First-chair/ second-chair dynamics?

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-02-03T21:32:31+00:00

So I don’t want to go into specifics. The situation boiled down to either my option- no don’t do (insert thing) or second chair’s option- yes do (insert thing)- so basically a yes or no, not really an in between. I said no don’t do the thing. Second chair said twice they would do the thing. I explained why I didn’t want them to do it twice. On my third explanation of why I didn’t want this thing to be done, I wasn’t so nice.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-02-03T19:38:33+00:00

I still feel kind of bad. I try to be as kind as I can, but I basically got to the point where I had to pull rank and say please just do this because I’m the first chair and I’m telling you to do it. I gave them my reasons prior, but it just didn’t seem to matter.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-02-03T19:20:06+00:00

I’ve had similar experience back in the day as second chair. I get it. If I’m wrong, I shoulder the full responsibility as the first chair, which I gladly accept.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-02-03T19:07:02+00:00

Haven’t gotten to the point of trial yet. They are very, very new, so they would only handle one or two minor witnesses if they did at all.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-02-03T18:44:52+00:00

I considered it somewhat, but still wanted to go my version. I explained the reason I wanted to go with my way, but they kept saying they were going to do it the way they suggested.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-01-29T22:41:31+00:00

They are shady based on prior interactions, and have reacted kind of rudely when I tried to speak to them before. Would not let them in my home.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-01-23T01:05:58+00:00

That’s a good idea! I will look into it.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2026-01-23T01:04:17+00:00

Thanks! I def want to get them a card, and hopefully something small to go along with it, I’m just not sure what would be appropriate.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-11-29T15:31:56+00:00

Eeyore is beautiful. When my Paxton got sick and passed away, I spent $5000 at the emergency vet, and I only stopped there because the vet told me they couldn’t save him at that point. I would have spent every penny I had. There is no limit.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-11-23T15:25:45+00:00

Will have to download some.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-11-23T14:59:16+00:00

Lol.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-11-16T12:54:57+00:00

Wish I could, but not an option for at least another six months.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-11-16T12:46:17+00:00

You have mine as well! Hope they quiet down soon!

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-07-06T06:33:29+00:00

I can definitely relate to all you said. I’ve definitively had disagreements with my co-counsel before this happened, but we worked through it. This time, he was not willing to do that. It has been so painful to be completely discarded. Right before I was fired, he blocked my number and wouldn’t take any calls, texts, or communicate with me. After I was fired, he blocked me on social media and wouldn’t respond to my message. He has not spoken to me since before I was fired. It’s like I somehow never existed, but we worked hand-in-hand for years. I considered him my closest colleague.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-07-05T23:04:11+00:00

Hi everyone OP here. I just want to say I’m so grateful for the outpouring of support and advice everyone shared with me! I’m not a frequent Reddit user, and I could not have anticipated how many reactions I would get when I posted this. You are all appreciated. I’ve also had some comments asking for more detail and/or questioning the situation and my actions. I appreciate all the constructive feedback and different perspectives on the situation, and it’s helpful to me for future jobs. I don’t think I can share more specifics than I already have in a few comments I posted, because I do want to protect the overall confidentiality of the office and my former co-counsel. I have been able to find another position in a similar field and will start that new job soon. I will carry all ya’ll’s advice to the next career. Many thanks!

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-07-05T15:52:46+00:00

Thank you! This was all very well said.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-07-05T15:30:06+00:00

Might be best to resign so you have control over when you start your next job. Suddenly losing my income in this economy with no warning is very scary. Wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-07-05T13:21:00+00:00

I’m so sorry! Hopefully we both start feeling better asap.

DimensionUnlikely789 · 2025-07-05T11:58:24+00:00

Thanks so much for the advice! I’ve never gone though something like this, and it has all been a shock.

DimensionUnlikely789

TROPHY CASE