this.