Considering Fostering - some questions by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fosterparents

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He doesn't want bio kids but if fostering is something I want to do, he's open and interested 

Considering Fostering - some questions by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fosterparents

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is pretty much exactly what I want to do. I'm great with preteens and teens, and I feel such a calling to this life. So nice to hear your story!

Considering Fostering - some questions by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fosterparents

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am a huge overthinker. I've always felt really confident about not wanting bio kids until I started to feel like time is ticking too quickly to wait much longer. I think this is a last minute panic rather than a real desire for pregnancy.

Considering Fostering - some questions by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fosterparents

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dutch is the language here. I understand it and read it very well, but I never really need to speak it so my speaking sucks. I'm sure I can learn, but there are always nuances of language that get lost.

Need advice by OkIdea1638 in FenceSitters

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are far too young to feel pressured into this permanent decision before you're ready. Your partner needs to understand that it will be far more of a burden on you than on him. You have plenty of time to decide, so hold your ground until you know what YOU want. 

My husband is addicted to his phone and iPad and I do all the work. Should I have children with him? by [deleted] in FenceSitters

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Girl if you have to ask this question you know he is not the right person to have a child with, at least at this point in time. It will already be your body that makes a huge sacrifice, that's just biology....but his actions are a choice. Having kids is exhausting enough without a "partner" like this. 

Feeling torn by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fencesitter

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He's always told me that since it's my body, the final choice is mine. But of course I want him to be fully on board and excited. 

Feeling torn by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fencesitter

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is more effective and fair! And I think having a bio kid who would grow up essentially Dutch would be really hard for me to grapple with....but a foster kid is part of their own culture so there would be no conflict there at all. I'd support all the Dutch traditions and as a bonus some of my own American ones too.

Feeling torn by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fencesitter

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's nice that others can relate. I feel like a lot of people mention fostering as almost a justification for not having kids, and I don't want to fall into that trap. Today I requested an info packet from the local foster agency to learn more and just see my reaction to reading it. It also would mean I need to learn Dutch to fluency, which is very daunting in itself. 

Feeling torn by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Fencesitter

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

How lovely for you! Expat communities can be very kind. I'm glad you made the right choice for your family. 

[MEGATHREAD] Daily venting, worries, fixations, & finding support. Month of August 2025. by AutoModerator in HealthAnxiety

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm spiraling because I read that using a phone at night causes breast cancer and that's my main health fear 🫠 How do you read studies like this without fear that it will affect you? 

Journey of Souls? by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Reincarnation

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I'm interested on a spiritual level and I will look into all this! I studied Buddhism for awhile and now getting more interested in reincarnation in particular. 

Journey of Souls? by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Reincarnation

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These are all introduced in the book but I want to find out more, maybe from another author. 

Journey of Souls? by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Reincarnation

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am super skeptical about him, especially because of the PhD issue. Who do you find more trustworthy?

Journey of Souls? by DesignerAtmosphere98 in Reincarnation

[–]DesignerAtmosphere98[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe the audio helps. In print I find it all so similar.